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Pregnancy

Dh away what would you do?

27 replies

K8eee · 13/02/2014 20:59

Dh has got to pick up dss for half term. I'll be 36 weeks when he leaves and he's got to go away for a few night prior for work reasons. The nearest family member is 2 and a half hours away, I have no local friends and this is my first baby so I have no idea what to expect. What would you do? Would you go with your partner, or stay at home that far into your pregnancy? Dss lives 5 hours away too so it's a long trip if anything were to happen.

OP posts:

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Mim78 · 13/02/2014 21:30

Tbh it's not that likely you will go into labour at 36 weeks and within the specific window of time he is away (that would just be unlucky!). I would opt to stay home rather than go through discomfort of the journey etc. 5 hours would probably get him back in time for a first baby anyway.

I would try not to worry bout it and have a chilled out time.

Have you thought about who will mind dss if you go into labour while she's there as that is a bigger window of opportunity?

But I think statistically you will probably last another few weeks (if not another six!)

SomethingOnce · 13/02/2014 21:32

I'd stay home on the grounds that you've a very good chance of nothing happening while he's away, and a ten hour round journey wouldn't be much fun at 36 weeks.

K8eee · 13/02/2014 21:42

I have wondered who could look after him, worst case scenario my parents would probably be more than happy to look after him here at our house I expect but I'm hoping I don't go into labour quite this early! We do normally do a lot of driving around, but to be honest now all I want is the comfort of my own bed, and home comforts. Dh totally understands this, I'm just worried with him being away and me being on my own.

OP posts:

Minnieisthedevilmouse · 13/02/2014 21:46

Then don't be, ask a friend over for a few hours....

K8eee · 13/02/2014 21:48

I have no local friends and any that I do have are at least 2 and a half hours away

OP posts:

chipsandpeas · 13/02/2014 21:55

think id rather stay at home and possibly go into labour than be in a car and possibly go in to labour

greentshirt · 13/02/2014 22:08

If you really know no one in the area then I would use the time to get out to some ante natal stuff and try and meet a few people!

Jolleigh · 13/02/2014 22:52

I'm in a similar position OP. I'll be 35 weeks next week and my OH has to go away for work for 2 weeks.

I know your loved ones are a while away but I'm sure someone would be more than willing to make themselves available, or at the very least, be 'on call' while your DP won't be there. In the course of most first time labours, they should have plenty of time to get to you.

Jolleigh · 13/02/2014 22:56

Curious though...if your parents could make it round to look after DSS, could they not be your standby for while your DP is away?

Christelle2207 · 13/02/2014 23:02

Last summer i was in this position-dh buggered off to glastonbury when I was 36 weeks! Booked before I got pg, obviously. We discussed him
Not going but he did and it was fine in the end- i was so moody fat and hormonal by then that a bit of peace did me good. Baby came at 41 weeks.

Christelle2207 · 13/02/2014 23:05

Oh and I was in labour for two days so if there was a crisis he would have been back anyway. I think I insisted on him driving instead of getting the train so he could get back in the middle of the night if he needed to.

MummyKnight · 13/02/2014 23:14

I'd stay at home, even if something does start to happen while he is away he should have plenty of time to get back again before you even need to go in (if your not planning a home birth). If it makes you feel easier I moved house from London to Gloucester at 38 weeks with my first and was fine (DD came at 39 weeks).

x0gawjus0x · 14/02/2014 06:40

If go with him I'd be really bored I hate being on my own lol I'd rather endure the journey atleast it wastes some time whilst you're waiting for baby :)

SweetPea86 · 14/02/2014 08:11

If you feel you could handle the 5 hour trip assuming its by car go with him, be a nice way to spend some time with him before baby arrives, and you can see your dss.
I have to say i miss my hubby when he goes to work for the day. And he had to work away when I was about 16 weeks I found it hard and I missed him. ( maybe I'm just a needy bugger lol)

Just pack all your creature comforts and make sure you will be comfortable.

TarkaTheOtter · 14/02/2014 08:23

I did a 5hr drive at 36 weeks pregnant with my second and was incredibly uncomfortable by the end despite having a generally very easy 3rd trimester so I would advise against.

K8eee · 14/02/2014 09:42

I did a trip from gloucester to sheffield to let on Monday, it was horrible .

My other option is to go to my parents for the weekend and also my best friends mum has offered to do a pregnancy photo shoot for me for nothing I'd be driving on my own though that's the only thing

OP posts:

greentshirt · 14/02/2014 10:01

Or you could get out and meet people locally! Not sure why you don't want to do this, being at home on your own all day with a baby can get pretty lonely I expect! At all the groups etc I've been to everyone has been really nice and up for making friends, everyone is in the same boat.

There's no point in having your life located far away when you can't really get there!

mixi82 · 14/02/2014 10:54

OP, I don't have any friends locally either and family is the same as you, 2 and a half hours away. But if I really didn't want to be alone then I'd call a family member and they'd come and stay for a few days. Could you not do the same?

K8eee · 14/02/2014 10:56

I could see if my parents wanted to stay for the weekend. All depends on if my mum can get time off of work

OP posts:

Morgause · 14/02/2014 10:58

Going to your parents may be a good idea, then you won't be panicking at every twinge.

Minnieisthedevilmouse · 14/02/2014 10:59

Oh this is now silly. Stay home. Just get on with life. Your making a crisis out of nothing here!

Minnieisthedevilmouse · 14/02/2014 11:00

Hmm do you have a worrying pregnancy? I'm ott if so. If normal tgen not quite so much....

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mixi82 · 14/02/2014 14:25

She's just trying to ask for advice Minnie and first baby too so quite normal to ask questions and look for support

Writerwannabe83 · 14/02/2014 15:10

When I'm just under 36 weeks DH will be flying to Austria for 9 days

I really wouldn't let yourself get worried about it, there's no reason to think anything will go wrong or you will need any kind of assistance and even if you do, that's what 999 is for Just relax and enjoy the peace and quiet, I know that's what I will be doing

BartBaby · 15/02/2014 07:58

I'm currently 33 weeks with dc2 and my DH normally works away 2 or 3 days each week. It could be anywhere in the Uk or even Holland or Germany. I'm hoping he will stop by the time im around 38 weeks, or just limit it to the Uk anyway. At 36 weeks i would agree that its unlikely you will go into labour, and if you did he should have plenty of time for him to get home. I wouldnt want to have to sit in the car for a 10 hour round trip even now. Maybe a few days at your mums or make some friends in your own area.

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