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Anyone Else Pregnant Aged 44?

(184 Posts)
LottieH Wed 20-Feb-13 16:02:23

Is anyone else out there in their mid 40s & pregnant like me? Everyone else I know who is expecting seems to be in their 30s (which I was when I started having children) but now feel people think I'm a bit odd?! Have had some very strange comments when I've announced it to people.

cyclecamper Wed 27-Feb-13 10:28:40

Hi Rosie. How did the lunch with your parents go? I think my husband might break off all contact with my parents if they got the baby baptised! Fortunately they are a different flavour of religious (evangelical free), so do adult full submersion baptism. I have probably been a disappointment to them (dropped out of nursing; dropped out of uni; never finished anything, ever; married a divorced buddist/atheist/Quaker) but they have mostly kept it to themselves, possibly because I'm happy anyway. My sister did it properly: Qualified as a teacher, married at 20, got 5 children who she home educates and takes to church twice on Sundays! That is possibly why I get let off doing it right!

Waves to sammi and everyone.

MinkyWinky Wed 27-Feb-13 10:52:25

Hello! Happy to report back that I'm having a honey day grin. Scan this morning showed a wriggling sprout with a heartbeat and everything doing what it should be - 8 weeks 5 days!

Squid - hope your scan goes well today! And yours too tomorrow, ExpatAl

cyclecamper Wed 27-Feb-13 10:55:05

Great news Minky smile

Good luck to Squid and ExpatAl

ExpatAl Wed 27-Feb-13 11:08:33

Brilliant news Minky! So happy for you.
Fingers crossed for you Squid and for me tomorrow. Can't really think of anything else at the moment. Work is suffering badly.

soupmaker Wed 27-Feb-13 11:31:26

Woo hoo Minky. That's made my day. grin

MinkyWinky Wed 27-Feb-13 12:02:59

Thank you! It's made my day too grin

rosiedays Wed 27-Feb-13 14:17:31

Hi all,
Fab news minky grin honey days are great! fingers (and legs) crossed for squid and expat hoping for 2 more honey days
Lunch was...... lets just say we survived. skirted round the elephant in the room and were all very polite! (just 1 comment re age and not having downs tests done)
also seem to be over the worst of the icki sicki bit grinand feel like a human again, hope that gives hope to those still suffering thanks

Squidwoman Wed 27-Feb-13 17:48:09

Happy day for me too! Scan was great and with bloods took my risk from 1 in 63 to 1 in 1127 which puts my risk on a par with (as Prof Nikolaides said) a promiscuous 15 year old grin. The bean is bigger than I thought making me 12+6 instead of 12+0 so due Sept 5th. Better be born in Sept for school year reasons unlike my DD (Aug 27th- she was due Sept 5th too!).
We celebrated with a lovely lunch at Hawksmore in Picadilly (great steak- lots of iron!!).
We're telling the other three DCs this evening before anyone else.

Good luck to all the rest and well done for those with good scan news too!!

rosiedays Wed 27-Feb-13 17:54:48

grin thats great news. bet your others will be sooo excited! enjoy your honey day.

MinkyWinky Wed 27-Feb-13 19:25:11

Great news Squid! Another honey day:-)

soupmaker Wed 27-Feb-13 19:43:24

That's so great Squid. I love a good steak too. smile

ExpatAl Thu 28-Feb-13 08:49:03

Great news Squid! smile. Here's hoping that luck comes in threes!

rosiedays Thu 28-Feb-13 09:23:08

is your scan today expat?

this thread has been SO possitive the last few days i don't want to bring it down but....
can i ask whet you ladies think re down's testing? have you / are you having it? how did getting results make you feel?
i didn't have any extra test done as i would not have terminated pregnancy, I worry of course but don't think a number would change the amount i worry less? am i right that you don't get a yes or no just a % risk?
My bloody mother has set my head off! she sayes i'm wrong and need to know to prepair.
to me downs is only 1 thing that could happen, there are so many things that can't be tested for.... i will love my baby no matter what.

ExpatAl Thu 28-Feb-13 09:38:58

Yes my NT scan is today and will have bloods taken at the same time. If the results that come back are terrible I might think about going further with testing but not to to test for downs. A LONG time ago I used to have visit homes for downs teens and they were nothing but happy positive experiences. I have no doubt a downs child can lead a happy life.

ExpatAl Thu 28-Feb-13 09:41:50

I should add that these are highly individual decisions and the theory is way different than the practice so in reality I don't know what my reaction would be until it happens.

soupmaker Thu 28-Feb-13 09:54:09

I had screening this time round.

