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Do you have meltdowns in late pregnancy?

(15 Posts)
middleclassdystopia Wed 12-Feb-14 11:31:57

I'm 31 weeks and was going strong until a week ago. To be fair I've had a lot on my plate, house move and a bereavement etc. But recently I've been losing my mental strength a bit and crying more.

This baby is so wanted but I've had enough. I was awake at 4am and couldn't get back to sleep because I was upset and worrying. Now I'm exhausted (have two other kids).

Just wondered how other's mental state is at this stage?

drivenfromdistraction Wed 12-Feb-14 11:46:14

Go easy on yourself. House-move and bereavement are up at the top of 'stressful life events' list. I found that throughout my three pregnancies I was extremely tired - so things like this really would have exhausted my energies. I also got pregnancy insomnia which is a killer when you can't go back to bed in the day, because you've got other kids to look after.

Set a date in the future (a good 6 months away!) when you will 'think through' the worries you have, and tell yourself that until then, you will just take things one day at a time. No mental pressure, and give yourself any small breaks you can - sit down for 5 mins while the other two are playing, instead of rushing off to do laundry/clear up, that sort of thing. You are growing a baby, so you are always doing something very important, even when you appear to be doing nothing. (as I used to tell DH about myself...)

Good luck.

middleclassdystopia Wed 12-Feb-14 11:56:09

Thanks driven. Kind words always help.

I think taking things a day at a time is key. I've been thinking too far ahead and getting resentful about the stresses that have been thrown at me.

drivenfromdistraction Wed 12-Feb-14 12:03:55

I find that lack of sleep really affects my mood (makes me irritable) and also makes me prone to worries that I can just shrug off normally.

My third DC was very wanted too. I had this niggling feeling that I didn't deserve her, that having two lovely DC already was enough good fortune for anyone, and that something would happen to her, or one of the others, because of it. I had a lot of anxiety dreams where that played out. I had to be quite stern with myself to dismiss those thoughts.

GuyMartinsSideburns Wed 12-Feb-14 13:21:48

I think I'm having mine now sad I'm pretty scared about the labour and at that "I don't want to do this anymore stage". Usually at the times when you wake in the night in the early hours and it feels like you're the only person awake in the world.

Please try and be kind to yourself, as others have said you're going through some really stressful things. Shelve those that can be dealt with another time as such, and take each day gently. The last thing you want is to make yourself ill with it all.

I have a boy and a girl already and sometimes in this pregnancy I've felt that maybe it was a mistake - don't get me wrong hes very much planned and wanted and I cant wait to meet him but it was like maybe as I already had my 2 I shouldve been happy enough and stopped at them, if that makes sense. Like maybe my pfb son wouldn't feel like my special guy anymore once his brother arrives. I hope I don't sound awful, its hard to explain.

I'm lucky in this pregnancy that my other 2 are at school so I can catch up on sleep in the day, but I remember well the tiredness when I had a toddler and was pg with my second. The tiredness was something else and I think its all too easy for your mind to race when you're not feeling 100%.

Lean on any support you have, go steady on yourself and know that it wont be like this forever xxx

HelenHen Wed 12-Feb-14 13:25:42

I'm 31 weeks too and have suddenly become a basket case grin

crazykat Wed 12-Feb-14 14:11:23

I was utterly barmy in my last six weeks of pregnancy. It away like extreme pms - one minute I'd be fine and happy then something silly like slightly burning toast would have me crying buckets, my hair not sitting right (daily occurrence normally) would make me really annoyed and frustrated.

It was either the hormones, lack of sleep or being fed up of being pregnant, or a combination as it disappeared a couple of weeks after birth, well until the next time I got pms.

bebbeau Wed 12-Feb-14 14:49:24

yes me

am 31+4 (every day counts!)

and really struggling with everything., lack of sleep, aches and pains, general tiredness, feeling so big and heavy

I honestly can't wait for the newborn stage over this, I much prefer it (got two other dcs)

SweetPea86 Wed 12-Feb-14 15:08:31

I've had a couple of melt downs. Due to lack of sleep and awful sickness. But I feel awful moaning about it when you have been through so much moving home and the loss of some one.

I think it's pretty normal to have a melt down once in a while let it all out rather than festering on it.

Get it off your chest.

I'm 31 weeks too and although I can't relate to your problems I totally agree with being done with been pregnant. I can't wait for my bundle of joy to be here but pregnancy has been hard.

Don't be hard on your self if you need a good meltdown have one. Cry shout scream in to a pillow what ever makes you feel better wish you all the luck in the world

Loopylouu Wed 12-Feb-14 15:15:14

Oh, I'm 33 weeks and a total fruit loop!

One minuet I'm crying the next I'm happy.

I'm also not sleeping and worrying lots which doesn't help.

Carsandtrucks Wed 12-Feb-14 15:24:01

I started mat leave early at 34 weeks cos I was going crazy. We were doing up the house and it was taking forever and I couldn't get to my wardrobe and the house was awful and I had my mum texting me every 2 minutes saying 'send me pictures' argh!!!!!

Misty9 Wed 12-Feb-14 16:22:26

Yep, I'm 32 weeks and crazy hormonal lady these last few days. Feeling more uncomfortable and also not sleeping well. So irritable and poor ds (2.5) is getting brunt of it. I flipped out (got really moody) earlier because he just would NOT go down for his nap. Then I fell asleep on the sofa and he threw all his toys outside in protest...must lock that patio door. Parenting fail. Can't say I think it'll be easier with two!

Give yourself a break, you've had a lot going on and these last few weeks are knackering and never ending - as you know smile

middleclassdystopia Wed 12-Feb-14 20:59:58

Thanks everyone, feel a bit better now.

You don't sound awful GuyMartins. I worry about the impact another will have on my current two. Like I've been a bit self indulgent.

Even though this is my third, I'd forgotten what a huge emotional upheaval pregnancy is. Yes I've been a bit unlucky having added stresses but to be honest I can remember having the odd meltdown in previous pregnancies.

It can be the slightest thing that tips you over and yes it's like extreme PMT.

I also feel I can't deal with or be bothered by other people's problems. I know this is utterly selfish but any patience or energy I do have is reserved for the kids.

drivenfromdistraction Thu 13-Feb-14 08:30:14

I don't think that's selfish, OP, I think that's a necessary survival instinct. I have that too, the feeling that I have (more than) enough on my plate and cannot take on anyone else's troubles for the time being.

GuyMartinsSideburns Thu 13-Feb-14 08:45:27

middle- I feel the same, like Id forgotten just what a rollercoaster pregnancy is. I also cant be bothered with anyone elses crap either, its hard enough dealing with this! At least I hope you now realise that youre not alone feeling like this xx

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