DD 10 months; and pregnant with #2... How on EARTH will I cope?(13 Posts)
Hello mummies out there,
I'm after some reassurance! Panic is setting in as I still struggle to get my first DD to sleep - she'll only be 17 months when the next one arrives, and I have no idea how I will cope with two!! How do people manage it? my first one takes up ALL of my time - I fear with a second one I REALLY wont have time to do anything else....
Someone - please offer me some reassurance that I am not completely crazy for going for this second baby....
I can't offer you re-assurance I'm afraid, my 4th DC is due April, 16 months after my 3rd, I will have 4 under 5 years, I'm shitting bricks actually. We have to be mental but tbh it is a great age gap, they don't stay small for long. They are a blessing. Going from 1 to 2 was the biggest shock (20 months apart) but now they are great friends
Posted too soon.
Good luck and be happy you are blessed again, enjoy your pregnancy and cherish every moment.
I have a friend who has 2 that are 13 months apart. She says the first year was tough and after that it was lovely.
My MIL had DD1, then 11 months later DD2, then 13 months later DS1. She said "it was a bit like having triplets." Then five years after DS1 came DS2, my DH.
My eldest two are 18 months apart. I don't remember anything being particularly traumatic.
It depends what you'd lifestyle and obligations are-we tended to stay close to home in the mornings, which helps if you're not trying to rush out if the house with everyone washed and dressed. If anything, it can sometimes feel harder with a young child now as we have to be at school for a certain time.
The best skill you can teach your eldest is how to entertain themselves. My eldest was happy to do puzzles or play for ages with his trains, which was a godsend when I was breastfeeding.
In my own experience, with the close age gap our eldest was not jealous or bothered by new arrival-it barely registered to be honest, which is always an advantage!
My two have a similar age gap and I prepared for it to be really difficult and honestly it was fine, not much different and they occupy each other a lot. My eldest got quite independent quite quickly in terms of wanting to walk and not go in the pushchair from 2 yet my youngest is 3 and still wants his pushchair and potty training took longer. In all though I felt like not much changed i was already a full time mummy, on 24 hr call and my sleep is the same, I still spend all my pennies on them, my social calendar is still packed full of children's parties and activity days, I still see my friends a couple of times a month at most. I love every minute to be honest, sure it's not an easy job but its worth it and you'll always love them so much you just do it. I never thought we'd have 3 but I can't wait :-) x
Someone I know had a baby then fell immediately pregnant again with twins - ended up with three children under 1 year old. Always looked brighter and bushier tailed than me, I have no idea how!
Thanks lovelies! The practical pointers are really helping put my mind at ease! Any more practical tips?
Particularly first few months I'm expecting to be a nightmare with needing time to breastfeed little one! My DD can play by herself for a good while, so pleased that will come in handy!
Tip 1- The tv is your friend here. Baby needs feeding: grab a cuppa, stick cbeebies on and snuggle in with baby & toddler!
Tip 2 - if you find yourself struggling to get everyone fed (including yourself), find 5 mins the night before/early morning to make a 'packed lunch' for you and toddler, so if things seem manic or you're chained to the sofa breastfeeding, you and your little one can grab your lunch bags and munch on the sofa (favourite character lunch bag could be a gift for sibling from new baby?). Helps on the days the baby seems permanently attached (you would be used to going without but you don't want a hungry toddler in the mix!).
As and when I think of others I'll be back.
Organisation is the key. And I know everyone says it, but truly sleep whenever they sleep. At least you won't have school runs or anywhere you have to be.
Bella blot i have the same as you 4 children with 13mths between the last two. So I had school runs, preschool runs to do as well as two babies.
I won't lie to you op it was hard graft, but its true its a pleasure to watch them now, 4 and 3 I finally feel like I have some time to myself. And they get along great.
Truly forget about housework and stuff for a while. Just cuddle and cherish your babies. Try and find some sort if routine. I remember being thrilled the day I got them both to sleep at the same time, I stuck to that routine and put myself to bed every time they napped.
Loving these tips Mummies! Please keep em coming! <hugs>
OP, I'm in same situation as you, DS will be 17 months when DC2 arrives. I'm trying not to think about it too much. I think the hardest time will be the first few weeks especially if I have to have a C-sec again.
We've started putting DS on the potty in the mornings to get him used to the idea and he can play inddpendently. He's off the breast (finally!) and just need to crack his sleeping pattern then i'll feel ready for anything.
It will be a challenging adventure with lots of snuggles along the way.
Had 15 months between my first two. My main tips, keep the older ones day time naps going, and then hope for the times that both go to sleep at the same time and go to sleep yourself (don't use the time sorting things out!)
Don't even think about potty training the older. Just set up your nappy changing area so that it is easy to do both. Mentally prepare for feeling like it is a never ending round of nappy changes and feeding for 6 months.
Take any offers from people to take the older one out for a little while. Then sleep as soon as the baby does. You will feel better for it.
Let the house worry about itself, (get in cleaner if budget allows) keep meals simple (some takeaways if budget allows)
Get as many nice. kiddy DVDs as you can so that you are not stuck with CBeebies on all the time. But do be prepared to use TV while you are feeding the baby, it does help, and it will not be for long before gaps between feeds increases.
Sleep whenever you can (just thought I would emphasise that one again!!!!)
And enjoy, they will grow up as really close buddies, it is wonderful to see.
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