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Who did you tell when?

(20 Posts)
VirtualPointyHat Fri 07-Nov-14 12:31:02

I think title says it all,

I am 5 weeks today, DH wants to tell all and sundry. I don't want to tell anyone one minute, and the next want to tell lots of people as I need support etc. I also need to start planning certain things in life and would be easier if others new.

DSis has always told family as soon as she knew, but none of my friends have DC yet so just trying to gauge a range of what others do

leanne963 Fri 07-Nov-14 12:36:20

You do what feels right for you. Last time i was pregnant i told all of my close family and friend at 7 weeks, but unfortunately had a MMC at nearly 12 weeks. This time i fell pregnant and my head was telling me to wait until after the 12 weeks scan to tell people but i STILL told my close family and friends as soon as i found out.
I personally would only tell the people that are closest to you. I have seen big pregnancy announcements on Facebook at 6 weeks pregnant and personally thought that was a little too early.
But, do whatever feels right for you. There is no right or wrong answer smile

foxyfemke Fri 07-Nov-14 12:42:56

Told my folks, my MIL and a couple of very close friends when we found out, so at around 5 weeks.

I had to tell my boss at 6 weeks as I was so tired and needed some flexibility at work.

Told some of my wider family (granddad and auntie), my husband's brother and good friends after 8 week scan.

Told my husband's wider family when we went over to visit family (we live in different country to his family) at 14 weeks as we wanted to tell them in person and we had that trip planned long before I got pregnant. After we told them we went public on Facebook.

SleepyMcgee Fri 07-Nov-14 12:50:40

Congratulations! You'll know what's best for you and your situation but we only told a couple of close people until after the 12 week scan with DD as I had a miscarriage with our first pregnancy. I didn't tell work until I was getting a bump at 15 weeks and couldn't hide it any longer!

VirtualPointyHat Fri 07-Nov-14 13:04:34

Id like to tell our parent soon I think, especially to find out if there is any relevant medical history, but DH's DParents are out of the country until xmas so would have to be by skype.

My other issue is I run a brownie unit, I only have 1 adult helper, she is leaving at the end of summer term, and my due date is July, so if I can't find another leader I will have to close the unit. The earlier I tell people that the greater likelihood we can find someone, but selfishly I also want to protect myself

DecaffTastesWeird Fri 07-Nov-14 13:13:56

I told my DSis and DDad at about 6 weeks. Everyone else (apart from my DH obviously) after 12 weeks scan.

VirtualPointyHat Fri 07-Nov-14 15:37:34

thanks decaff

BusyCee Fri 07-Nov-14 15:41:43

Congratulations! With first pregnant told DF and wicked stepmother at 7 wks. Unfortunately had MC the following week - the bitch said she'd told me at the time it was too early to tell people. What a charmer. Since then I've deliberately waited as long as humanly possible to tell them - last pregnancy I was nearly 5months. I know it's petty and mean and unhelpful, but it gives me a little fillip

Congratulations again, and enjoy it as much as you can. It's fab!!

cheshirem2b Fri 07-Nov-14 15:58:46

You have to do what is right for you. We told our parents at around 7 weeks and I'm glad I did as I had bleeding (all was fine) and needed my Mum's support. We didn't tell anyone else then until after the 12 week scan and then we told EVERYBODY!
Congratulations and good luck with your pregnancy!

PeppermintInfusion Fri 07-Nov-14 16:35:54

We ended up telling most people before the 12w mark- our parents right away and few close others, then a few weeks later the close friends we socialised with regularly as they would have guessed anyway if I was suddenly not drinking and then there was several friends/relatives that we don't see v often and happened to see before the 12w scan so it was the right time to tell them.
Tbh I struggle telling people, DH wanted to tell everyone. Even now most people at work don't know and I didn't tell my boss til I was 34w.
I ended up putting it on FB (I have a smallish friends list anyway so not like telling all and sundry) at about 15w as I hated having to tell our wider circle of friends, I find making announcements like this awkward.

PeppermintInfusion Fri 07-Nov-14 16:37:22

24w not 34 when I told my boss, that might have been a bit too obvious by then! blush

VirtualPointyHat Fri 07-Nov-14 16:46:06

Haha yes peppermint, even naive me might have spotted it by 34 w grin

NaiceNickname Fri 07-Nov-14 16:55:58

Not a soul until our 12 week scan. Had a previous MMC, then a normal pregnancy, but didn't want to tempt fate this time so we waited. Even when my dad started commenting on me getting 'fat' hmm it was hell keeping quiet but I don't regret it.

Sister found out she was PG a few days after I announced mine and told everyone right away and went on to find she had lost baby at her scan, same way I found out about my MMC confused everyone was gutted, which is part of the reason I kept quiet too, didn't want everyone else as well as us to be upset if anything bad did happen.

Congratulations btw smile

VirtualPointyHat Fri 07-Nov-14 18:21:04

Naice - I am sorry to hear that

As much as I know what I say won't change the outcome I am reluctant to tell too many people for that reason.

however maybe I should tell the people I would need support from in case of MC, i.e. parents and close friends

muddylettuce Fri 07-Nov-14 18:28:24

I had to tell people early, about 6 weeks thanks to hyperemesis. Glad I did as have needed their support massively. When I say people, manager, family and bestest friends. Had to tell more friends today (11 weeks) as frankly I am huge. With my first I waited until 12 weeks scan. X

dietcokeisgreat Fri 07-Nov-14 18:58:39

I am 8w and have told parents and parents in law plus two good friends. Am feeling awful and needed support this week sad gave proviso will untell them if have mc.

Planning a general announcement after scan ( which i have just got the date for 13+5!). However if my morning sickness gets any worse i might have to tell work earlier than that.

Elledouble Fri 07-Nov-14 20:37:30

We only told our parents before the scan. Then we told close family, then extended family, then friends at about 14 or 15 weeks. I told people I work with yesterday - I'm 16 weeks - just dropped the bombshell, I was weirdly scared about it, so just blurted it out. Fine with it now though - had my 16week appointment today and heard the heartbeat so we're both healthy smile

ApocalypseThen Sat 08-Nov-14 11:20:19

My mother told me I was pregnant. I didn't believe her, I did a test, it was negative but another the week after was positive. Apparently she can smell it. So she knew from the start. Other than that, I've only told my best friend. We're waiting until 12 weeks to tell everyone else because I miscarried before and we decided we'd struggle with too much sympathy were it to happen again.

VirtualPointyHat Sat 08-Nov-14 16:48:48

Think I will tell parents next weekend. Then everyone else at Xmas after 12w scan

Naomip88 Sat 08-Nov-14 20:56:27

i told my immediate family and close friends when we found out but my DP told EVERYONE, he was very over excited but it got out of hand! He told so many people that people at work found out before I told them as they had heard from their friends who walk their dogs with my partner. My neighbours all knew before my granny! He soon realised before the 12 week scan that this had been a bad idea but luckily everything was fine.

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