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Who has a glass of wine? No bashing please

(187 Posts)
Mamabear12 Sun 05-May-13 14:09:21

I have a glass of wine once a week. A small glass and I feel guilty about this. Although, the midwife said this is fine. With my first I had a glass prob once a month. I was more strict. Also, this time around I have coffee (one cup made at home) every other day. I feel guilty about that as well.

Please list how often you drink either wine or coffee. If you don't drink either at all, no need to post please.

harleyd Tue 07-May-13 14:20:11

i found out i was pregnant after a VERY boozy weeks holiday in the canaries.
im now 23 weeks, i have a couple of shandys or a pint of cider once a week when we go to the bar.
i drink coffee every day, but have cut down from about 8 cups, to 2

rrreow Tue 07-May-13 14:43:39

I drink wine (or a beer) when I feel like it but no more than once a week and never more than about 1 unit. At the moment it's probably once every 2-3 weeks, but around Christmas time I definitely enjoyed up to the NHS guidelines.

I drink decaf as I can't really tolerate the amount of caffeine in a cup of coffee, even when not pregnant!

I don't feel guilty about the above, nor do I think I should, nor do I think you should feel guilty about your choices. It sounds like your choices are informed and responsible.

MummyJetsetter Tue 07-May-13 14:48:03

Hi, in my 1st pregnancy I had a glass of wine every night, and a can of coke every morning. Also when I was on holiday for a week I had a glass with my lunch and one with my evening meal.

I am 17 weeks in to my second pregnancy and I have just started drinking a glass on Friday amd Saturday nights and one with Sunday dinner. I didn't before the last couple of weeks because my appetite for food and drink was non existent so I didn't have much of anything. I still have a can of coke in the morning and I have a cup of tea most afternoons.

In my first pregnancy I really didn't read anything about alcohol so I just thought a glass a night was fine. My son is absolutely unaffected by it. I do think it's only really excessive drinking that causes problems. I've read things saying that 1 drink in the whole pregnancy can cause problems. It that's scaremongering if ever I heard it!

I wouldn't feel guilty, you're not being excessive at all and I think a glass of wine when you put your child to bed is great sanity maintenance!

Featherbag that's a great argument by the way!


Shellington Tue 07-May-13 14:50:25

I have had half a bottle of wine in the past ... <totting up>... five-ish years. (In the gap between stopping BF DC1 and getting PG with DC2 - whom I still BF).

Through that I've had one normal tea a day, 2-3 decaff, no coffee but a coke/ some chocolate probably 2-3 times a week and zero alcohol. Am not guilt-driven with any of the above, just my preference.

TravelHappy Tue 07-May-13 17:04:40

ChangeNameToday - I'm sorry to hijack but I'm interested to know more about drinking (caffine or alcohol) when breastfeeding. Is there something in the timing such as drinking straight after a feed or is it just being sensible with amounts?

OP - I have a cup of coffee most days and after 20 weeks (I had a wobble at 16/17) I've really enjoyed my one sensible sized glass of wine a week. I have alternated with low alcohol cider from Sainsburys which I find nice too.

MummyBurrows Tue 07-May-13 17:56:22

I don't drink wine or coffee,have never liked either. But fwiw I'm 17wks and so far I've had a strong cup of tea every morning and will continue to do so,its the only one I have all day,not because I'm worried about caffine intake,just because 1 is enough for me. I don't drink in general and haven't in 5yrs now but I do have a small glass of something over xmas,newyear and the occassional shandy in the summer and no doubt I will again this summer even though I'm going to spend all summer pregnant. Also,I developed a massive craving for coca-cola (full fat,not diet) when pregnant first time around and I was consuming well over the RDA of caffine-i mean easily having between 6-10cans a day!-and I was around the 25-30wks mark and while I know I shouldn't have done it,I simply couldn't help myself,and my DD came out perfect-both looks,colour and weight wise and no problems whatsoever,I'm not condoning it and saying everyone should do the same,I'm just saying in my case it did no harm/damage to my baby.

