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Is it okay to say I'm not a fan of the pregnancy experience?

(82 Posts)
januaryJump Sat 05-Apr-14 12:44:24

Only 7wks with DC2 (surprise baby! DC1 is 16mo). Already tired of the 24h nausea - well, I'm just tired anyway - and had first vomit this morning, ick. Housework already taking a backseat and planning to go on leave at earliest opportunity, around 27wks. Sounds early days, I know, but all I can think of is taking time off and hiring a cleaner blush Hips, back and pelvis already ache and I can't really stomach anything other than sandwiches and lemonade. Tons to do for work and study but struggling at the moment.

I'm grateful to be pregnant and though it was a surprise we're very happy, hoping everything goes perfectly and looking forward to meeting our second little one. I know it could also be harder so I'm trying to be very positive.

...I just really don't enjoy pregnancy! I'm not the only one, right? My two closest friends "loved being pregnant" and had "fantastic pregnancies", so they don't quite understand why I don't. I'm sure I'll perk up a bit in the 2nd tri with hopefully no sickness but in pg1 I was just so tired and achey all of the time. I got a trapped nerve in my thigh that could be mega painful, had to wear Tena pads, and got acne. I never even nested! That just sort of bypassed me. I'm hoping it's different, easier, this time confused

Ok, I'm done blush

Viviennemary Sat 05-Apr-14 12:48:36

Of course there is nothing wrong with not enjoying it. I know quite a few people who don't and didn't even have any particular problems. Just do what makes your life easier and get a cleaner if you can afford one. I quite liked being pregnant. But not everyone does and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Hope you feel better soon.

3DcAndMe Sat 05-Apr-14 12:50:52

Of course not

I would rather be in labour for a week than be pregnant for 40

Salmonspringroll Sat 05-Apr-14 12:51:44

Why would we enjoy it? I've had sickness all the way through (im 35 weeks now) backache, spd, headaches, acne, piles (tmi sorry!) varicose veins and no energy! I went on maternity at 29 weeks to sort flat out and haven't had the energy to even do it! The things women have to go through eh?!
But.... Just think, it will all be worth it when we have them on our arms ����

Beanymonster Sat 05-Apr-14 12:52:48

Another one here who hates pregnancy, I don't glow, my hair is greasy, I'm covered in spots, I'm the size of a house and been told 'your ready to pop!' From 19 weeks

I hate it. But it's worth it ;)

somedizzywhore1804 Sat 05-Apr-14 12:53:23

27 weeks now with number 1 and HATE it. So grateful to be pregnant and can't wait to meet the baby but Jesus- it's miserable. Sick, ill, tired and fed up!!!

RedPony Sat 05-Apr-14 12:53:58

I'm not particularly enjoying it either sad I love being able to feel little baby kicks and love knowing that in 3 months time I will have a beautiful son but the constant headaches/backache/spd pains/exhaustion/acid reflux/nausea is horrible sad .
I hope you feel better soon OP. have you tried those travel sickness bands for the sickness? it really helped for me when I was going through the 24x7 sickness stage

januaryJump Sat 05-Apr-14 12:55:36

Thanks for the replies, breathing a sigh of relief grin I think because I don't want it to be confused with not wanting to be pg, or not wanting our baby, which is probably massively overthinking it. But I think I found the birth and newborn stage more manageable, even though I was totally frazzled.

MyBalletShoes Sat 05-Apr-14 12:57:07

Perfectly normal. It can be an exhausting, draining and challenging time. Especially with a toddler!

And I'd take anything friends say with a pinch of salt. One friend I met through NCT classes was advising a group of mums at a bumps and babies group all about her wonderful pregnancy and how she could have easily done another 40 weeks. I sat there biting my tongue but was so ready to remind her about how she complained in every single class about her 'rubbish' pregnancy. Hindsight is a wonderful thing! wink

OrangeMochaFrappucino Sat 05-Apr-14 12:57:39

Loved my first pregnancy once past the sickness around halfway through. Didn't understand why so many women complain about it blush.

Well, I haven't stopped complaining this time! Exhaustion, nausea, insomnia, heartburn, restless legs, no let-up in the second trimester. Went on mat leave at 34 weeks but it's difficult to rest with a 3yo. I know having a newborn will be hard work but I can't wait to feel less uncomfortable!

scarletforya Sat 05-Apr-14 13:00:55

Pregnancy is horrible.

