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Family party at 36 weeks, 3 hr drive away, high risk for birth

(11 Posts)
owainsmum Mon 17-Feb-14 15:40:02

My aunt and uncle are having a 40th wedding anniversary party soon, and I'd love to go but I'll be 36 weeks pg by then. It's a 3 hour drive away and we would stay overnight but I'm a bit worried because I'm high risk for birth and would prefer to go to my local hospital if labour started early, rather than be in a strange place. I'm sure it won't happen that early though, I went 4 days overdue with ds, but I just feel like I don't want to travel too far at that stage, just in case. On the other hand I'd really like to go and I'm unlikely to go into labour 4 weeks early. What do you all think I should do?

MyNameIsKenAdams Mon 17-Feb-14 15:41:53

In this instance, you should do whatever you prefer. No-one would (or should ) judge you for not going, however if you want to, then just go.

I had a week away (uk) olanned for 35/36wks. I sadly had a mmc but would have gone even if pg.

Take maternity notes and car seat just in case.

noblegiraffe Mon 17-Feb-14 15:43:42

I wouldn't do it, not for a party. The journey would be really uncomfortable and you'd spend the whole time worrying about it.

I went to a wedding (my brother so I had to) 3 hours away at 39 weeks and the journey was horrible, even though I went by train so as to have toilet access etc.

pettyprudence Mon 17-Feb-14 15:58:13

I went away for a weekend at 37 and 38 weeks in both pregnancies and I was expecting home births for both so really didn't want to go in to labour early! the trips were 3.5hrs each way and it was fine! I got dh to do the drive up this time as I was too knackered after work. did have to take my jeans and boots off and travel in my knickers and tshirt to get comfortable though grin

GreenSunrise Mon 17-Feb-14 16:14:38

I went to a close friend's wedding at 38.5 weeks which was 2.5 hours drive away. I was in two minds for a while as my pregnancy was higher risk. In the end we went taking the car seat, hospital bag, my maternity notes and tel numbers and addresses of the nearest consultant maternity units to the venue.

I am really glad we went, it was a lovely last weekend ofefreedom before DC 2 arrived 2 weeks later. I didn't even find the journey that bad and drove half of the time myself.

You should do whatever you feel comfortable with. I knew that I would have been really upset to miss my friend's wedding and also that I didn't have my heart set on having my baby in my local hospital so it wouldn't have been a disaster to deliver in a hospital away from home. For me the only negative would have been if I had delivered away from home and then had to stay in for longer than expected as I would have been so far away from DC 1 who was at our house with my parents for the weekend.

In terms of feeling physically able to go, I booked our hotel room months ahead but only made the final decision the week before which was the last point at which we could cancel the hotel room and get our money back. Luckily I was still quite comfortable and active so didn't feel that I needed to cancel.

I can't imagine people not understanding if you decide to not go.

owainsmum Mon 17-Feb-14 16:21:12

Some good points, hadn't thought about being comfortable in the car for 3 hours each way! The reason I want to give birth in local hospital is I'm likely to be in for a few days. I have a history of very severe pph (7.2 litres with ds) so don't want to be miles from home and dh not being able to stay with me. If we do go to the party I need to book a hotel room, might see if I can get a refund if I cancel with enough notice though. Hmm still undecided!

tertle Mon 17-Feb-14 16:55:48

I'd see how you feel nearer the time. You might be horribly uncomfortable or feel fine. It's really up to you and how you feel. As other people have said, no one will judge you. I travelled at 35 weeks to the mountains, about 2 hours away from where I live and it was fine. But now at 37 weeks, I wouldn't feel like doing it.

With regards to booking hotels that can be cancelled, try I've booked a lot of hotels through them that can be cancelled 24 hours in advance. Just make sure you put a reminder in your calendar to cancel!

Armadale Mon 17-Feb-14 16:59:06

With a low risk birth I'd go,
with a history of severe pph I wouldn't.

Misty9 Mon 17-Feb-14 19:37:00

I probably wouldn't, just because of how uncomfortable it is now to travel far in a car at 33wks. trying to ignore the 3hr drive to gatwick on Thursday but then I do have SPD which is worsened by being sat still for so long. If I was in good health I might think about it.

vj32 Mon 17-Feb-14 20:50:16

I would say wait until the last possible minute to decide. With DS1 no way would I have gone that far in a car. Now I'm 36 weeks and if I was really motivated to go I probably would, but would put a couple of stops in.

VegetariansTasteLikeChicken Mon 17-Feb-14 22:24:52

what do you mean you are high risk for birth? Have you been told you will go in to early labor? 36 weeks is really unlikely unless you have been told otherwise.. especially if your first baby was over due.

I would go (if you want to!)

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