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Comments on bump size

(34 Posts)
rrreow Sat 20-Apr-13 20:36:47

Apart from this being a total pet peeve of mine, I've just realised something! I've started noticing that it's those people who've never been pregnant who tend to comment how big my bump is, how much it's grown, and the occasional "OMG YOU'RE HUGE!" (how anyone can think this is something you want to hear is beyond me..). It's those people who have been pregnant themselves who say I've got a cute bump or say I don't look very big for my dates.

I'd love to have a good comeback for the people in the former category though. I love the Mumsnet classic "did you mean to be so rude" but I kind of feel like I could only get away with saying that to people I don't know, if a friend comments I'd feel awful saying something snarky like that!

babyradio Mon 22-Apr-13 17:41:05

Some women in a shop just told me I am "huge". Thanks, just what every girl wants to hear. They also asked "are you about ready to drop?!" No, just the five weeks remaining, thanks again.

And again "it looks like a girl", IT'S A BOY.

Cheffie100 Mon 22-Apr-13 19:19:10

Hilarious - people really have no idea and are really quite insensitive to how we may be feeling. Your stories have made me feel much better after my 'your bump is abosolutley massive' comment the other day.

BraveLilBear Tue 23-Apr-13 13:39:40

It's not something you should mind, but when you're brought up in a ridiculous body-obsessed culture, people are naturally sensitive to having their body commented about in such an objective way.

rrreow Tue 23-Apr-13 15:00:36

Yes that's exactly it! In theory I'd be fine with it, but in practice I can't help but feel affected when people comment on my size no matter how much I'd prefer not to let it (whether it's about my bump or otherwise). I don't really want people to look at me and the most interesting thing they can think to talk about be my physical appearance, but alas that's the society we live in!

Pusspuss1 Tue 23-Apr-13 15:35:33

I agree - the fact that everyone I meet nowadays feels the need to make some sort of comment on my pregnant size is driving me insane! It's so rude. Do they not realise that I already feel fat/bloated and not exactly at my best, without them pointing it out constantly? Insensitive idiots!

purrpurr Tue 23-Apr-13 15:46:02

I think it's really inappropriate - people saying I'm massive annoy me, as I know I've put on more weight than the NHS recommends, and this is the apparent cause of me now suffering with carpal tunnel syndrome, so now I get to be in pain and feel guilty and feel fat. I've always been thin and thought I was fat. To be fat and have people comment on it makes me feel awful.

I did have someone say to me, a couple of months ago, that my bump was small, which actually just made me worry that my baby wasn't developing.

The comments on my bump size and overall size have now increased to the point where my 'D'M is gleeful about me having to go to Weight Watchers. She's struggled with her weight for decades. She's practically laughing in my face.

I've come to the conclusion that people are absolute dicks just when you need them to be sensitive, to think ahead about what they're saying, and the potential impact of it.

OhGood Wed 24-Apr-13 11:38:23

It's starting to annoy me too actually (love my bump but it's massive) and I am quite relaxed about it normally. Have started to reply with equally personal comments, said in a totally neutral-cheery-perky tone of voice. Last night I said to friend of DH, 'Mine's all baby, yours is all beer!'

Happy to take more suggestions.

OhGood Wed 24-Apr-13 11:40:50

purrpurr Sod them all. You are making a PERSON. Am furious on your behalf. But please please don't beat yourself up. And I got carpal tunnel with DD and I was definitely normal weight then, so maybe it's bad luck.

purrpurr Wed 24-Apr-13 11:49:52

OhGood you have no idea how much better you just made me feel! Thank you. When I was talking to my DH about the Weight Watchers comment last night, he was surprised that not only had it been suggested to me, but it had been put across in a way that said I had put on sooooo much weight I would have to be frogmarched to Weight Watchers. He said, 'But you're all bump, I don't get it, your arms are slim, your legs are slim, you still have ankles, I don't get it.' Buncha flowers for my DH! smile Lovely chap.

Think it's awesome that you can come up with responses btw - I'm always too gobsmacked at the sheer rudeness of people to even remember to close my mouth :D

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