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Who has a glass of wine? No bashing please

(187 Posts)
Mamabear12 Sun 05-May-13 14:09:21

I have a glass of wine once a week. A small glass and I feel guilty about this. Although, the midwife said this is fine. With my first I had a glass prob once a month. I was more strict. Also, this time around I have coffee (one cup made at home) every other day. I feel guilty about that as well.

Please list how often you drink either wine or coffee. If you don't drink either at all, no need to post please.

TondelayoSchwarzkopf Sun 05-May-13 15:02:42

I agree with yousankmybattleship - why do it if you feel guilty?

FWIW your caffeine consumption is well within the very precautionary NHS guidelines and there has never been any evidence to show very light drinking in pregnancy is harmful (1 to 2 units, once or twice a week) so I really am not getting the guilt confused

High caffeine consumption is considered a strong risk factor in first trimester miscarriage - that is the main reason for the guidelines and why women trying to conceive are also advises to cut it down. Drinking a lot of tea interferes with iron absorption though IIRC that is not caffeine related. After 3 months I would be more concerned about tea intake rather than coffee.

javabean Sun 05-May-13 15:07:12

I'm about 30 weeks pg and have coffee almost every day - normally one cup but sometimes 2 - but then I also have a toddler so sometimes need the energy boost! I occasionally drink a small glass of wine, but not that often due to falling asleep around 9pm smile also eat runny eggs and cheese that I'm not supposed to.

In my first pregnancy I looked at some of the studies and figures the advice was based on, and came to the conclusion that the risks were tiny.

TondelayoSchwarzkopf Sun 05-May-13 15:10:51

Yeah, what ChangeNameToday said. I am always puzzled by people who follow the guidelines without asking why or doing their own research. Also the NHS guidelines are mostly pretty sensible and liberal but there are so many people who have been to the university of google and claim you can't eat or drink x or y because some random woo site said so.

Essexgirlupnorth Sun 05-May-13 15:15:48

I'm 18 weeks and have had two glasses of wine during the whole pregnancy. Just worried if I have a glass regularly I will want more than one.
I don't drink tea or coffee anyway because I don't like them. Have had the odd coke though.

KingRollo Sun 05-May-13 15:31:22

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

badguider Sun 05-May-13 15:33:24

KingRollo - there is no recommended limit for alcohol. It is zero by the nhs guidelines.
I think the guilt many people feel comes from going knowingly against that guidance.

[for anybody who doesn't know, it's 200mg a day for caffeine]

ChangeNameToday Sun 05-May-13 15:39:50

badguider, doesn't the NHS say one or two units once or twice a week? And they only say that to get through to the thickos. It's ike with drinking and driving. There actually is a safe limit but they don't encourage it because a lot of people are too stupid to stick to it, so they say no alcohol at all.

Teaandflapjacks Sun 05-May-13 16:11:20

I also am confused why post this, then say 'If you don't drink either at all, no need to post please.' - it almost sounds like data gathering....! hmm

Badguider is spot on - there is no 'safe' limit with alcohol - it is a toxin. There are lots of new studies coming out about the effects of alcohol on foetuses. Change - both my sister and BIL are doctors, and the alcohol guidelines are nothing to do with stupid people not sticking to it - they know now that occasionally the alcohol effects the developing foetus in an adverse way, and you are welcome to google the latest research on the topic. This is why they now say - none is 'safe'. You could be really unlucky and drink at a critical point, and then have an issues later - since alcohol crosses the placenta. If you 'must' then very little - say the guidelines. People used to smoke when pg too not that long ago. They can't do loads of research truly into it either. here:-

'If women want to avoid all possible alcohol-related risks, they should not drink alcohol during pregnancy because the evidence on this is limited.'

re. caffeine. The risk actually is to do with the babies birth weight. Now being sensible about caffeine - and having a couple of cups of tea (not buiklders strength) etc is fine they think - just don't go knocking back loads of the stuff. But you never know this may also change. I personally hate coffee now, and have the odd cup of normal tea, but mainly caffeine free tea.

Personally I drink - it is nine months, why on earth is it that hard to just not have a drink.

here is some more food for thought - and I live in germany and they are also very against it here now, based on new research, and it really is actively discouraged. And no - I do not think for a moment they are trying to 'control' me - just protect me and my baby from future complications.

How does alcohol affect my unborn baby?

If you drink alcohol when you’re pregnant, the alcohol crosses the placenta into the bloodstream of the unborn baby and could interfere with how it grows and develops. In the absence of its own blood filtering system, the foetus is unprotected from any alcohol molecules that cross from the mother’s blood.
Alcohol can cause damage to an unborn baby at all stages of pregnancy. Drinking during pregnancy has been associated with:
miscarriage (over 9,000 women are admitted to hospital every year for miscarriages caused by alcohol [NHS Information Centre Hospital Admission data])
low birth weight
heart defects
learning and behavioural disorders

Teaandflapjacks Sun 05-May-13 16:12:29

gah - meant to say 'personally I DONT drink' confused oh dear!

pinkteapot Sun 05-May-13 16:34:31

I have had a glass or two of wine now and then during all 4 pregnancies, and drink a couple of coffees and teas a day. But then I dont get too wrapped up in nhs guidelines, just try to eat snd drink sensibly.

however one persons 'i did this and baby is fine / not fine' isn't evidence either way as there are so many other unknown factors in each case, from genetics to other lifestyle choices.

personally OP I certainly wouldnt feel bad about your intake level. but you will get those who say otherwise too and cite research or lack of research as reason to avoid a long list of food and drink.

IMHO, just be sensible and enjoy your pregnancy!