I think having a cup of coffee or 2 a day and having the odd glass of wine a week won't do any harm,especially if within the guidelines. I think its more about what other people may think and various guidelines that produce the guilt that comes with having a little drink,alcoholic or caffinated but unless its done to extremes throughout pregnancy I don't think it does much,if any,harm. As they say "a little bit of what you fancy does you good" smile

ChangeNameToday Tue 07-May-13 19:37:51

Hi TravelHappy. I bf'd for a long time and, obviously, over time you are feeding gradually less often. At the start I would wait till after a feed to have a drink, then it has time to pass through your system. Of course, unless you are following done crazy rigid feeding plan, you should be feeding on demand so there's bound to be an occasion where you've had a glass of wine and unexpectedly baby needs attending to.

ChangeNameToday Tue 07-May-13 19:40:51

Oops, posted too soon. Was going to add that I didn't drink like a fish or anything, was certainly never "drunk", it was just a glass here and there but it didn't seem to bother DS on the occasion (rare) that I might have just put my glass down and run into him. Who knows? Perhaps it helped!

But yes, in general, you shouldn't drink much and should time it for after a feed.


Karoleann Tue 07-May-13 21:46:52

Seems fine! Decent journal too.

I had 2 glasses twice a week with all three of mine. First two were born before the caffeine recommendations too, so just drunk coffee and coke as usual.

Like most things, moderation is the key.

TheCatIsUpTheDuff Tue 07-May-13 22:03:19

I had a pint of 3.4% mild at 14 weeks and two glasses of champagne at 16 weeks - not on the same night. I feel no guilt at all about the occasional drink.

I usually drink decaf tea and coffee, so really it's only if I'm having coffee out that it's an issue, so probably 2/3 cups of caffeinated tea or coffee a week. I probably have a can of Diet Coke every other day, and quite possibly make up the rest of my caffeine allowance in chocolate!

MummyJetsetter Wed 08-May-13 08:12:16

With regards to breastfeeding I drank quite a lot and did it, I would express the 10.30 pm bottle earlier in the day but the 2 am feed I would just do. I did it drunk on the odd occasion too. I was under the impression having researched that very little alcohol got in to the milk but rather it just affected the taste of it. My ds didn't seem to mind. x

VisualiseAHorse Wed 08-May-13 09:20:21

A friend told me she had a glass of wine everyday during her last pregnancy (and she was a 'mature' mum at 45!).

I drank - not a lot, and certainly got everyday. But then, I also ate runny eggs, pate, soft cheese, raw milk etc, clearly I'm an awful mother.

Just be sensible.

pictish Wed 08-May-13 09:21:51

I do!
Slange! {grin]

VisualiseAHorse Wed 08-May-13 09:23:20

With regards to BF - again, I never drank much (I'm not a big drinker by any means anyway, even now not pregnant or BF and I might have 1-2 drinks a week).

Featherbag Wed 08-May-13 09:23:36

The change in guidance from 1-2 units once or twice a week to none at all wasn't based on any new research by the way, it was just decided to change it as too many women interpreted this as 'well, if 1 or 2 is ok, 5 or 6 will be too'. There is far more evidence to say a little alcohol in pregnancy is either harmless or beneficial than there is which proves it harmful.

Sparhawk Wed 08-May-13 09:34:12

I worked with a young girl with FAS, I didn't touch a drop when pregnant with DD it's absolutely not worth the risk.

VisualiseAHorse Wed 08-May-13 09:37:27

Yup, it's alot easier to just say 'no alcohol at all' rather than nit-pick about units and amounts - as a lot of people don't really know what a 'unit' consists of any way.

Guidlines may say 1-2 units which I know is one small glass of wine (125mls), but others may think 1 unit = 1 glass of wine filled all the way up which could be up to 250 mls. And if 1 unit = 1 glass they might have two glasses, which means they may drink up to 500mls, whereas I would only drink 125mls. Big differences, so it's a lot easier to just say don't drink it at all.

KirjavaTheCat Wed 08-May-13 09:45:41

I'm not, though I wasn't much of a drinker before though, so it's not like I'm giving up anything tbh.

