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really pissed off with midwife

(41 Posts)
ditsydoll Thu 18-Apr-13 09:43:32

Just had a mw appointment and when she did thebabys heart rate she asked if we knew what we where having, I said no as we wanted a surprise and she told me it's a girl's heart rate. Does she not get the word surprise!
How reliable is heart rate for sexing? I'm feeling really miffed at her for even hinting at a certain sex.

HolidayArmadillo Thu 18-Apr-13 15:07:06

I think you're being a bit silly, the midwife has just made a guess based on absolutely nothing definitive, I bet other people have speculated on the sex and you haven't been this annoyed. She's got a 50/50 chance of being right, the same as everyone else.

rrreow Thu 18-Apr-13 15:10:14

Old wives tale. There's a 50% chance she got it right.

HullMum Thu 18-Apr-13 15:42:51

She's a midwife. She knows that's just an old wives tale and sharing in the guessing and surprise with you. Feel bad for midwifes they can't win.

ditsydoll Thu 18-Apr-13 16:11:19

If she had said it was just a guess I wouldn't have been upset. I had no idea it was just an old wives tale.
She said "Do you know what your having"?, to which I replied "no we want a surprise" she then Said "it's a girl's heart rate" so I had just assumed there was some way of her actually knowing.
She didn't say it in a kind of oh well you know what they say about higher heart rates light hearted manner she said it quite plainly.

isambardo Thu 18-Apr-13 16:40:05

When my midwife said this I wondered if she had some insight into these old wives tales, but I think they just enjoy guessing as much as the rest of us.
In hospital I was told it was a girl's heartbeat but a few hours later it was definitely a boy that arrived smile

Wishfulmakeupping Thu 18-Apr-13 16:41:36

It's not reliable at all I know at least 2 people who were told the opposite of what they had

MisForMumNotMaid Thu 18-Apr-13 17:03:15

My DD was meant to be a boy by heart rate and time of conception to ovulation wives tales. After two boys statistically she should have been a boy too.

She's the most girly girl I know, I'm not girly.

It's sad that this midwife caused distress by talking about and old wife's tale like it was fact.

SourSweets Thu 18-Apr-13 19:02:31

Total guess, my midwife said she thought I wa having a boy as he was very awkward and kept kicking the Doppler away. Turns out she was right, but she had a 50/50 chance! Sounds like an offhand comment to me, ignore it!

WitchOfEndor Thu 18-Apr-13 19:04:14

We were told that our babies heartbeat was most likely a girl. He wasn't!

PurpleStorm Thu 18-Apr-13 23:52:41

The midwife is talking nonsense. It's not possible to tell an unborn baby's gender from their heartrate.

And I totally agree that the midwife should not have been making guesses about the gender after you'd said that you wanted a surprise, regardless of how reliable or otherwise her method of guessing is.

HolidayArmadillo Fri 19-Apr-13 16:16:38

"And I totally agree that the midwife should not have been making guesses about the gender after you'd said that you wanted a surprise, regardless of how reliable or otherwise her method of guessing is."

I actual think this is one of the most precious things I've ever read on Mumsnet.

MakesCakesWhenStressed Fri 19-Apr-13 16:20:22

it's bollocks old wives tales. like people who guess based on how sick you were or the shape of your bump. ignore

ginmakesitallok Fri 19-Apr-13 16:26:33

At one antenatal check with dd2 a medical student was there. First he spent ages finding her heartbeat, when he did he said he thought something was wrong, it was the cord he'd found. Then he had a good feel, went a bit white and told mW he wanted a word in private. I was terrified, until I heard the mW say, "no, she definitely DOES have a head..."

RosinaCopper Fri 19-Apr-13 16:41:40

Sorry - have only read the OP, but wanted to say that my (very experienced) midwife told me that she thought my twins were b/g and when I said that we'd been told they were identical boys at the scan said 'scans aren't always right, you know!' And guess what - I have identical twin boys.

(so guessing based on a heartrate is sooo accurate, then!)

Rowboat Fri 19-Apr-13 21:35:20

Its a load of rubbish. First time my midwife did the heart beat it was a "boy" one, the second a "girl" one. It depends whether you are hearing directly from baby (galloping horse) or through the cord (train - the whooshing being blood rushing through the cord). I had a girl by the way.

378 Sat 20-Apr-13 13:57:12

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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