Teaandflapjacks Sun 05-May-13 16:42:44

I should also add - I have severe MS - at 26 weeks it is a case of eating like a child to avoid throwing up. So for me it is no temptation at all. It easy very easy for me to be a bit high and mighty blush then - if i had no MS i expect it would be a very different story, since normally I just love wine. i really cant wait to give birth, and then drink a bottle of the stuff - and will be expressing or mixed feeding to allow me to do this. My doctor said that worrying is worse - too much stress hormone etc for the baby, than most of the 'forbidden' things themselves (in moderation) etc. and also told me to stop looking at google. blush mmm. hormones a bit mad today, enjoy your vino ladies - apologies for sounding a bit off. shock xx

ElBombero Sun 05-May-13 17:04:22

Hi no alcohol in 1st trimester, just because of risk. Since been having 2-3 small glasses a week on separate intervals. Always have one coffee in morning and then for rest of day drink decaf tea / coffee. Lost the ability to enjoy water??? N used to religiously drink 2l a day

rowtunda Sun 05-May-13 17:08:07

I cut alcohol out until 5 month in my first pregnancy, but I've found it much harder second time round. I have 1-2 small glasses of wine a week. I don't feel guilty about it at all as it is not excessive drinking and is within guidance.

Sometimes it is just the thought of it which I like - pour one out & then don't bother to drink it!

Ragwort Sun 05-May-13 17:17:04

I didn't drink for the first few weeks - because I genuinely went off alcohol and I didn't know I was pregnant grin but yes, I drank a glass of wine (large) twice a week or so for most of my pregnancy, and when breast feeding. I certainly didn't give up coffee - and I drink 5-6 mugs of strong coffee a day grin.

I didn't feel guilty at all. I personally believe that the 'advice' not to drink at all is geared towards very heavy drinkers who probably don't listen to it anyway.

My MIL was a midwife, she drank (gin) and smoked her way through her pregnancies grin.

You have to make your own decision, there will be lots of people for whom drinking is something they woud never, ever consider when pregnant; some people will be affected, some won't.

ElBombero Sun 05-May-13 17:25:51

Well said namechangetoday

crazyhead Sun 05-May-13 17:50:08

Based on last pregnancy and now starting the second trimester of this, I drink around a glass of wine a week, and generally a cup of proper coffee. I see no reason to feel guilty. I felt too sick to drink in the first trimester, but have now started to have the odd glass.

The NHS guidelines on alcohol are based on the precautionary principle (if you tell women they can have a glass of wine, they'll read that as a bottle) not on evidence of harm. Personally, I find this irritating. There was an embarrassing conflict a few years ago between NICE guidelines on alcohol intake (evidence based) and NHS guidelines for this reason.

Other posters are right that it probably isn't worth doing something that is making you feel guilty - however, I do think that being pregnant, especially for the first time is odd, because it is as though suddenly your body stops being just yours and you feel as though you have to be perfect. Personally I'm happy to stick with good enough.

DXBMermaid Sun 05-May-13 17:50:32

I just had a beer and it was the best beer I have ever had in my life!

Haven't had a drink for months!

ReikiMummy Sun 05-May-13 18:50:46

Coffee.... 1 "mug" with just under half a spoon of coffee and milk... always in a morning, sometimes about 5pm too.

Alcohol not too fussed about but then i wasn't fussed about it before getting pg. Will have a sip of OH's wine if he has one at my parents with tea etc... just a sneaky share of guinness now and then... nom!

tequilacream Sun 05-May-13 20:42:52

It seems more about development of the child rather than extremes like Foetal Alcohol Syndrome. Article on BBC -

BabyHMummy Sun 05-May-13 21:14:35

I have been virtually tee-total due to meds for the last 3 years so am used to not drinking but it is hard when out for dinner or at some big family celebrations not to have the odd drink. I am not a massive wine fan or would probably still have the odd glass even though am pg but as i tend to drink vodka or Tia Maria i havee avoided completely although don't see that the odd drink does any harm

OrbisNonSufficit Sun 05-May-13 21:44:42

I have a coffee every day. Life really doesn't bear thinking about without caffeine! No alcohol at the moment as I'm in the first trimester, but I'm not planning to abstain completely for the second and third...

Christelle2207 Sun 05-May-13 22:41:09

I have one (caf) coffee and one tea a day - that's well within the cafferine guidelines. I also have a couple of decafs a day.

On a more naughty note I am enjoying 1-2 small glasses of wine a week. I drank hardly at all during the first trimester though. Currently 27 weeks.

Fairydogmother Sun 05-May-13 22:43:15

I've completely gone off tea tho I'm having the very occasional espresso. I'm 14 weeks now.

I normally LOVE wine but I've had no desire to have any. I tried a sip of a very good wine that my DP was having and I thought it tasted like utter crap! Actually I'm glad it does as it solves any problem of me worrying about wanting a glass.

I do like Bavaria zero beer tho its massively fizzy lol

atrcts Sun 05-May-13 22:45:31

In my first pregnancy the advice was to drink maximum of 2 units a week - which I did. This pregnancy the advice has changed due to new research and so I haven't dared touch it!

Coffee - I also switched to decaf, but more to avoid withdrawal headaches when i had pregnancy sickness and tea/coffee made me feel sick!

If i am out having coffee at someone else's house I will take a normal coffee, or even a coke, so I probably drink a caffeinated drink or two, once every 3 days or so. I har to har a fix of coke (cola!!) sometimes to give me energy to deal with my toddler while I lug this fat belly around all day!!!!

JollyOrangeGiant Sun 05-May-13 22:48:51

Most days I have no coffees. Occasionally I've had three cups of fairly weak coffee.

I've had a couple of sips of beer so far this time, but that's all. We are off on holiday when I'm 32 weeks and I'll maybe have a couple of half shandies then. I don't miss it though.

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