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Sex drive disappeared

(14 Posts)
Kitkatinatin Mon 22-Apr-13 20:44:02

Hi there, . I was wondering if anyone else has experienced TOTAL slump of sex-drive, and how they've dealt with it? mine has gone totally AWOL.

I'm 22 weeks with first and had expected it would improve by now. I'm very happy with affection - hugs, kisses, but much more feels too much, kind of like i'm being crowded, and I don't enjoy it at all - it makes me feel gross. I've not directly talked to hubby about it as I'm not sure how or if I need to. But it worries me - I don't want him to feel rejected but I don't know how to put it into words and also wonder is this normal, or have I turned into a stone?! Will my sex drive ever come back?

NTMummy059 Mon 22-Apr-13 21:05:59

Erghh this has happened to me too! sad started to get better around 19 weeks (only slightly) but then at 20 weeks in the middle of sex I realised I literally couldn't do it in the position we were in (tmi sorry!) as bump was in the way. This completely stumped me and put me off again! So annoying and DP doesn't understand my issues with it -and I can't explain it to him as I'm not sure myself!

Jenjen85 Mon 22-Apr-13 21:07:26

Don't worry your not alone!!! I'm 29 weeks an mine went AWOL at about 17weeks. DH hasn't mentioned anything but I do feel like Iv kind of abandoned him. Iv had quite a few people saying their sex drive was brilliant during pregnancy so I feel a bit left out as mine is nowhere to be seen!!! We did have sex at about 26weeks but it wasn't very comfortable (or enjoyable). In hoping it returns soon or at least after baby is born

BabyHMummy Mon 22-Apr-13 21:12:34

I was really looking forward to this whole uplift in sex drive everyone kept telling me about but Tbh it hasn't come at all. Luckily dp is being great and we are still intimate in term of forplay (apologies if tmi) but with sickness, pgp & bump i just can't get in the mood for intercourse. Hope it comes back once our dd is here

batfuttocks Mon 22-Apr-13 21:12:55

Me too. Also 22 weeks. Dh being fab about it, I occasionally have gone for it just to be kind (!) but honestly, it does nothing for me at the moment.

I'm on my third and had a really high libido with my first, couldn't care less with my second and unfortunately the same things happened with this one. If it helps, I found that I returned to normal a few weeks after the babies were born (once my bits had stopped hurting!). I think it's a wellness/energy thing for me. I have been really sick until a few weeks ago and now I'm just too tired to be bothered. I also find it hard to feel sexy as I've got spd and move about like an old lady at the best of times!

weeblueberry Mon 22-Apr-13 21:15:39

Sadly I'm the same. Before pregnancy I was pretty much up for it all the time (sorry for the tmi lol). Whether that's my default setting or my biological clock was going mad I have no idea. DPs drive has always been lower than mine though but even he is probably suffering from the total crash in drive I've had...

RJM17 Mon 22-Apr-13 21:36:30

Me too!! I am only ten weeks and was hoping it was an early pregnancy thing!! I just feel like I'm being crowded and poor DH had become so loving over the past few weeks he wants to hug and kiss me all the time and I just want to scream get off!! But I have t as don't want to hurt him or push him away but there is no chance we are having sex!!!
I am hoping it gets better soon cos as much as I don't want it I do miss it!! X

Kitkatinatin Mon 22-Apr-13 21:46:36

Thanks everyone - nice to know I'm not alone and that there's a chance it could come back! I really want to want it! Hoping I'll start enjoying more than a gentle hug and kiss soon enough. It's been worrying me no end...

Lydia161290 Mon 22-Apr-13 22:15:01

holds hand up Me too. sad

26 weeks and I have no sex drive, it's been gone for weeks. I feel really bad on DP, as we had a very healthy sex drive until it got too uncomfortable for me. I was waiting for this spectacular sex drive to pop up and be at like a rabbit. But nothing and it's disappointing!

DP has been great though, not really brought it up and has tried his best with different positions ect, but nothing is working. I end up getting a stitch sometimes and become very aware of my bump.

I do it too to be kind to DP...who says thank you afterwards [grins] hahaha!

MissHinky Mon 22-Apr-13 22:21:03

I'm 22 weeks also and mine pretty much disappeared from the start ... Much to my hubby's disappointment. The fact it's gone doesn't really bother me but has caused issues between me and my hubby sad

knittingirl Tue 23-Apr-13 09:53:43

Me too. I'm 23 weeks, and have had pretty much no sex drive since I got pg. Dh still convinces me sometimes :D

Fairy130389 Tue 23-Apr-13 10:14:00

Me too.
Had horrendous morning sickness until about 14 weeks, had minor few week window in second trimester (ended by 20 weeks) when I had normal sex drive, since then genuinely could not care less. I'm now 32 weeks, horrendously uncomfortable, no position is ok and tbh am so tired would rather scratch my eyes out. Poor DH doesn't know what to do with himself. Usually give in every couple of weeks just to show willing! blush Hope to get it back after bub arrives!

toni1bump Tue 23-Apr-13 11:12:48

Im only 8 weeks and im the same :/.. Usually my sex drive is higher than DH but its completely vanished since the day i dound out i was PG!! Tried it a couple of times but it just goes through me (pardon the pun) and all i can think is "get off!!!" feel so sorry for him. I hope it gets better further along..

BraveLilBear Tue 23-Apr-13 15:32:10

My sex drive hasn't disappeared, but OH's has. I'm less up for it than usual, but way more than him, so I'm the one who has to make all the moves and quite frankly I'm knackered in the evening and he's all up-and-at-em of a morning so we're totally out of sync.

Not the same thing at all, but finding it totally depressing. At least I'm not the only one not getting any wink

My drive did disappear up to about 16 weeks, but at 27 weeks I'm still game. Not sure how much longer this will last so I'm petrified we'll end up going months and months without sex! blush

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