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(31 Posts)
BumpAndGrind Sun 16-Jun-13 15:49:25

I'm 13 weeks and I have had my scan, all seems well and I want to officially announce it, even though my closest friends and family already know.

I want to put my scan picture on facebook to let lesser seen friends and relatives know, but Mumsnet has scared me blush

You lot are always going on about how naff/chavvy or whatever it seems...or even insensitive.

Now I'm not sure....hmmmm.

HotSoupDumpling Tue 18-Jun-13 07:47:10

I'm the sort of person that tries very hard to make sure Facebook doesn't reflect my life completely... So wouldn't ever post scan photos (but have messaged or emailed them to friends who have asked for them). I've told most friends who I can't see face to face via messages or emails. I presume everyone else will be able to figure it out, if they are particularly sleuthy, from photos of me/comments from friends during the pregnancy.

MrsHY1 Mon 17-Jun-13 18:36:49

Really interesting one. I'm 16 wks with my first baby after three rounds of IVF. I know when I was going through everything I lived in abject fear of seeing Fbook updates and scan pics, but then I am in the minority and those were my issues/feelings, not those of my friends who quite rightly wanted to spread their joy! Now things have gone my way I've decided to message a few people but not do the scan pic thing, just in case someone I'm friends with is going through a similar experience.

MrsHY1 Mon 17-Jun-13 18:29:07

Really interesting one. I'm 16 wks with my first baby after three rounds of IVF. I know when I was going through everything I lived in abject fear of seeing Fbook updates and scan pics, but then I am in the minority and those were my issues/feelings, not those of my friends who quite rightly wanted to spread their joy! Now things have gone my way I've decided to message a few people but not do the scan pic thing, just in case someone I'm friends with is going through a similar experience.

MrsGSR Mon 17-Jun-13 18:22:14

I'm not putting scan photos up as I want to keep them private (although I may add them to a private family group we have on Facebook due to being all over the world) but I am going to announce it on there after telling close friends and family. I saw a picture of something (on pinterest!) similar to what trudy did and love the idea of it!

Franykins Mon 17-Jun-13 11:54:46

We announced on FB after our 12 week scan, that dated me at 12+5 with twins! We took DP 2 boys from his previous relationship out to dinner first though and told them. Close family and friends already knew but the rest didn't. We didn't put scan pics up for same reasons as other posters have said, its personal and could upset some. Having said that DP and I rarely put statues or photo's on FB anyway. However announcing twins on there it all went mad! Then my sister did a status about it and I had her friends (some I don't know) asking personal questions, some which upset me about due date as they are bound to come early and I feel even more protective than I already did and to be honest I wanted to tell all the f off! All my friends know how long I've waited to start my own family so were very excited for me, to be honest though I ended up not liking all the attention and in a way regretted putting it up. I have not posted since about anything (not just pg related) but my DP and I only post a couple of times a year anyway. Am now 16+3, and I just talk to my close family and friends about it.

It's up to each individual though and we wanted to let family and friends that live far away (some abroad) and we don't see that often know.

Congratulations by the way!

BraveLilBear Mon 17-Jun-13 11:26:55

Congrats on your pregnancy! I have never 'officially' announced on facebook, but some of my statuses reference it occasionally in a subtle way, which means that people are now only just finding out (am 35 weeks)!

I didn't want to share the photo for the same reason as above - I remember seeing dozens of annoucnements and photos after an early miscarriage and found it devastating, the pictures were definitely the worst to see.

I emailed family and PM'd a few close friends with the picture, but otherwise, I'm very happy to have kept this offline - there is an inherent privacy thing at play, too (read Blind Faith by Ben Elton and your opinion on Facebook etc may change!).

Something one of my friends did was create a closed special interest page on Facebook, which if people liked, they could see photos and updates etc. I loved the sensitivity of this, to the extent that it didn't upset me at all.

Another cute way of announcing was a picture of a Belgian bun... in an oven. Definitely better than a scan pic in my opinion.

FobblyWoof Mon 17-Jun-13 10:16:31

I announced it on Facebook but didn't put a scan picture up. It's only my view but it was the first ever picture of my DD and it felt very personal for me and wasn't something I wanted to put online, though I'd happily show anyone who wanted to see it.

But some people aren't so precious concerned about all that. Depends on you really. I had a friend announce her pregnancy a few days ago with a bun in the oven picture which was cute

weebarra Mon 17-Jun-13 08:55:04

I didn't announce DC3 on facebook. I have friends who have fertility issues and a close friend who had a stillbirth last year so I thought it would be insensitive.
Also DS2 has a congenital heart defect which increases the chance of it happening to subsequent children, so I'm not making announcements until baby is here!

kelda Mon 17-Jun-13 08:49:44

ch1134 I agree. There is something very private about a scan photo. It feels almost intrusive on the baby at their most vulnerable. I have just seen a scan photo on facebook clearly showing the little boy 'bits' with many comments following. I find that very tasteless and possibly embarrassing for that child in future years.

Also, although I'm sure most people will be very happy for you, not many of them will be interested in the scan photo. In fact, most scan photos are not clear enough to see anything much of interest anyway.

A few people who have had miscarriages and who are finding it difficult to concieve may be upset by a scan photo.

I have no objection to people annoucing their pregnancies on facebook; it's jsut the scan photos that I have a problem with.

Littleturkish Mon 17-Jun-13 08:49:33

I announced at 38 weeks with my profile photo of me with a huge bump. I never put my scan photo up (though I did show it to people) and shared it on a private 'due in' group.

