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Pregnancy

off work today and feeling guilty

19 replies

bluer · 06/02/2013 09:13

I've not missed a day of work despite having a lot of vomiting etc. i'm a secondary teacher and tbh in our dept we tend to struggle in regardless but today I just couldn't get out of bed! I'm not feeling sick but I just want to lie in bed and doze. I'm twelve Weeks...am I being lazy?

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Bejeena · 06/02/2013 09:25

No you are not lazy!

I am 12 weeks too and could doze for Britain at the moment. Do not feel guilty you need to rest.

itsmyfirsteek · 06/02/2013 09:47

I've had loads of time off with being sick and then an ear infection and now flu like symptoms. I'm fully expecting a rollocking when I get back but our health and the health of our babies is far more important. Rest up and look after yourself.

redwellybluewelly · 06/02/2013 10:58

I haven't missed a single day either (though there were a few where I wasn't really achieving much) however at the grand total of 22+3 I have taken my first 'work from home' and have a nap day.

I think we do place ourselves under too much pressure, I had a full day with small toddler yesterday, walked around the city for 3 hours trying to find some new shoes and maternity jeans, then went out until midnight with a friend to natter about babies and today - well - up at 6am with toddler and by the 8.30am run to nursery knew working from home was the 'only' option!

bluer · 06/02/2013 10:59

Thanks...i've just been sleeping since I posted so I guess I needed it!

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sundaesundae · 06/02/2013 11:03

I feel guilty, I am 33+5 and have a chest infection. I worry about having time off, but it is so hard to fight things off when pregnant. Just look after yourself, all you can do.

goodbyekitty123 · 06/02/2013 11:17

Don't beat up on yourself. I found the first trimester to be unbelievably difficult. Sometimes people don't appreciate how crap it makes you feel. I started feeling a lot more normal by around 15 weeks so take some comfort in the fact that you shouldn't feel this shattered for much longer.

GinAndSlimlinePlease · 06/02/2013 11:50

I have been working from home and snoozing in the afternoon. I'm now back in the office and the exhaustion is awful. And I'm only 6 weeks...it's only going to get worse, isn't it :(

AlisonL1981 · 06/02/2013 12:00

I'm always feeling guilty at work! I work in a coffee shop on a 40 hour contact so its a lot of time on my feet running around. Everyone is really supportive but I still feel guilty when I have to go and sit down! I've done we'll though, 27 weeks and still going!

Missingthemincepies · 06/02/2013 12:31

I feel dreadful about work. With DS I worked til 37 weeks without a single day off. Felt tired and nausea but essentially fine.
This time I had fainting and vomiting so badly I had 1.5 weeks off in the first trimester. Then at 26 weeks I got a lot of braxton hicks/contractions and started with spd. Things now so bad I can barely manage to walk around the supermarket. I'm 30 weeks and won't be going back to work til after mat leave. My logical brain knows I can't work and that I'm actually doing ok to keep going with a toddler, but I still feel dreadful for dropping work in it.
So don't feel bad for taking a day off!!
Pregnancy is hard, some much worse than others. Do what you can and rest when you need to. In the long term who's going to care if you had the odd day week off.
For most people things will really start to improve after 12-14 weeks so hang on in there.

afrikat · 06/02/2013 12:39

I had to take a day off last week as the thought of going in literally made me cry. I was so tired with a bad headache and horrid nausea. Yes, technically I probably could have made it thru work but at some point you just have to give in and stay in bed!

bluer · 06/02/2013 12:42

Thanks! That's how I feel actually...pay of me knows I could work if I went in which is why I think I feel guilty. The other party of me knew that I was teaching all day today with a meeting at break and another at lunch so the likelihood was a full day of running about and not stopping. I needed to stop! !

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SneezySnatcher · 06/02/2013 17:19

It's teacher guilt - a well known phenomenon.

I felt guilty last Friday when I couldn't go in and teach - despite being kept in hospital all day due to high BP. I kept saying to DH "I can go in for the last two hours/hour/thirty minutes." He was

jumpinghoops · 06/02/2013 17:29

I've had a day off today, I have a cold which tbh is not that bad (though throat does hurt quite a bit) but at 31 weeks am knackered and feel more run down because of it.

Last time I was pregnant I was a teacher and that was MUCH worse though, I really feel for you, first trimester sickness and exhaustion is bloody hard to deal with when you're in front of a class all day!

EggyM · 06/02/2013 17:45

Hey also know the feeling- I'm a secondary school teacher too and struggled in throughout all the morning sickness- at one point being sick between every single lesson!

But about 4/5 weeks ago I started getting constant migraines and so have had to take a few days off sick then. And yes definitely feeling guilty- as soon as I manage to get out of bed I start thinking whether should be in work now. Doesn't help that my head of department isn't very sympathetic.

Agree with sneezy - 'teacher guilt'.

bluer · 06/02/2013 20:22

Outing myself totally but there are three other girls in my dept who are pregnant and they are all doing so brilliantly at the keep going thing...maybe i'm just a wimp! And they will have had to cover class which is why I feel guilty. Although I've been really dizzy this afternoon and haven't eaten my dinner...maybe that's why I was tired!

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Onlyconnect · 06/02/2013 20:35

I haven'd had a day off yet, 13 weeks, but if I felt bad enough I would. If I felt on a work day how I felt last Sunday, which sounds very much how you feel, just totally exhausted, I woud have had a day off. Sometimes you just have to.

Zeezee82 · 06/02/2013 23:49

I'm a teacher too. 9 weeks and have barely kept a thing down all week. Not made it in this week and I'm feeling so guilty. I keep having to remind myself that it's not just my health I'm thinking about now. Had 5 days off in 5 weeks which is really not like me but still terrified about a) how I'll cope when I'm back and b) how I'll be treated.

It's been proper sick this week though (not the little bits I was getting last week) so deep down I know I couldn't have done 10 hour days but it doesn't make me feel any better. Knowing I'm not alone in feeling like this does though. Thank you

Mawgatron · 07/02/2013 18:30

Also a secondary teacher, had two days off this week for a cold. Definitely not like me! But was pleasantly surprised that the world didn't end. I'm 21+5.
Teacher guilt is a terrible thing. I am going to attempt to ignore it...

bluer · 07/02/2013 21:03

Was back today and everyone was lovely and also the while place hadn't fallen apart without me so i'm going to listen to my body a bit more from now on and feel less guilt! After all my little bean hasn't chosen to be a teacher so no fair making them suffer for the guilt...

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