Jolleigh Sat 05-Apr-14 13:03:35

10 days overdue here angry I'm not a fan either.

moomin35 Sat 05-Apr-14 13:04:00

I'm so with you on this. 32 weeks today...

januaryJump Sat 05-Apr-14 13:07:09

You lot have brightened my day! Not that I am revelling in your misery, of course, but it's nice to know I have company grin

Here's to another 33 weeks... hope it goes really really quickly!

alita7 Sat 05-Apr-14 13:08:58

it's Ok I'm 9 weeks and unless I miraculously forget all this I do not want to do this again :p

I'm hoping once the nausea goes I'll enjoy it a bit more but then I'm sure there will be a new problem then anyway.

I want my baby so badly but I would like to get to term ASAP as I hate these symptoms :p

weebigmamma Sat 05-Apr-14 13:09:00

No guilt- pregnancy is awful lol. You do feel unable to moan about it too much because there are so many people who really want to be pregnant and I do feel very, very lucky as well. But hard to deny that it is basically the experience of having a large and growing parasite in your body for the best part of a year. Not fun by any stretch! I found that going shopping for cute baby clothes really helped me to visualise the end result and stop feeling too crap, but of course I didn't want to do that too early either. Good luck- I hope your sickness subsides very soon. xxx

Somanyillustrations Sat 05-Apr-14 13:13:00

40 weeks with DC2, and I have hated all but a few second trimester weeks not a huge fan of the newborn stage either . well worth it though :D

ohthegoats Sat 05-Apr-14 13:13:40

Yep, I'm only doing this once.

Somanyillustrations Sat 05-Apr-14 13:16:40

Oh, and I've had two straight forward pregnancies, it's still exhausting and I hate being fat.

weebairn Sat 05-Apr-14 15:04:13

I hate being pregnant. My last one was straightforward and this one is too so far and it still sucked.

The sleepless newborn bit I was fine with. Gestating for nine bloody months was just crap.

Just find people who have kids or who are pregnant to moan with, and don't say anything to people who are trying or who don't want kids. I think I've only met one person ever (maybe two ) who "enjoyed" pregnancy.

FirsttimerG Sat 05-Apr-14 15:07:01

I am thrilled to be pregnant but after 3 days walking around Rome at 13 weeks I am exhausted, my feet hurt in a way that's not normal, and I feel like it has stopped me enjoying something I've always wanted to do!
So you're not alone. Xxx

Jellymum1 Sat 05-Apr-14 15:20:12

35 weeks here and knackered and fed up and a miserable cow! everything hurts and everything makes me cry. I am being a shit mum and a shit wife and actually just a shit everything because I cant even crack a smile. I had a few weeks in the second trimester where I felt fab but 1st trimester sick as a dog and this last bit I am just a huge uncomfortable blimp. plus low bp equals continuous headaches and nausea and spd feeling like ive been kicked repeatedly in the c***. so no yanbu and you are not alone. I love being a mum love love love it but I hate being pregnant

januaryJump Sat 05-Apr-14 16:34:30

Righto, brew and cake for everyone who can stomach it.

Now if we could just arrange for some sort of pregnancy leave and other associated perks and benefits...

squizita Sat 05-Apr-14 17:10:24

I am fat, constipated and tired. I have too inject my leg every morning to stop my defective blood messing up my placenta.

I am more than happy to admit that whilst being thrilled about being pregnant, the day-to-day is a real grind!! Yuk!! Not fun at all!

What gets me really angry is when people who have had no problems ever conceiving or keeping their babies get judgey if I talk about my constipation and so forth. Like because I have struggled I should now go around LOVING the fact I can't poo and am covered in clexane bruises.

I could understand it from someone who has gone through worse, but smugness/judging from others really gets my goat.

alita7 Sat 05-Apr-14 17:14:17

agree squizz! We've all had our own problems whether apparent or not, so I don't understand why anyone thinks we should enjoy feeling shit. I am glad I still have morning sickness because I'm 9+2 and my last baby stopped growing at 9+ 4, if I still feel sick I hope it means things are ok for now. BUT I don't enjoy feeling like this by a long shot and I feel complaining is totally acceptable!

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