In 4 months I will give birth to twins. It seems likely that they will be delivered by ElCS, as my first child was, due to breech presentation, and I'm pretty sure I won't have any more children. So I tell myself: "all these children and I will never have experienced the pain and joy of giving birth vaginally", which for me will be a huge regret on my deathbed. Even before I conceived the first one, I dreamt of having a home birth, and although I am at peace with the fact that I will never have one, I'm still thinking: "perhaps I could still try this time around for VBAC with twins?". The healthcare professionals at my hospital, as well as my partner and close family are against it, plus I have a very bad relationship with doctors anyway and there would be a huge amount of extra practical preparations and unknowns to worry about.
Like any mother, my priority is to have two healthy babies, and I would choose to have an ElSC as I would never put their health at risk because of my own fixation on a VBAC. But...I tell myself: what if I could protect their health and give myself the joy of giving birth naturally?
Ultimately, I appreciate it is my decision, but I'm looking for other people's stories of being in a similar situation.
What did you tell yourselves to accept that you didn't have the birth you always wanted?
what did you do in the end?
Thanks in advance for your thoughts.
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how do you feel about having never experienced labour and giving birth?
57 replies
orsettorusso · 16/12/2013 14:26
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