When I had DD it wasn't offered with a scan, just a blood test. I decided against as I was advised that my age at the time would result in a high risk result.

I was amazed to get a result of low risk with the screening this time. No percentage was given, just told low risk.

I just take the view that there is no guarantee that all will be well no matter what tests or screening you have.

I agree it is very much a personal decision what you decide to do. You should have a chat with your MW or consultant so you can make informed choices.

LottieH Thu 28-Feb-13 10:14:02

Expatal totally agree with you re Downs children - they are so loving and great to have around. My friend's brother has Down's and is great. He's my age (44) but still loves children's stories & colouring etc and is great with our children. His mum was 32 when she was born. I'm 44 and have been given a low risk result but even if it had been high I wouldn't terminate.

MinkyWinky Thu 28-Feb-13 10:18:48

rosie We've decided that we will have the scan and bloods, but if we're high risk, won't take any further tests. This is a much wanted baby and we have decided if it is high risk, we still won't terminate.

I should point out that when I got pregnant the first two times (first time trying in both cases) that we'd agreed the opposite. Nothing like two miscarriages, trying for over a year and the biological clock ticking to make you rethink things. As expat said, it's a very individual decision.

Good luck today expat

feetheart Thu 28-Feb-13 10:31:24

Just a fleeting visit from someone who is much further down the line - I was 40 and 43 when I had DC who are now 10 and 7.

It is knackering and wears you out completely BUT it does keep you young - lots of people were really shock when they found out that my 'big birthday' last year was 50 not 40 grin

Life does change completely but I wouldn't swap it for the world.
Huge congratulations to all of you, enjoy the pregnancy as much as you can and savour every single mad second of it when they turn up thanks

LottieH Thu 28-Feb-13 10:39:12

Squidwoman - great re your results. Mine came out similar. Have you got brave & started telling people your happy news yet?

MinkyWinky - lovely news for you too. Bet you're delighted! I had a miscarriage just before my 12w scan and then had to have an early scan to check all the placenta etc had come away - all v upsetting. Then at the scan they found another baby in there. We simply couldn't believe it & I sat up & hugged the sonographer. She must have thought I was a right weirdo but I couldn't help myself!

Waves to Sammi and feetheart. X

Rosiedays your family sound hysterical and just like mine. I disgraced myself by getting pregnant before being married. My father just presumed I would automatically get married within a few months. DH's family similarly conservative and the funniest thing is that his uncle has recently come out & they're all talking about him as if he has leprosy. Us younger generation just think good on him. But shock of shocks to DH's mother, his boyfriend is Asian! They are just so unbelievably racist, homophobic and judgmental so can sympathise completely! Luckily you to have found a flat with a veg patch - that would be my dream!

Littlepink keeping everything crossed that it will happen very soon. Took us around 6m (but we weren't very active). X

LottieLloyd congrats from a fellow Lottie!

rosiedays Thu 28-Feb-13 10:50:48

thanks Ladies thanks

hope you have a honey day expat
not getting tests was a personal decision and i stand by it (right for me). unfortunatly my mother has always been able to undermine my self confidence. my mothers ideas her her's and i don't have to agree!!! will stop beating my self up and enjoy not feeling sick grin

ExpatAl Thu 28-Feb-13 10:55:04

Yes stand strong rosie. I must say I debated whether to go ahead with tests or not but it's a good excuse to see the baby!

rosiedays Thu 28-Feb-13 11:10:14

LOL expat enjoy your visit.

My 20 week scan is a week today.... 1/2 way!!(or more confused ) the time is flying by. I'm sure pregnancy messes with perceptions of time.!! hours drag, days fly by. 20 weeks till baby seems no time at all, 4 weeks till house move seems like forever (oh the luxury of a bath!!!)
having a duvet day today smile

cyclecamper Thu 28-Feb-13 16:25:44

I know what you mean about messed up time rosie. I can't work out what day it is, and whole morning vanish but some things seem to take ages!

I didn't have any tests for Downs, partly because I found out too late for some and I wouldn't do anything about it if I knew, except worry a bit more. I have also worked with people with various learning difficulties and my b-i-l's nephew has Downs and knowing those people has always been a positive thing for me. (Also, since my step son has Aspbergers, I am rather more worried about that turning up, anyway!)

Lots of positive test news!

Squidwoman Thu 28-Feb-13 17:45:54

Hope your scan went well Expat

Told my kids last night, then my mum, sister, DP's parents and siblings. Very tiring! Then boss today- went better than I thought. Another hurdle passed...

Kids are in a flurry of coming up with ridiculous names grin

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