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When should baby sleep in nursery?(37 Posts)
My husband has built our baby's cot in the nursery and I am rather nervous about putting her in a room on her own, given the cot death advice. At what age would you allow your baby to sleep i their own room?
Dc1 and dc2 got booted out at 3 months. Depends on the baby and the parents. Do you sleep well with the baby in your room? If yes, great. Keep them there as long as you like. If not, like my situation, then I was comfortable moving them out at 3 months so I could sleep thus be a significantly better parent in the waking parts of the day/night.
We had DS1 co-sleeping until almost one and a half, at which he was transferred to a cot but still sleeps in our room. He started sleeping through the night at about eight months I think, maybe a bit younger? He still occasionally wakes up and has a squeak, then either goes back to sleep by himself or pretty soon after we mumble reassuringly at him. He's moving to his own room when new baby arrives in July. We've agreed to co-sleep for less time with this one but I'm not sure how long that will mean yet.
Moved ds1 into own room at I think just short of 6 months - every time my DH moved he would wake and every time ds moved I would wake.
Ds2 not yet a week old and intend to have him in our room for 6 months (possibly a bit longer as then intend them to share a room).
Step-sis has her 9 month old still in their room (similar to us in that not yet keen to move into room with older child) and it seems to be going well - appears to depend on the baby as to how disturbed they are by your movement.
I moved my LO into his room at 1 week (awaits flaming).
BUT...he would spend the first part of the night in his room - from 7pm till 10pm (woke for a feed), then back into his room. Then we would go to bed. When he woke during the night, normally about about midnight-2am, I'd co-sleep for the rest of the night with him on a mattress that I have on the floor of his room. Still do this now, but he doesn't wake till about 6am now.
We live in a flat, his room takes about 10 steps to get to from the couch, we never shut the door when he was little, and takes about 5 steps from my bed to his cot.
My OH works very long and silly hours, and needs sleep. I was so sleep-deprived that first week because I didn't sleep at all with him in the room. I was so tired at one point that I completely forgot what I'd done with him. I was BF him one minute, and the next thing I knew I was asleep in my bedroom, had NO idea where the baby was.
I think the reduced SIDS risk is as room sharing makes the parent more likely to observe and manage other SIDS risks (e.g. Temp, tummy sleeping, covers over head).
We moved her into her own room at about 3 months when she had grown out of the Moses basket.
This regulating baby breathing idea is a theory, not proven. Evidence for sharing a room reducing risk of SIDS is also limited - I'm not saying I disagree in taking notice of it and following the advice, but if you actually read the research it's only 4 studies which mention room sharing as a factor (and its an association with SIDS too, not a significantly proven causal factor). These studies aren't looking at room sharing alone, they're looking at it in combo with lots of other SIDS-risk factors too, so it really can't be established how much of a difference room sharing or not makes.
All I'm saying is, we can tie ourselves up in knots about this yet the evidence is not strong right now. The critical factors identified for SIDS currently are making sure baby is back to sleep, no smoking in household or around baby, no sleeping on the sofa with baby, no bed sharing when drugged, drunk, overweight, etc. and proper temp control for baby - no excessive heat, hats, blankets over head, etc. these factors have overwhelmingly been proven to cause huge reductions in numbers of babies dying from SIDS. Everything else is just guidance for now - loose evidence at best (again, I am not saying it shouldn't be followed, but its helpful to think about it like that for some perspective).
This thread is interesting reading but has prompted a question for me. My DP uses a cpap machine at night which makes a very low sound, sort of like an air conditioning unit? It's made me wonder whether a) the baby will be able to hear my breathing to regulate the chance of SIDS and b) whether she will get so used to the sound of the machine that she subsequently won't be able to sleep without it?
With dd she ended up in her own room from about a week old with one of those sleep mats for breathing. Me nor Dh could settle when she was in the room.
This time I'm planning to breastfeed so nursing chair etc is set up in our room!
Do what suits you, if need to put baby in the nursery do it with a sleep mat and monitor.
Mothers breathing regulates babies breathing.
OP keep that double bed...... You will need it more than a pretty looking nursery!
Look into converting a cot into a side car arrangement or buy a space saver cot to adapt..... Saved my sanity.
Because the breathing reflex does not work quite as it should in tinys and the parents breathing creates a prompt.
The advice is 6-12 months not 6 months or at least it is according to CONI
I seem to remember its to do with the noise of the parents breathing/ snoring that stops babies from falling into a very deep sleep that is the key thing.
I'm going to sounds os stupid now but can someone answer this for me please. I know that the advice is 6 months to reduce SIDS but how does it reduce it? Thanks
We did 6 months. After 3 months I started to want to read in bed before sleep as opposed to just becoming unconscious the second I was horizontal and dd would wake when I even so much as turned the page so i used to carry the moses basket into her room and settle her to sleep in there and then carry the basket back into our room when I was ready for lights out and sleep. She went into her own room properly in the cot at 6 months give or take a week.
Thanks all for the replies.
Whilst part of me feels that we should decorate the nursery and at least have some furniture in and ready, I know people will want to come and visit (we're a half day drive away from family) so I'd like to keep a double bed in there for as long as possible!
But I'm sure if / when baby decided she needs her own room she won't mind if it isn't 'ready'!
I'll leave it up to her!
LikeCandy, we moved my DS at about 7.5 months - we were just back from a long trip abroad and I was going back to work, so felt like the right time. Transition wasn't a problem at all (except it felt odd having him so far away at night...)
Dd1 - 4 weeks old- not much room with us, and she was more or less sleeping through the night. The house was shaped so we could see straight in her room though, and we had a breathing monitor etc.
Dd2 - 13 months, co sleeping. Would not even entertain sleeping by herself, let alone be put in another room. If she woke in her cot I could feel her looking at me as if to say 'what the hell am I doing in here woman!!'. She also didn't sleep through for a year, which was hell of a shock after DD1.
Sometimes the baby decides. But 6 months is usually fine.
It very much depends who you ask likecandy.
On here loads of people say they move either under 6 months or at 6 months but in RL I don't know anybody who has moved them into there own room under 1 ( or who will admit to it).
But then again most people who are friends of mine with babies I know well enough to talk to about sleeping arrangements I know through cot death support groups so tend to follow all SIDS recommendations through to the max recommended time or beyond.
Like - I moved DD1 out when she was 6 months on the advice of HV. Soon wondered why I was so much tireder than I had been and realised that having to get up and walk to her room etc was awful. When they're in your room you can pick them up and get back into bed to feed without really waking up. DD1 was in with us for a year and DD2 goes down in her room but spends a good chunk of the night in our bed at 18 months.
I'm glad someone posted this (thanks OP!) because ideally I want to keep baby (due April) in with us until at least January 2014 - I know it's crazy to plan this early but I want 'her room' to still be available as a 'spare room' for next Christmas!!
Does this sound feasible? Or after 6 months do most people transfer baby to a nursery?
I don't do babies in own rooms until they are 1 year old.
My 20mo is still in with us! Although that's more the circumstances of our 1-bed flat than choice really. But I do love having her in with us and I'll miss her when we finally move and she gets her own room.
Official advice 6 months but we only made it to 3.5 months. This was due to DD waking at the sound of a gnat's fart and none of us getting a wink of sleep. When I shamefully confessed to the HV her response was "oh don't worry about it, I only lasted one night" :O
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