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Super Farts!!

(25 Posts)
Sammi1986 Sun 13-Oct-13 10:44:14

I'm having serious problems with wind, which I know can happen, but my god I stink :/
It's really embarrassing and I think my partner is ready to make me sleep on the sofa!
Help!! I'm not constipated, and I've tried eating different things. I don't know what to do.

FraggleRock77 Sun 13-Oct-13 10:46:32

No advice sorry but very funny smile. I have increased wind but just developed sneaky tactics to mask/hide them from my DH. Xxx

Sammi1986 Sun 13-Oct-13 10:48:28

Lol there is no hiding this! The other night I was feeling sick, but it was my own trumps that pushed me over the edge! Xx

Wallison Sun 13-Oct-13 10:49:15

I don't want to make you feel any worse, but since giving birth I can no longer do SBDs. Just part of the joys of motherhood, I reckon! (You do get a baby out of it though, and they are fab.)

WitchOfEndor Sun 13-Oct-13 11:01:23

One of the side effects of birth for me is that I am occasionally surprised by farts appearing without warning, not sure why, I just don't have the ability to anticipate and stop them anymore. blush.

Add that to the long list of things they don't warn you about OP grin

Sammi1986 Sun 13-Oct-13 11:05:51

What's an SBD?! This pregnancy lark is wonderful so far.....

Wallison Sun 13-Oct-13 11:06:56

SBD = silent but deadly. They are still deadly, but no longer silent.

Sammi1986 Sun 13-Oct-13 11:11:23

Haha that makes me chuckle. Yeah I sound like an old man and smell like something died!

Frizz1986 Sun 13-Oct-13 14:49:52

Omg this has literally just started for me. Am 27+2 and the past day or so has been awful. I am in fits of giggles at home but at work I have to hold it in and it really cramps me up! Dh is not finding it amusing at all and tells me I am worse than the dog.

Sammi1986 Sun 13-Oct-13 16:04:04

I tried to blame it on the cat and then bean. He's having none of it. Oops

ladymalfoy Sun 13-Oct-13 17:28:09

Im shocking at the moment. And getting worse. While DH works upstairs I fart to my hearts content downstairs. He will pop down regularly to check I'm ok and I know he's hitting a wall of stink.
I do it in bed too before he comes to bed.
I do it in the classroom and the boys blame each other! That's the best because they then try to identify what the culprit could have eaten to make it smell so bad.

princesspants Sun 13-Oct-13 18:06:46

If it helps Samni, I have had 3 and can still do sneaky ones. Don't quite know what has happened to the other MN's Ass's? grin

Legalbaby79 Sun 13-Oct-13 19:04:15

I m not to laugh and wet myself!!!!! smile

Bearfrills Sun 13-Oct-13 21:21:38

I'm on DC3 and can still do sneaky ones too princesspants, just a shame they smell like something has crawled up my backside and died (DHs words, not mine). I've been blaming it on the cat, which would work if we actually had a cat.

Poor DS (4yo) told me this morning "I can't look at you, you stink" after I trumped in bed. Maybe he'll decide to sleep in his own bed tonight now though grin He also accused me of "leaving a pump" in his bedroom (I didn't, 2yo DD had poo'd).

I get cramps holding them in at work too. I'm getting an expert at "popping to such-and-such department" for entirely made-up reasons and dropping sneaky ones in the stairwell or lift. I predict its only a matter of time until I get caught though blush

Wallison Sun 13-Oct-13 22:12:19

I have no idea what's happened to my arse either. I only had a second degree tear as well!

Sammi1986 Sun 13-Oct-13 23:45:35

Lol it's good to know I am not the only one, but I fear there is no hope for the future.
Tonight I have tried telling OH they are love puffs, and the more I love him the more they smell. He then promptly tucks the duvet around me as tightly as possible whilst threatening to shove a cork up my bum if I dare move.


PinkWitch803 Mon 14-Oct-13 06:14:20

Have you spoken to your pharmacist? There are some over the counter remedies available which might be ok for pregnant ladies.

The other alternative is charcoal biscuits! We used to feed them when he farted smile he used to fart, look at his bum, then wag his tail. But the smell was so bad we had to get advice.

I think it was something to do with the acidity levels and the charcoal that neutralised the gasess and I assume the sxme spplied for the OTC remedies. I think it is more alkalinea.

It didn't stop him farting and I still smile when I remember how chuffed he was, but it did stop the smell which made all the difference.

DoudousDoor Mon 14-Oct-13 06:33:11

One of my earliest pregnancy symptoms is farting and burping. (Before BFP!) Much to DH's disgust as he hardly does any (seriously). Fortunately they dont smell tho! I shall tell him to be grateful wink

I need to tho otherwise I get really uncomfortable. Work is not good for that.

After birth I can remember only having seconds warning that I needed a poo and running to get to the loo. It does get better tho and when my physio was getting me to do pelvic floor exercises she also made me do some to strengthen the other muscles (cant remember them tho - you'll have to google)

Sammi1986 Mon 14-Oct-13 18:02:48

Need to bloomin do something! Yes it is very uncomfortable trying to hold it in at work, I keep sneaking off to the loo but it stinks and we only have one unisex toilet to share! Eeep

Mum2be007 Wed 29-Jul-15 18:10:26

Cnmorgan13 Wed 29-Jul-15 18:37:50

Ha ha ha! This has cheered me up. I'm not alone! Lol for some weird reason doing it actually makes me feel better. The bloating however is not fun. More gas than baby lol

NoArmaniNoPunani Wed 29-Jul-15 18:45:37

Love puffs are fanny farts!

MissMartin10 Wed 29-Jul-15 18:45:44

omg! so funny grin the same dp has limited me to only being allowed to do 10 a day.. when i was at work i would walk and fart so the smell dispersed equally! haha

Florin Wed 29-Jul-15 18:53:06

I got these while pregnant. Our son is now 3 but he still talks about how truely awful they smelt it really was that bad. He complained I never left the room but I got no warning with them. Worst was when I was doing pregnancy yoga in a section where we all laid on the floor for a very quiet bit and suddenly I let rip with a very noisy smelly fart.
They did stop once I gave birth though.

geekymommy Wed 29-Jul-15 19:44:06

I felt like the Hindenburg- huge, full of gas, and potentially flammable- during my pregnancy.

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