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Which appointments did your other half attend with you?

(70 Posts)
inmybelly Fri 28-Feb-14 04:18:34

Just curious!

My boyfriend is keen to attend all scans and is open to the idea of attending ante natal classes (although not keen!). But I think getting him to be there for midwife appointments and other GP check ups (unless something is wrong) may be pushing it!

What did your partner do?

Also, from the midwife/GP perspective are there any appointments that he really should attend?

Tomorrow I'm getting my 2nd HCG blood test done and we'll get the results later that day I think. My OH really doesn't want to come in with me for the test (we're both on annual leave this week) and when I pressed him for a reason why, he admitted it was because the parking is too expensive and he'd rather hover outside in the car!!

...I think this may become an ongoing theme...

Boogles91 Sun 02-Mar-14 00:37:43

My hubby comes with me to all mine if he can smile thers only been two midwifes appmnts that he couldnt make but they wernt important really, just results lol and im back at the hospital in couple of weeks, get sick of going, its all ive done my whole life!

Amiasmummy Sat 01-Mar-14 17:30:09

My OH has been brilliant. We've had lots of scans (due to my past) and he's been at every single one and the consultant appointment afterwards. That was at 12 weeks, 20, 24, 28, 32, 34, 35, 36 and 37 weeks. He's had to leave work early a few times and we've had to pay an incredible amount in parking fees but it's so worth it. He probably would have come to the midwife apps as well but I told him not to worry too much about those as it's just checking little things like BP, wee sample and measuring bump in the later stages. You do get to hear the heartbeat as well which I think is lovely to share with your OH, but we have a doppler at home and listened in all the time before I could feel proper movements so OH didn't feel like he was missing anything. grin

haggardolebat Sat 01-Mar-14 12:59:47

None. I'll be amazed if DH even makes the birth.

why I'm married to this piece of trash can, I'm soon to find out

IwishIwasmoreorganised Fri 28-Feb-14 19:15:29

Both scans with ds1, our 3 antenatal classes and then when I was induced.

Just the 20 week scan with ds2 and when he was born.

HowAboutNo Fri 28-Feb-14 19:13:42

DH has come to everything, minus one MW appointment. I'm glad he does, my brain is like a drain and I just can't seem to retain anything that is discussed atm. It's nice when I'm freaking out about something and he says "no, the consultant said that was fine, she wasn't worried about it" whereas I have no recollection.

Have considered taking notes in future appointments!

TheScience Fri 28-Feb-14 19:05:36

They do, but nothing your partner really needs to be there for - just find out from him if there are any genetic conditions, diabetes etc in his immediate family.

RebeccaCloud9 Fri 28-Feb-14 18:59:06

Do they ask anything at the booking appt re partner eg partner's family medical history? My partner is happy to come but is it worth it? I'm ok going by myself if he will just be a spare part smile

Pixielady83 Fri 28-Feb-14 18:07:59

In this pregnancy, my scans and my consultant appointments. He came to a few midwife appointments in my first pregnancy but he seemed rather surplus to requirements when you're just going through quick routine stuff so I told him not to bother with those again!

firstbaby01 Fri 28-Feb-14 17:53:36

My DP has come to every appointment and scan with me so far. I haven't asked him to come, he has decided himself as I don't think he wants to miss any of the excitement smile

dobedobedo Fri 28-Feb-14 17:17:29

DH comes to about half the midwife appointments and both scans, also he came to physio with me today too - just to be nosy though I think!

He's very excited about all this pregnancy malarky so it's hard to keep him away. I went to see a gp about a kidney infection and he even wanted to come in with me for that!

RedPencils Fri 28-Feb-14 17:15:33

OBEM - One Born Every Minute. Sort of fly on the wall documentary TV show set in a maternity ward.

Inbl00m Fri 28-Feb-14 17:10:44

DH is coming to everything, and I wondered if it was going to be overkill at first but it's been lovely having him there. He remembers to ask questions we've discussed and I've totally forgotten by the time appointments come round, and it really feels like we're in it together smile

notnowbernard Fri 28-Feb-14 17:07:24

3 DC here

He attended 4/5 scans
No Mw appts
Gave me a lift to the Mw place to have a sweep (3 separate times) didn't come in though
Births grin

TheScience Fri 28-Feb-14 17:05:19

DC1 - he came to the booking-in, both scans, any appointment involving taking blood as I'm needle phobic and need someone to hold me down hmm and an antenatal class (we both only went to one). And he was around for a home appointment too because he works from home.