I felt superstitious about it and didn't have a great pregnancy health wise, so just didn't want to have to announce a miscarriage or cope with questions about 'when is the baby due' if I had miscarried.

I also have a lot of friends TTC or with fertility issues, or longing for a baby with no long term partner. Baby announcements aren't happy for everyone.

Kelly1814 Mon 17-Jun-13 08:41:03

i don't think it's chavvy, however i can think of nothing worse (for me personally) than sharing a scan photo on facebook.

i'm very private (24 weeks and only close friends and family know) and really don't subscribe to these huge social media brodcasts that now seem t be the norm.

i've emailed the scan photo to a very select few.

ch1134 Sun 16-Jun-13 20:27:11

For what it's worth, I disagree with the majority. It is up to you, but I think a scan picture is a private thing - you are choosing to share something very intimate about someone you care about very much (your baby) without its consent, with the world wide web. I'd think carefully about that.

Newmum0113 Sun 16-Jun-13 18:23:04

igirisu I was shy at first too! I remember telling my mum dad and aunt at the same time and thinking "oh my gosh. Now my dad knows I've had sex!"

Of course he knows - I'm 25 and have been married for 2 years!


igirisu Sun 16-Jun-13 18:04:37

Announce it however you want! Using Facebook isn't chavvy at all, Infact I think judging people on how they announce such lovely news says a lot about someone's character wink I couldn't bare to tell anyone as I'm so shy so I had to send a text to my family! Imagine that! They still all laugh about it now grin

Applepiesky Sun 16-Jun-13 17:43:28

I did it! My dp was sceptical about me doing it but then was so glad we did!! It reached out to our friends who live away or those that we aren't in regular contact with and it was so lovely to have everyone's support and congratulations! Made us feel very emotional. I would recommend it :-)

Dackyduddles Sun 16-Jun-13 17:35:07

Do it! Your friends and family will love it and its them that's VIP not bunch of nameless here.


whiterose2011 Sun 16-Jun-13 17:32:36

BumpAndGrind, I am exactly the same as you. We just told our families this weekend and I'm terrified that its going to jinx things. I had a mc last year so feeling v nervous about this pregnancy. I wish I didn't feel like this but I don't think it's unusual when you've had a loss.

I think you should do what is right for you. As others say, it's your baby and your body - who cares if people think its tacky (just for the record, I don't think that!!) - do what makes you feel comfortable. Enjoy being made a fuss of when you do finally announce it! Xx

Excited85 Sun 16-Jun-13 16:48:58

I put our scan pic on Facebook after 20 week scan. Close friends and family knew but we both have moved around a lot and so it seemed the easiest way to let people know. I was going to try hold off until we'd had the baby however knew some extended family and uni friends etc would feel a bit miffed we hadn't said! Plus I didn't fancy making loads of different phone calls to them all!
If you want to put it on you do it. Don't worry about people thinking its naff - surely it better than explaining to people one by one which if you have plenty of friends an family is a far bigger job x

Anothermrssmith Sun 16-Jun-13 16:43:42

interesting thread, my scan is on Wednesday and as long as everything is ok I don't think I'll be able to hold in any longer, I was thinking text/phonecall to our close friends and facebook status a few hours later to catch everyone else. Some may think it's chavvy but there are a lot of people I talk to fairly often on facebook but that I don't have numbers for to let them know any other way. To hell with everyone else, just do what works for you.

jessw25 Sun 16-Jun-13 16:41:39

Your pregnancy so you do what you feel is right.

DH announced it on his FB (tagging me in so my friends could see) after successful 12wk scan. I waited till 20 wk scan was also good until I mentioned it on my own status. Silly of me really as my friends could all see it from his but I didn't want to jinx things by mentioning it on mine till the other scan. Same with buying baby things, DH wanted to buy EVERYTHING after 12 wk scan, I had to really convince him to hold off till after 20!

If you have a good friend who is ttc at the mo just do like the other poster suggested, send a private message or like I did with a good friend, call them before anything appears in FB

Congratulations! x

Lydia161290 Sun 16-Jun-13 16:41:31

I only have family and friends on my Facebook anyway. But the likes of my parents, who live over in Ireland, were over the moon when I put my scan pictures on Facebook so they could see. It's just an easier way for me to communicate with them. It should be your decision. Yeah, people have opinions about it, but quite honestly, I don't see what the huge fuss is about. Especially if your Facebook is private like mine and you only have people you know on there!

cogitosum Sun 16-Jun-13 16:22:14

I put it as my status but didn't put the picture up as ilafter I had a mmc I was devestated every time I saw a scan picture. Even when I had my scan which was fine this time round I feel funny about the pictures- it brought it all flooding back so I wouldn't risk my picture upsetting someone else.

Having said that I know it's my issue and you should do what works for you. (but I think comments about people should just delete you if they don't like it are a bit harsh. I wouldn't delete someone but it would've upset me at that point but wouldn't be their fault)

Iwish Sun 16-Jun-13 16:18:33

Ill be putting it on FB too after my scan. We have friends and family in other parts of the uk and also in Australia so it's nice that they all get to know too. Xx

pumpkinsweetie Sun 16-Jun-13 16:01:19

Lovely way of announcing it Trudy, really sweetsmile

pumpkinsweetie Sun 16-Jun-13 16:00:00

That's what i'm doing after my next scan, was only 10.6weeks at my dating scan, thought i was 12. Once i have my proper 12wk+ scan, it's going on fb. I don't see a problem with it, if others don't like it they can delete megrin

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