how to explain about DC2

[duzzlightyearsmum]

So for those of you who have done this before how is the best way to explain so DS1 who is currently 2 and 1 month that come September there will be another baby around? How far in advance do we mention it and when we do what should we say?

DS is quite advanced in terms of verbal communication and understanding, has been compared to children significantly older than him and obviously by September he will be closer to 3 so I imagine will be even more switched on than he is already so what do we do?? Any advice greatly appreciated!!!

TIA xxx

[Seff]

DD is a bit older, I'm 39 weeks now and she's 4 in a couple of months, but we started by talking about babies in general. Pointing them out in the street, at toddler groups etc. What babies can and can't do. Telling her things about when she was a baby and showing her photos. Then we started mentioning that we would be having another baby, and how she'll be able to help me look after it. We've tried to keep it positive, but realistic.

I do think we perhaps should have waited a little longer to tell her, we told her around 13/14 weeks and 6 months is such a long time at that age. She's changed a lot in that time too but has been very understanding about my tiredness.

[MyGastIsFlabbered]

DS1 was just turned 2 when I fell pregnant again. We used the book 'there's a house in mummy's tummy' to explain if and also talked with him a lot, got him involved with touching the bump etc. He got it amazingly quickly & has adapted to having a brother brilliantly.

[Foxsticks]

We are in the same position as you, dc2 is due in October. I'm not planning on saying anything until after the 20 week scan, just in case there are any problems. I'm thinking of getting this storybook to read to our dd to start conversations off.

[Foxsticks]

Crossed post with gast!

[chattychattyboomba]

We told DD (almost 3) earlier. I can't remember how but she understands there is a baby in mummy's tummy and it will be her sister...although she has started saying 'baby is not coming...baby wants to sleep' lately. I think it's a long time to wait but since she's perceptive she picked up on it anyway.

[Whiteshoes]

Hi. We probably started quite gently whenI was around 4 months. Our toddler was just when baby arrived and I think was v probably picking up our bits of baby conversations anyway. So the decent thing seemed to be to include her in it even though it was so far away.

I think the thing that worked best for us was books about new babies, which she loved, and really did prepare her for me going to hospital, granny looking after her, and baby coming home. She was completely unsurprised and delighted when he arrived home, I'm pretty sure because it all happened like the books!
We liked TheNew Baby published by Usborne, Za Za's Baby Brother by Lucy Couzins, and Princess Polly.

[hubbahubster]

We had to start reasonably early with DS (2) as he was body-slamming me, so we started with asking him to be gentle as there was a baby in Mummy's tummy. He's aware of babies in general and his understanding of what's going on has increased as my bump has...

[bopoityboo3]

DD is four and we told her after the 12 wk scan. I was very sick during the first 3 months and not my normal mummy self and we could see that she was picking up on the change in my energies etc. We just sat her down and showed her the scan picture and explained that there was a baby in mummies tummy and that she was going to be a big sister.
She was very excited.

Now that I've only got about 4 wks until my due date she has been asking lots of questions about what will happen when the baby comes, likes to rub my tummy and talks to the baby a lot about the things she is going to do for them like read them stories and show them how to write.

[Lamu]

For us we gradually broke the news. We told Dd who's now 2.5, when I was about 20 weeks. Then started reading the book "there's a house in mummy's tummy" most days. We also have quite a few friends with babies so that gave us a chance to talk about her being a big sister soon. Now that I'm 32 weeks, the baby clothes are out and she's seen how small they are. I've got the baby's car seat in the car next to hers. And the nursery is set up, so she knows where her sister will sleep. She's taken to saying "mummy's tummy's gettin gigga" . She also regularly talks/sings to my tummy and gets a kick in the cheek in response. I think she understands in her own little way, only time will tell how she'll take it.

[Misty9]

Ds was just two when we started talking about it in his earshot. I was so ill for the first few months that he would have definitely noticed something was amiss. I can't remember that we actually told him officially, but I'm now 35 weeks and he frequently says "cuddle sister" and hugs bump :) I don't think for one second that he really understand what will happen else he'd be asking for me to keep her in there! but he has his own little understanding of it.

Might start reading him some books soon, and he's being very understanding of mummy being too tired/big to sit and play for long, bringing his toys to the sofa as long as mummy isn't on the ipad, in which case he'll throw said toys

We've also set up the cot and he knows it as "sister's bed" and I think I'll show him some clothes soon too, good idea.

Congratulations!

[Misty9]

Oh, and ds wasn't at all verbally advanced at that age (is now!) but his receptive understanding was very good.