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Keeping toddler in nursery when new baby comes

(23 Posts)
PenelopeLane Tue 23-Apr-13 12:13:24

I am due in early Oct, and was wondering if anyone else is thinking of doing this, or done this in the past, and if it's been a good decision? So not to drip feed DS is currently in 3 days a week and likes it there, and if we were to keep him in it would be for two days a week 9 - 3.30 ish. When I return to work after a year, the idea is that he'll stay in the same nursery and increase to 3 days again. He'll be 2 when new baby comes.

We can afford it, but it would certainly be at the expense of other things (like holidays), so a tough decision to make.

Does anyone else have experience doing this, or thinking of doing the same? I note I am also aware that this isn't even an option for many, so am very lucky to have this choice at all.

BabyHMummy Tue 23-Apr-13 12:16:28

I am pg with dd1 so have no rl experience of my own but having been involved closely with my best mates 2 i would say keeping his routine as normal as possible is probably for the best. If you can afford to do it then i would carry on as normal. His life will change enough as it is when the baby arrives!

nextphase Tue 23-Apr-13 12:18:32

Yep, we did it.
use the childcare vouchers that DH kept claiming, and I kept as part of my maternity. We still have vouchers left over at the end of the year, which made the first couple fo months of 2 in full time childcare a bit easier!
It also kept his space at nursery, and meant DS2 got in.
We changed from 5 days to 2 mornings. Good for all of us! Occasionally when DH was travelling, I up'd his time to a full day to allow me to sleep with the baby.....

Twinklestarstwinklestars Tue 23-Apr-13 12:21:09

I would keep him going for at least one day a week to give you a break too, at least you can go back to bed or go to appointments etc if you need to.

My ds will be 3.5 when dc3 arrives but he already gets his 15 hours funding so I'm lucky so he will keep going 2.5 days a week, this is the school pre school though where he will go next year so would never pull him out anyway. I'm due just before the summer hols so bad timing as ds1 & 2 will be off for 6 weeks but at least I'll get time to myself in sept.

DaveMccave Tue 23-Apr-13 12:31:15

No, he's only a baby himself at 2, and those are long hours at that age. If You want to keep him used to the setting I'd consider one morning/afternoon a week when you can take the baby swimming or something you can't do with him. But 2 full days at 2 when you are at home for a year sounds unfair to me. The nursery run itself is an unnecessary hassle.

LoganMummy Tue 23-Apr-13 12:37:34

DC 2 is due in six weeks and we're planning on keeping DS in nursery two days a week. Same reasons as above - he loves nursery, will keep him in routine, will keep his place for when I go back to work and will also help me when DH is at work.

littlemonkeychops Tue 23-Apr-13 12:57:45

I'm keeping DD in 1.5 days when DC2 arrives in 5 weeks (dropping from 2.5). I disagree it's unfair to keep sending her, she loves it and knows the routine, i think it would be more unfair to expect her to adjust to a routine that will consist of life revolving around a newborn (at least for first few months). Looking forward to 1.5 days of cuddling in bed with baby while i know she's off having fun. Very true that we're lucky to afford it though.

rrreow Tue 23-Apr-13 15:21:59

Yes we're planning to do it, but I'm not really going to have maternity leave as such (DH and I run our own company, from home - so I'm just going to do what I can work-wise around DC2's needs) so it's practically necessary to have childcare for DS1. Even if it wasn't though I don't think I'd take him out of nursery unless we couldn't afford to keep him there. He loves going, gets a lot out of it and I wouldn't want to upset his routine.

TiredFeet Tue 23-Apr-13 15:34:05

I am planning to keep DS in, probably 2-3 mornings a week. He will be three when baby arrives. I think the socialising and activities are so good for him, and he calls it his 'other home' smile . I understand from the employment board that if you get vouchers as part of salary then they have to keep paying them throughout mat leave, so I am relying on vouchers plus, when they kick in, his 'free' nursery hours. I think it will be important for continuity too, otherwise he would have to settle in all over again when I went back to work

Mutley77 Tue 23-Apr-13 15:45:10

I would do it - but not at the expense of holidays!! I think for us family holidays became more important after the arrival of DC2 as things are generally busier and family time is more difficult to protect - therefore IMO holidays are an "essential". However I would carry on the nursery for the first 8 weeks or so while you get baby into a routine.

helebear Tue 23-Apr-13 15:47:57

I'm lucky to be in the position to be able to do this too. Dd2 is only 8 days old but so far having dd1(aged 2) at the CM 2 days/ week has been a god send as on those days I've been able to focus on the baby & catch up on sleep. From dd1's point of view her routine has remained the same and she adores her CM so I'm keen not to lose her place with her for when I go back to work.

