Advanced search

What are the best products for you and your baby? From travel systems to sterilisers, you can find out all you need to know from our Mumsnet Best reviews

Find out more


(15 Posts)
Hurst87 Tue 18-Feb-14 18:50:03

Hi I was wondering if there are any ladies out there that have been pregnant or are looking to become pregnant and suffer from Emetephobia (extreme fear of vomiting/seeing others vomit). I would like to know how others have or haven't coped xx

PuppyMummy Tue 18-Feb-14 19:19:14

I haven't got this but just wanted to maybe reassure you that I haven't been sick at all during pregnancy...

I felt queasy occasionally but never even felt like I might be sick.

There is a chance it would be similar for you?

Kellyjdancer Tue 18-Feb-14 19:36:47

I do! I've been in therapy since becoming pregnant to try to work through my phobia. I would love a buddy, if you are interested.

Hurst87 Tue 18-Feb-14 19:40:59

I'm not quite in the same boat. I've suffered with this fear for 10 years and I desperately want a baby but can't bring myself to do it sad people tell me all the time I might not be sick, I might have no problems at all but these people do not have to live this way. How have you coped Kelly?

Xavielli Tue 18-Feb-14 19:48:07

I did. I didn't have any sickness with my first 3 children. I found that actually having bad morning sickness with my 4th has pretty much made the fear disappear. Strange!

Hurst87 Tue 18-Feb-14 19:54:07

How did you find the courage and sanity to get pregnant all those times?

Xavielli Tue 18-Feb-14 19:58:14

Honestly? Contraceptive failures and being young and foolhardy! I have found coping with sick children harder than being sick myself - I'm not saying this to make you more scared but so that you know I understand it's not just being sick yourself. This has eased off over the years too.

Hurst87 Tue 18-Feb-14 20:03:48

My fear is solely based on myself being sick. I can not be around people that have been sick due to bugs etc if it is from alcohol for example I am totally fine. I know children are sick often for many reasons too. But I think I could deal with that if it came to it. What I can't do is bring myself to get pregnant. I've tried coming off of the pill in the hope it would work, in turn I was scared to be intimate with my partner through fear of becoming pregnant x

OrangeMochaFrappucino Tue 18-Feb-14 20:18:05

I have always been very afraid of vomiting and very distressed by feeling nauseous because of this fear. As my mum and sister didn't suffer from morning sickness, I hoped I wouldn't... in my first pregnancy, I vomited several times a day most days for 20 weeks. This pregnancy I suffered severe and unremitting nausea with infrequent vomiting for 23 weeks and it returned in a less extreme form at 30 weeks. I know that labour for me is also preceded by vomiting.

If I had known this in advance, I may not have ever taken the plunge to get pregnant the first time. Thank goodness I didn't know! I found it very difficult to cope with at first and I didn't know how I would manage. The thing is that, like many fears, it is an irrational one. As it continued, I came to realise that the physical act of vomiting was not so frightening as I had built it up to be. It is certainly unpleasant and I do panic beforehand, however, I know that I can cope. I know it is over relatively quickly. It will always upset me but the fear and the dread has dissipated considerably - obviously, I was unafraid to embark on a second pregnancy because I knew I could handle it. And honestly, it is worth it over and over again. The love and joy my son has brought into my life makes every misery of pregnancy sickness recede into nothing.

Don't let this fear rule your life. You may be lucky and not experience sickness, but even if you do then you will be able to find strategies to cope. All the best!

Kellyjdancer Tue 18-Feb-14 20:36:02

For me, I desperately want to get past this phobia. I knew I wanted a family and I was determined to not let this stop me. I'm like you, I get filled with anxiety when I know someone has a bug... Knowing someone is sick because of being drunk doesn't bother me (as much).

I definitely have "safety behaviours" which are things I do to convince myself that I won't be sick. I think pregnancy has been really good for me as my body is reacting to life differently everyday.

I am making lots of progress. I do worry how I'll be when my child is sick. Hopefully I'll surprise myself.

Hurst87 Tue 18-Feb-14 20:41:52

I am not sure how I would find the strength.every day I think back to the last time I was sick 10 yrs ago and I try replaying the feelings and the action. I remember it like it was yesterday and it doesn't seem that bad at all. Yet I can change my mind set and this does rule my life 100%

Hurst87 Tue 18-Feb-14 20:44:04

I admire you already Kelly. To be doing what you're doing. I only hope one day I can get to that point. I make myself upset so many times over the thought of not having a baby but I just don't have it in me to let myself become pregnant sad

WhizPA Thu 20-Feb-14 17:35:59

Hurst87 - I know exactly what you are going through, I have been exactly the same since I was a child. The phobia 100% ruled my life - where I did, who I saw, what I ate etc etc. And yes - it even stopped me believing I could ever be a mum. The possibility of morning sickness and then the reality of a child being ill was all too much. I then worked through a book I came across called Cure Emetophobia And Thrive by Rob Kelly. I had always been sceptical of any treatment as I didn't want to talk about it or worse still go through exposure therapy. The book appealed as a) it was only 20 and b) I didn't have to talk to anyone. It was only a couple of months ago that I started reading it but it immediately made sense to me - the simple fact that it stated I am not afraid of **, but afraid of the emotional over-reaction I have created in response initially annoyed me, but now makes total sense.

I am not saying it will work for you but and I have not yet been 'exposed' and had to put it to the toughest tests. But I now feel much more in control of my feelings and had 'let go' of a lot of things. I now feel that I could cope and as a result it is not imperative to avoid any possible 'dangers'.

The rewards of being free of the phobia are huge - may be worth a try for you? If you do, let me know how you get on. smile

Hurst87 Thu 20-Feb-14 22:33:45

Hi WhizPA I do in fact own this book but can't believe it'd help. .. maybe that's just me. I've tried CBT, seeing a psychiatrist, a hypnotherapist, antidepressants I just can't see how a book would help? I guess I have nothing to lose by reading it either. Did you become a mum?

Hurst87 Fri 21-Feb-14 10:16:31

Hi WhizPA I do in fact own this book but can't believe it'd help. .. maybe that's just me. I've tried CBT, seeing a psychiatrist, a hypnotherapist, antidepressants I just can't see how a book would help? I guess I have nothing to lose by reading it either. Did you become a mum?

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now