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How to cope with having boobs?

(30 Posts)
purrpurr Mon 29-Jul-13 23:57:33

Pre-pregnancy I had two small, well-behaved and easy to contain boobs. I could quite happily wear PJs without a bra, safe in the knowledge that there would only be a demure and vaguely flattering hint of chest adornment through the fabric.

Post-pregnancy I have been left with what I can only think of as two slippers that start roughly at breast height and continue southward for a number of miles, culminating in the largest, um, nipples, I've ever seen. Not that I'm a nipple connoisseur or anything, but I had no idea they could become so big nor so... Obvious. You'd think I was cold all the time. I sleep in a sports bra now to keep these things relatively high up so I don't accidentally sit on them or something.

It's not good.

Does it get better? Do I have to start buying tops with in built support? I'm not used to having these... Things just hanging off me getting in the way of stuff. I feel like if I elbowed one of them it would bash into the other one and then they'd be off, ricocheting off each other like those things in offices, you know where you tap one silver ball against another and they go on like that independently all afternoon.

<cries> <hoists boobs>

CelticPromise Tue 30-Jul-13 00:07:31

Come over to the bra threads to make sure you have right size bra for starters grin

biscuit biscuit

purrpurr Tue 30-Jul-13 00:18:29

Oh I know I should but I'm scared sad I've never had to do the whole proper bra thing before, just aimed my ironing board chest at an A cup and got on with my day. Plus whenever I've been fitted properly for a bra it's been too tight, I don't want to be trussed up like a turkey.

Can't I just give them up for adoption?

countingmyblessings Tue 30-Jul-13 00:28:10

The best advice that I can give is to breastfeed.

<sings 'I'm just a milk machine'> to the tune of 'i'm just a love machine's.

God, I'm pissed, again.

Seriously your though boobs are making milk. They've evolved over a million or so years to do so.

<sighs... Boobs will soon devolve into moobs...>

SorrelForbes Tue 30-Jul-13 00:28:42

We won't truss you up I promise! wink

If you measure yourself as per the guidance here and post the results someone will help with suggesting sizes to try.

countingmyblessings Tue 30-Jul-13 00:30:04

Ha ha. Merry after two glasses of wine. Hic

LackaDAISYcal Tue 30-Jul-13 00:33:09


fantastic OP

I was just admiring photos of my younger self with aforementioned well behaved and easy to contain boobs this evening and then sobbing over the drooping great hunks of flesh that adorn my waist these days <sigh>

but agree that well upholstered foundation garments are your new breast friend grin

chattychattyboomba Tue 30-Jul-13 00:40:14

Hey OP... I feel your pain. I was shocked at the size my nipples got! (Or bath plugs as my aunt calls them!) hmm
I was an A/B cup- biggest I got was E. I had angry stretch marks.
What I can say is 2 years on- my nips are relatively back to normal!!!
My stretch marks are hardly visible (which at the time seemed impossible as they looked like I had been massacred)
My breasts are still a bit empty... I call them pixie shoes or banana boobs... You know how they go...nothing, nothing, nothing... Doink! Yeah...
BUT! They have improved massively and continue to do so!
Also- unrelated, I can now get my jeans undone before peeing my pants when I'm busting... Hooray! It only took 2 years of pelvic floor...
Anyhoo, HTH?

Thirstysomething Tue 30-Jul-13 00:44:01

Just sling them over your shoulder and get on with your day...
Remember the schoolyard song

Do your tits hang low?
Do they wobble to and fro?
Can you tie them in a knot, can you tie them in a bow?
Can you throw them over your shoulder, like a regimental soldier, Do your Tits Hang Looooooow????