I think we'll review in a few months times and possibly drop down to 1 day/ week. A friend who did this has dropped down to one day/week as she says that now she's over the initial 4 months with dc2 of lots of night wakings and epic feeding sessions she misses her dc1 and 2 days seems too much.

celebmum Tue 23-Apr-13 15:53:41

hi.. im currently doing just this!
SS was going to nursery 1full day a week 8-4:30 whilst i worked pt. DD came along in sept and i kept this going for the following reasons..
to stick to his routine
to give me time with dd
to give me and ds a break from each other
a change of scenery for him and chance to see his friends
to keep his place open as he'll be going back in sept 2.5days

infact in summer im increasing this to 2 days to get him used to sept.. id say go for it if you can afford itgrin

Longdistance Tue 23-Apr-13 16:11:47

When my dd1 was 15 months old we decided to put her into nursery. She was a complete handful to say the least, but very sociable. We put her in for two days, Mon and Fri so I could have a break and get things done. I was pg with dd2 at the time, and was so unwell. We too could afford it, and she loved it using up her energy there, and having a lovely time making little friends (a friend of mines dd went there too).
When dd2 arrived we carried on with this arrangement, and we moved to Oz with here still doing the same days.
We have just this week enrolled dd2 into nursery ad I have unfortunately broken my leg and have had surgery, and dh will be working from home Tue/wed/thurs.
Go for it!

FairyPenguin Tue 23-Apr-13 16:17:33

I would say go for it, for all the reasons you have listed. We did this too, but didn't drop the days until after the first 6 weeks after the birth. Partly so I could have a rest in the newborn days, and also because I got full pay for the first 6 weeks of maternity leave. It made a huge difference to know I could rest when the baby slept, and that she was enjoying herself at nursery at the same time.

shelley72 Tue 23-Apr-13 16:32:19

hi we did this too. DS was 2.9 when DD came along and the nursery had a policy of booking at least two school day sessions a week. it meant that his little world wasnt turned completely upside down by the arrival of his sister - he still got to play with his friends, interact with other adults (they had a music and french group in nursery once a week) and he also kept his place for when i eventually went back to work. it also meant that i didnt have to re-settle him and settle his sister all at the same time (emotionally i found going back to work difficult esp after DD). it helped that he loved his nursery.

it also meant that i got to spend some one-to-one time with DD (as of course i had done with DS as he is was my pfb) and that i could take her swimming/to groups etc without worrying about having a lively toddler in tow.

we are expecting DC3 this summer and have just started DD with two days a week a bit ahead of her rd birthday for mostly the same reasons - she needs to be doing more than sitting round watching me feed the baby and the baby will need some time and attention to itself sometimes. with three i know it will be a juggling act but that way they all get some time on their own with me as well as with each other in different combinations!

Bumbolina Tue 23-Apr-13 16:53:24

We're planning on it - she currently spends the day with my mil, and then 2 days at nursery. When baby arrives the plan is to carry on with her day at Nana's house so she gets a day of one on one attention even if not from me (hmm), and then reduce the hours of the remaining two days to just mornings to make it a bit more affordable and in keeping with her current routine.

noblegiraffe Tue 23-Apr-13 17:15:01

My DS was 3.5 when DD (3 months) was born. I kept him at his pre-school 5 mornings a week and he also spends two afternoons with his childminder. So we get three afternoons together which we spend doing nice activities and he still sees his friends and gets plenty of attention in preschool, and I get a couple of full days with just the baby, which is lovely as she can get my full attention. In the mornings when DS is at preschool, I get to sleep when the baby sleeps and do a bit of housework.

It's been great so far!

zzzzz Tue 23-Apr-13 17:22:36

I wouldn't, but if it suits all of you why not? No one but you knows how much he likes it and how much of a break you need etc.

PenelopeLane Tue 23-Apr-13 21:13:40

Thanks for the advice - I think we will keep him there, at least for the first 3 months.

PickledInAPearTree Tue 23-Apr-13 21:15:40

I have a 9 week and 2 year old.

DO IT!! grin

redandyellowandpinkandgreen Tue 23-Apr-13 21:16:30

I'm planning to. I want to keep his place and I want him to keep going so it's not a massive shock when months later he has to go back. Plus it gives me some time to spend with the baby,

MyNameIsAnAnagram Tue 23-Apr-13 21:18:05

Yup, my 2.6yo is staying at the cms when I'm off. He goes 3.5 days a week and loves it. I figure his life is going to be turned upside down enough without upsetting his routine even more. He's been with her dice 7m so he can't remember not going.

LittlePickleHead Tue 23-Apr-13 21:18:18

Yep, I'm keeping DD in her three days at nursery. She is 4 now though, and would definitely miss her friends and the activities if she didn't go, plus it gives me a bit of time to just do baby stuff. She is starting school in September though so its not for long

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