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So the 20-week scan I've been dreading is nearly here

(55 Posts)
VJONES1985 Tue 08-Apr-14 18:32:26

A while ago I posted about my fears about the anomaly scan. Well, the scan is this Thursday and I don't feel much better about it. Any tips on dealing with serious worries?? I have no reason to be worried but I know there is about a 2% chance of a baby having serious problems (or something like that) and just keep thinking it'll be me. Just want the scan to be over!

GingerRodgers Tue 08-Apr-14 19:42:17

It's the anomaly scan so you're bound to be worried but can you try to think of it this way- nothing you do now will affect the outcome on Thursday.
Have you got anything to keep you busy until then? Spend your evenings pampering? Organising? Writing lists for what needs doing/buying?
I know what you mean, I've got 3 weeks and in trying not to think about it. Statistically we should be ok.

VJONES1985 Tue 08-Apr-14 20:55:34

I think the hardest thing is the thought that I've bonded with the baby now, we are excited and have bought things, etc, and there is still the possibility that it won't end well...

As I'm a teacher I am off work this week, which makes it hard to keep distracted but will try to have a busy day tomorrow. Arrrgh!

GingerRodgers Tue 08-Apr-14 20:59:28

I'm not sure it would be possible to keep yourself from feeling anything until the 20 week scan. Your body is so geared up to 'feeling' pregnant you can't help but bond.
Right, write a list of all the little jobs you need to get done and every time you start worrying you can get your list out and start keeping busy wink
Glad to see all's going well, we were on the ttc boards together (I've nc'd) and it's nice to see things are going well for you smile

VJONES1985 Tue 08-Apr-14 21:02:09

Thank you, and you :-) How many weeks are you?

JustAboutAdeqeuate Tue 08-Apr-14 21:05:35

No tips, but you're not on your own. I literally sobbed myself to sleep a few nights before the 20 week scan utterly convinced that it was going to be dreadful. I held my breath through the entire scan, convinced the bad news was about to come. Everything was fine, odds are it will be for you too, and even then a lot of issues are very fixable. Keep busy! Good luck.

GingerRodgers Tue 08-Apr-14 21:14:37

18 weeks. I think sometimes we can know too much! With dd I just thought about seeing her again and finding out she was a girl. Never crossed my mind something might go wrong. Ah, to be ignorant again eh?!

VJONES1985 Tue 08-Apr-14 21:29:25

Yeah, my mum didn't quite understand my fears (given that she was pregnant in the 80s) but then she watched OBEM and understood a bit more.

amy246 Tue 08-Apr-14 21:29:35

I've got mine on Monday and I'm so worried! I've felt really strong movements already though so I'm hoping that's a good sign! Generally I've been feeling really weak and crappy which has actually taken my mind of it! I also keep looking at my 12 week scan pic to remind myself how lovely it is to see baby smile

VJONES1985 Tue 08-Apr-14 21:31:05

Aw yeah, at least we're all in the same boat. I've had strong movements too and have listened to the heartbeat with my home monitor.

squizita Tue 08-Apr-14 21:33:48

:/ Many women don't feel movements yet... most of them are fine at the 20 week scan. Just saying, as someone may get worried!

amy246 Tue 08-Apr-14 21:35:17

I think I remember you from the conception forums: seems like a long time away now! All that worrying and POAS! Ha ha! Good luck for you scan

VJONES1985 Tue 08-Apr-14 21:36:37

Squizita - good point and very true.

VJONES1985 Tue 08-Apr-14 21:37:14

Amy - yeah, now we have something else to worry about instead!

mssleepyhead Tue 08-Apr-14 22:37:20

I've got mine tomorrow and feel exactly the same. Have been away buying things for baby for the last few days, which has been great but now we're back I'm hoping I haven't jinxed it... : ( fingers crossed for you, vjones. I hope you haven lovely scan.

VJONES1985 Tue 08-Apr-14 22:59:59

And you, sleepy. Lots of luck.

Boogles91 Tue 08-Apr-14 23:15:28

Tbh, all i was worried about was that our baby had died until i saw him again on the screen. Even though i could feel him bumming about in there, i couldnt think about anything else. It wouldnt bother me if our lil man had a serious condition...would adapt our lives to accomadate and love him no different. But hes growing perfectley aparently smile mc give you terrible anxiety about being pregnant sad just try not to think about it...focus on just seing your lil bugger on that screen tomoz, not what could or might be wrong. smile are you wanting to know the gender? X

VJONES1985 Wed 09-Apr-14 12:57:23

Yes, we're going to find out the gender. Scan is at 9.40 tomorrow, followed by a specialist scan on the baby's heart at 11.20 (because I'm type one diabetic). Baby hasn't moved much today so that's freaking me out already.

MissMagpie Wed 09-Apr-14 13:37:38

I am 16 weeks and having my anomaly scan in 3 weeks time. It is scary when you realise how many things could have gone wrong but my midwife gave me some good advice - she told me to enjoy being pregnant and not to worry too much because otherwise you will end up missing out on the fact that what we are doing is the most wonderful thing.

I am a born worrier and am astounded at how lightly some people take things like scans, attitude to folic acid, drinking in pregnancy etc. but at the end of the day, the vast majority of babies are fine so it is really better to be positive and assume everything is ok until told otherwise. Easier said than done, but I have found it settles my nerves a little. Good luck!

VJONES1985 Wed 09-Apr-14 13:44:29

Thank you. As you can guess, I am also a worrier!

squizita Wed 09-Apr-14 13:47:22

I'm 17+ and worried because I have had a bad scan (partial molar) in the past.

Someone said this time "It's very very unlikely to happen once... even more unlikely to happen twice!" which is a comfort.

VJONES1985 Wed 09-Apr-14 13:51:55

I don't even want to think about molars, etc :-/ But yes, you are right and the likelihood is that all is well for you this time :-)

mssleepyhead Wed 09-Apr-14 16:59:36

scan this morning revealed a very active, wiggly, thumb-sucking, heading-kicking (his own!) baby boy : ) found it all a bit nerve-wracking as they went through all of the essential organs, but it was all ok and the size is happily average. best of luck for yours now, vjones. hope it's wonderful : )

VJONES1985 Wed 09-Apr-14 17:02:42

Head kicking?? Ha haaa!! Glad all was well. How long did it last?

mssleepyhead Wed 09-Apr-14 17:19:26

it took about 25 mins including an internal scan to check the length of my cervix. baby was in a good position so it was quite straight forward really. phew!
and yes, our best photo is of him doing an overhead kick with his foot firmly planted on his forehead : )

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