I sympathise - I go from an A to a DD in pregnancy and on to an "F-me they're Huuuge" cup when breast feeding.
All my normal clothes are based on my usual figure of two buttons on an ironing board, so with tits I have no idea how to dress. I either look like a hooker, or a Matron with a huge uni-bosom in a polo neck.
Luckily, just as I am about to be arrested for my lack of fashion sense, I give up feeding the voracious monsters dc and I go back to flat.
Can't wait to wear all my lovely clothes again!!

purrpurr Tue 30-Jul-13 00:52:48

Oh you lovely lot have made me laugh. Thank god I'm not alone! And it's reassuring to note that they do improve but god, 2 years???? Noooo. I'll have accidentally blinded someone by then.

SourSweets Tue 30-Jul-13 04:33:20

Oh god, I haven't even started breastfeeding yet and I'm already an F. Forget waist, I'll be able to polish the floor with mine! It is reassuring to see its possible for them to go back to normal... Eventually.

bingeddybongo Tue 30-Jul-13 06:11:18

I have absolutely no advice at all, just wanted to let you know I'm in the club too: I've gone from having a fairly small and tidy round pair to a couple of dog's ears that slide over my belly like the clock in that Dali painting (adorned with nipples the size of saucers). And to think I genuinely thought I was simply going to sprout a pair of perky porn star boobs. What a massive disappointment. Are we going to get our old ones back?

purrpurr Tue 30-Jul-13 08:16:45

I too expected big porn star style boobs! Not these naan breads. Or even... Croissants. More like it.


JodiLeighLeigh Tue 30-Jul-13 11:57:25

As someone who was an H before pregnancy, I can assure you that practically anything is more discrete than my comedy-sized knockers now. They're enormous, and I'm only in very early pregnancy so they're only going to get bigger angry

Can't find anywhere that does even maternity bras big enough. Help!!

And they're sooooo sore! x

purrpurr Tue 30-Jul-13 14:08:02

Oh Jodi you poor thing! Sore boobs, I'd forgotten about that too. Pregnancy sucks!

christmasmum2b Tue 30-Jul-13 15:18:37

Wow, I wish I had that problem before!!! I have always big a 2f or 32FF. But now i'm 5 months i'm heading towards H cup. OMG I am going to look like Jordon. I hate them even more now. My sister keeps saying breast feeding will get rid of them!!!! Great that will leave me with udders!!!

Love them smile

christmasmum2b Tue 30-Jul-13 15:20:49

Snap Jodie. The woman in Debenhams was just plain awful!!!! she said" WHY THE HELL ARE YOU WEARING AN UNDERWIRED BRA" It will damage your baby!!! WTF I replied with I am 34ff do you what do you want me to wear!!!

My boobs are so sore too.

purrpurr Tue 30-Jul-13 15:41:10

Mum2b did you slap Debenhams woman and blame hormones? If not go back. Stupid cah. (Her not you!)

JodiLeighLeigh Tue 30-Jul-13 15:50:16

The woman in debenhams sounds lucky to be alive! She should try carrying several stone on her chest without scaffolding.

On a separate note RE breast feeding...could that be a logistical nightmare working on the assumption I don't want to smother the baby?! x

brightonbeachbaby14 Thu 01-Aug-13 20:14:50

I too have tiny little boobs and was quite excited about the prospect of having something there for once.... Not so sure now!

Writerwannabe83 Thu 01-Aug-13 20:27:34

Under wired bras harm the baby???

Littleen Thu 01-Aug-13 20:28:27

begging boobs not to grow scary stuff!

LostMySocks Thu 01-Aug-13 20:35:07

Underworked bras are fine if when pregant they are properly fitted and the wires are away from the boobs and milk ducts. I you wear wired you do need to get refitted more regularly to make sure bras fit. However if BF soft cup needed to accommodate change in size as you feed.

CelticPromise Thu 01-Aug-13 20:39:20

Underwired is ok bfing too, if fitted properly. Anita make underwired nursing bras.

itstooembarrassing Thu 01-Aug-13 23:36:52

Jodi and Christmasmum can I suggest to you. I'm a 36J pre-pregnancy and went to a 42K with my first pregnancy and Royce bras from them. They were really helpfully both via email and phone with helping me find the right size. I will def be getting bras from them this time too.

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