My mother-in-law drank a bottle of wine a day with her now 4yo DD, and amazingly she was born healthy and is a smart, lovely little girl. And then you read about mothers who binge drink when they don't know they're pregnant and give birth to babies with FAS or FAE, even if they're tee-total from getting their positive pregnancy test.

shufflehopstep Wed 08-May-13 09:53:37

Just adding to the comments on bf and drinking. The alcohol is in your milk for the same length of time as your blood so 1 unit takes an hour to leave your system. Studies have shown that babies seem not to like the taste of alcohol so will take less milk or be fussy. This was certainly the case with my daughter and so she generally wanted feeding sooner. I found it easier to try to express in advance if I was going to have more than one drink and that gave me a bit longer for it to get out of my system.

sarahtigh Wed 08-May-13 09:53:50

it may be easier but it is not scientific or evidence based

I hate the attitude that pregnant women are particularly stupid regarding alcohol and what a unit is ( they are no more stupid about this than general population) about food smoking drugs etc etc etc

I would think a leaflet that said the following have been proved scientifically to potentially harm your baby

1. smoking
2. excess vitamin A from liver etc so avoid pate/ liver etc
3, excess alcohol especially in form of binge drinking or daily use
4. excess caffeine termed as ( more than 4 cups instrant coffee or 2 espressos or what ever exact number is

these may harm your baby not because of the food itself being harmful but because these types of food are more likely to cause food poisoning eg seafood, blue cheese, soft or raw eggs etc

and so on in this style

including positive things which are proved to help like folic acid and iron in cases of deficieny

the following may be helpful in helping with labour and recovery

I think people should know whether guidelines are based on hard facts ( like NICE) or a sound bite to make it "easier" which unfortunately NHS guidelines are in many fields not just pregnancy

cerealqueen Wed 08-May-13 10:49:18

Generally, did not drink in pregnancy, one glass of wine on birthday. Guilt and worry that I'd want more than 1/2 kept me off it.

I drank 2/3 cups of normal tea every day and had 9lb babies.

I have drunk wine and I am breastfeeding. Never to drunk though., max, three small glasses after a mea.

Bumpsadaisie Wed 08-May-13 11:17:56

Goodness me I don't think you need to be feeling guilty!

In the first three months with mine I didn't drink caffeine, as the taste made me heave. Couldnt stomach alcohol either at that point, I had pretty bad sickness with them both and lived on coke and sherbert lemons and a few crackers.

After the first trimester I felt much better. I probably had three cups of tea/coffee a day. I also had half of a small glass (you know, the round goblet kind you get at church fetes, etc) of red wine, with my supper, EVERY night without fail. It was something to look forward to in what otherwise was rather a slog.

DCs are fine. In fact they are hale and healthy and showing signs of great intelligence! grin

If I were to do it again, assuming I even felt like drinking it, I would avoid alcohol in the first tri. Other than that I would do the same again.

TravelHappy Wed 08-May-13 11:25:55

Thanks to ChangeName and others for their experiences of breastfeeding. I was an enthusiastic drinker before getting pregnant but I really wouldn't be having even the one glass if I honestly thought it was doing any damage and I'll take a similar approach to breastfeeding even if that means abstaining for a few months.

mmmerangue Wed 08-May-13 11:36:16

I drank tea like it was water, started taking sugar in it too.

I was graduating Uni before I found out, so in v. early stages I had a LOT to drink. Yes I feel guilty about it - but wasn't to know and thankfully have a healthy 2 year old now.

I probably had 3 alcoholic drinks during my pregnancy after I found out - each one made me violently sick and I still can't drink red wine (think I developed an allergy, but haven't been tested, just avoid it now).

pumpkinsweetie Wed 08-May-13 11:42:27

I am not one to comment as i enjoy my cups of coffee although i know caffeine intake should be kept to the bare minimum but its something i enjoy and have done with all my pregnancies which par from one turned out healthy. But i have cut down massively and try my best to drink juice or tea the majority of the day as that has less caffeine.
As for alcohol it isn't a risk im willing to take as a regular thing, only maybe if there was a celebration and even then probably only a small one.
I think drinking and smoking in pregnancy isn't worth the risk and the damage it may or may not cause isn't worth it Imo.

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