DC2 - came to the 12 and 20 week scans but not a couple of extra scans I needed, came with me to a couple of practice nurse appointments for bloods and vaccinations, and to a 40 week appointment.

BluegrassLass Fri 28-Feb-14 17:02:15

What is the OBEM I see mentioned? I assume some kind of birthing movies?

KitKat1985 Fri 28-Feb-14 16:59:23

DH is coming to the scans but not other appointments. He's only started a new job a few weeks ago so we don't want to wind them up too much by taking too much time off, (especially when at the moment he is already taking some time off about once a week to go to physio appointments for himself). I'm not that worried about him not coming to every routine appointment anyway. Most of them I suspect they're just going to do bloods / check wee etc anyway so it's not like he's missing anything exciting. Having said that, he is going to try and come to some antenatal classes nearer the time, but I think we'll go to one of the evening classes so he doesn't have to miss work (or at worst, he'll only have to leave half an early or similar).

PenguinsEatSpinach Fri 28-Feb-14 14:34:56

12 and 20 week scans and amniocentesis. He works away a lot so hasn't been to midwives at all, but previous times he came a couple of times to hear the heartbeat.

KatAndKit Fri 28-Feb-14 14:29:04

All scans, and all consultant appointment (they usually are the same day as my growth scans). Midwife appt at 16 weeks when they check for a heartbeat, but not the other ones as him being there would be pointless. Last time we had 4 evening antenatal sessions which he attended. We probably won't bother this time.

ChicaMomma Fri 28-Feb-14 14:15:34

The 8, 12 and 22 week scans, so far.

He didnt come to the GP/midwife stuff in between, it was totally boring anyway! i've told him not to bother coming to anymore appts until i'm fit to pop (only 24 weeks now). He is very involved in general though so he might come to the 34 week one or something, if he has time in any case.

Cakebaker35 Fri 28-Feb-14 13:42:09

Very similar to most on here, dh came to both scans but none of the regular gp/mw appointments. I had to go to hospital after one of the mw appts so he just left work and met me there. He did come to nct with me - a bit grudgingly at first but I reminded him we were in it together! And he was really glad he did go, made good friends and did help prepare both of us a little for what was to come!

Windywinston Fri 28-Feb-14 13:34:04

Same here, DH came to both main scans, all other appointments including growth scans I went on my own as he was at work. We did do NCT classes the first time round and DH wasn't keen at first, but encouraged friends to do them afterwards!

The dads soon develop a kind of camaraderie and they get as much out of it as the mums do, maybe even more, because once you're in labour primal instinct will take over to some degree for you, but he'll have to rely on what he has learned to get him through and be the best birth partner he can be for you. Labour is not a time for experiencing nasty surprises - it's best for both of you to be informed so it can be a calm and wonderful experience for all of you. Good luck!

NerdyBird Fri 28-Feb-14 12:46:33

My DP has been to 12 week scan and will come to next one. He also came to the two early scans and two other assessment appointments when I had problems with bleeding.
He's not been to MW or GP appts. I see a consultant as I have ulcerative colitis and he doesn't need to come to those.

He is doing NCT with me though. I think he'd rather not but I've insisted. It's my first child but he's got two already. I don't see why I should do it alone just because he's already done it, after all he's never going to be the one giving birth!

I have a GTT in a few weeks and I'm hoping he'll drive me to that even if he doesn't stay as I don't fancy driving myself or faffing on the bus after fasting! I'll be fine after.

prettyinpink90 Fri 28-Feb-14 12:28:05

My DP has been to all of our scans... 8 weeks (private), 12 weeks, 20 weeks and 27 weeks (private).
We agreed that he didn't need to attend my midwife appointments as it's hard for him to get the time off work and i'm fine with that as they only usually take 10 minutes.
He has also attended all of our NCT antenatal classes so far and has actually shown lots of interest in them. I would feel completely out of place to be honest if he didn't attend as the other 7 ladies attend with their partners.

eurochick Fri 28-Feb-14 11:52:52

My husband has come to all scans so far and I'd expect that to continue. He hasn't come to any mw appointments though, and I am fine with that.

NickyEds Fri 28-Feb-14 11:10:25

My OH went to the scans only(2 regular and 2 extra) but not the MW appointments- there didn't seem to be any point in taking the day off and I was fine with that. He didn't come to the Glucose Tolerance Test and if we have another I'll make him come to that- after no food it took the midwife ages to get blood out of me and I felt dizzy!!! We did a MW led 2 hour antenatal class together.

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