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midwife negitive about homebirth?

(14 Posts)
silverfishlondon Mon 03-Nov-14 14:29:23

Pregnant with first, 29 weeks. I'm 27. In London so not too far from several hospitals. All smooth so far and low risk..
Done lots of research on homebirth and aware of slight increased risks with first baby. Spoken to friends with homebirth. So at last mw appointment raised the subject with her, expecting a bit of enthusiasm or at least interest! She was decidedly negitive making me feel silly for suggesting it ( last time she seemed really nice) .

Said things like:
' welllll.. but the ambulance service can be busy and it can be rush hour..'
' the midwife unit wants us to encourage more people to go there'
' goodbye, stay healthy. You'll have to stay healthy if you want a home birth!'
And surgested I would have to do some thinking about it which I clearly have done before raising it.

I was just left feeling a bit down and questioning my choice. I'd really been positive and looking forwards to it before. Are other midwives ( like one for home check) gonna be more encouraging? Wanted support!

naty1 Mon 03-Nov-14 16:21:43

I dont know mine never mentioned home birth and the girl i know who tried (1st baby) was transferred to hospital in too much pain.
Its great you have the choice.
I had forceps and ventouse. I dont think i could have had either at home, i was also put on a drip and it became rather urgent when i had a temp (infection ) from waters breaking 18hrs before. Not sure what they were about to do when they found me 10cm dilated as they couldnt get a vein to give me antibiotics. this was with drs - maybe consultants.

If you have a hospital birth chances are youll be sent home a few times as not far enough on.

I also know a girl who haemorrhaged a lot after the birth. She was fine in hospital.

I think most people are fine with a home birth but you dont know until it happens. My DSis was born breech as was her baby by CS. Must have weird hips in our family smile

If youre lucky you may only be in hospital a few hours anyway.

Im not quite sure of the push for home births really. The traffic round here is awful in rush hour.
The one positive i can see is having the mw to yourself.
Sometimes the midwifes can be quite honest, mine said 'ask for the epidural as soon as you get to hospital as they are often too busy to give you one'
Well thats not exactly what happened - the mw wouldnt let me have 1 till i was 4cm.

I think my hospital may have had a less intervention area (midwife led unit)

RetroHippy Mon 03-Nov-14 18:04:01

My mw is very pro home birth. I think it's particular to the local area. At my booking in appt she mentioned it as soon as she'd realised that on paper I'm a very straightforward case

I have no desire for a hb in the least. MW led unit with lovely low lighting, my own room, nice music and a bath; yes. Medical services on tap if required; emphatically Yes. Not having to look at the cobwebs or shoo the dog out whilst giving birth; oh hell yes!

Maybe if I wasn't a slovenly housewife I'd consider it blush

soundsystem Mon 03-Nov-14 18:10:09

Sorry to hear your midwife wasn't very positive. Think it depends on area, as where I am (North East London) the midwives have all been enthusiastic about me having a home birth for my first (low risk, close to the hospital if I need to transfer). Transfer rates are high for first time mums (47%), with the main reason for this being requests for additional pain relief. The opinion amongst midwives I've spoken to seems to be that you're as well starting off at home and seeing how you get on: if you feel it's too much and you'd rather be in hospital, well we'll go to hospital and nothing lost.

silverfishlondon Tue 04-Nov-14 10:34:53

Thanks for replies.
I'm happy to go in if necessary or even hint of a problem, but I don't think that that possibility is a reason not to try at home first.

No you couldn't have forceps or ventuose at home, but the evidence is theres a much lower risk of needing it if at home. Also risk of hemorrhage after is much lower.

I'll go ahead with home assessment then see how we feel then.. can always change our mind any time!

Flisspaps Tue 04-Nov-14 10:38:29

The home assessment means nothing - they don't decide if your house is suitable to give birth in, you do.

hollie84 Tue 04-Nov-14 10:40:08

All the community midwives I saw with both my pregnancies were very, very enthusiastic about home birth. In fact with the second one I agreed to a home birth knowing I would probably go to hospital just because the MW was so excited grin

gillyweed Tue 04-Nov-14 10:55:33

I had my first at home in Manchester (granted, not anywhere near as big as London but still a big busy city.). My midwives were on board from the get go - is it always the same midwife you see? She could simply have been projecting her own personal opinions on to you.

I'm waiting on my 2nd now (39wks today!) another homebirth but in a much more rural area - its been a little bit of a fight to get this far, hb are just not that common here. Most midwives I've met have been great and encouraging, but the last one asked some strange questions about why and basically implied I was a crazy hippy... Oh well!

Its true, there is less intervention at hb, your generally left to progress in your own time. Stats are slightly skewed as if you transfer you are no longer counted in the hb rate. I was transferred (after) for some stitches, not sure whether I count or not! but it was still everything I hoped, empowering and I liked that I remained in control (well, for most of it!!!).

It was great, and I'm a big hb advocate. Remember you can change your mind at pretty much any time and go in, good luck and stick to your guns if you decide its what you want!

babykonitsway Tue 04-Nov-14 16:26:54

Do lots of research, only you can make the decision.

They only though in my head would be is "what if". What if you were an unlucky one - baby got distressed and needed out immediately, what happens, wait for ambulance to get to hospital? Could be fatal.

What if you haemorrhaged, again delay in getting to doctors and hospital could be fatal.

It boils down to where or not you wish to take the risks and if God forbid something terrible happened, would hindsight destroy you.

I may be harsh but a colleagues wife died during homebirth. He is now raising the child alone. The inquest revealed that if she had been in a hospital she would have been saved. The delay in getting to hospital cost her her life. She was a low risk, healthy, first time mum. Absolutely horrendous.

hollie84 Tue 04-Nov-14 16:35:00

I suppose the flip side of that is to also look at how many women die during hospital births.

Roonerspism Tue 04-Nov-14 16:43:46

I contemplated a home birth. I was low risk. Easy pregnancy and no health issues.

As it happened, I had a massive haemorrhage just after delivery. Massive. Barely a day goes by that I don't think "thank god I decided against a home birth for my first". I very much doubt I would be here.

I think they are possibly an option for number two, when you know how your body will react. But for number one? Well, I honestly think it doesn't stack up.

silverfishlondon Tue 04-Nov-14 16:54:49

Thankyou for honest replies. Eek, yes those stories really make you think. Homebirth could be lovely for the majority, but... I also think about my husband, he's happy to support me but admits my safety is his biggest concern. Ooh I don't know..

Allstoppedup Tue 04-Nov-14 17:06:00

I was soooo loving the idea of a homebirth whilst pregnant with my DS (my first and currently only!)

I'll be honest, after actually giving birth I'm not sure I would consider it next time round. Security of the hospital and the speed that I was dealt with when DS became distressed certainly swayed me. I also got stitched straight away etc.

I HATED being in the hospital after and next time would certainly leave earlier than they allowed me this time but I do think I will stick with a hospital birth next time.

Good luck with whatever you decide!

PontypineNumber9 Tue 04-Nov-14 20:11:18

I also contemplated a home birth for my first. I had a straightforward pregnancy and was deemed low risk. I was quite keen on the idea but DH was worried so I opted for a hospital birth. I ended up needing an emergency forceps delivery in theatre after DD became distressed. She was very ill at birth, had to be intubated, was taken straight to intensive care where she had organ failure and a series of strokes. I honestly dont think she would be here if I had had her at home (we live in London and with traffic its a long journey to hospital).
Of course thechoice of where you give birth is down to you (and your partner). But I agree with the advice another poster gave of keeping it as an option for number two if things are straightforward with your first.

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