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Bit shocked, just found out im expecting my first baby.... anyone else new here?

(48 Posts)
kimjayne Sun 30-Dec-12 10:09:45

Hi, this is all very new to me but I have friends with kids and they have all talked about how useful mumsnet was for them! So here goes.
I did a clearblue test this morning and it turns out I am 3-4 weeks. I am happy but seriously scared.

Is there anyone out there at the same stage as me? Who might want to share thoughts/experiences etc.


Rosyisgonnabeamummy Mon 07-Jan-13 18:08:16

I'm an going to be a 1 st time mummy too. Not sure on dates exactly but some time in aug or September.

I have done sore boobs. Constant urine frequency. And achy tummy. Today was my first day of feeling sick and I've gone off milk all together. I'm deciding on food based on the sniff test - does it make me gag? No? Ok to eat.

Poonli Mon 07-Jan-13 17:51:44

Hi I just found out i'm 4-5 weeks pregnant with my first. It was planned but I fell pregnant within the first month of trying so it hasnt really sunk in yet... I'm super excited but have read some stats on miscarriage rates - they are so high and its freaking me out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Any words of encouragement would be greatly appreciated smile

Daisy299 Mon 07-Jan-13 13:22:50

Loubeebaby, did you ask your doctor about the private scan? We are thinking about booking one for the end of the month. Seeing doc tonight, not sure if I should mention it (or need to). No real reason for me to have one except that I fret a lot so might be better for my mental state.

If your moods are getting to you, try just getting out for a bit and wandering around the shops. Really helped me to get some time alone and remind myself that I can still be independent. I bought a scrap book to keep photos and scans in which made me feel a bit more positive and in control.

The tokophobia thing sounds pretty normal! Am just putting it out of my mind for now. Was also thinking about ELCS but the recovery time really puts me off.

loubeebaby Mon 07-Jan-13 12:17:36

Hi Girls,
So so comforting to know we are all mostly in the same place. I think I am completely getting on hubbys nerves with this flipping from happy to sheer terror fact im annoying myself with it!!!
One minute I am calm and serene and I think I have come to terms with it and then the sheer terror sets in again! I cant bloody take it. This is a worse feeling than the nausea!
Like you say its hard to explain to them, and I cant hide my terror from him all the time!
Well unlike you girls (not sure if it was the right thing to do!) we have told family and close friends. It would have been so blatantly obvious over Xmas and NYE as I am normally the ringleader for drinking blush Lol!
Peoples reaction was actually quite nice and we were lucky that we didn't have any negative ones.
I will wait until 12 weeks to tell my manager at work though.
Have got my appointment for private early scan next Tuesday and hopefully will sign up for ELCS with preferred Dr that day.
I have never been diagnosed or really spoken to anyone about it but I am sure I have a mild form of Tokophobia! Plus I just dont trust the NHS after my sister and friends horror stories.
So looks like we will be broke before the baby even arrives! Lolol! What a joy!
Hope your all feeling a little better today girls and not so exhausted and sick. Dunno how I made it to work this morning!
Thanks again for listening to my mad ramblings!! xx

Daisy299 Sun 06-Jan-13 23:33:17

Sorry that message was all over the place, trying to work and am totally exhausted.

Daisy299 Sun 06-Jan-13 23:32:36

Completely agree - funny how things flip back and forth like that. Not sure how much of it is hormones but the panic does seem to feel real at the time doesn't it?

Hubby has just gone to the take-away to get me cheesy chips blush grin

I think you are doing the right thing not saying anything, even if you have to drink Becks Blue from a glass to avoid letting the cat out of the bag.

We wouldn't have said anything if hubby wasn't going away and I'm not really sure I was ready for people to start whooping and shrieking. We're already thinking of paying for an early scan since we had to tell people since so soon.

Don't know if this would help you explain things to your hubby - going to make mine read it:

kimjayne Sun 06-Jan-13 23:05:24

daisy- I think I worried the other half with my stressing and worrying. Its quite hard to explain why you are upset isn't it? You almost feel guilty for not being over the moon. But its not because you don't love the baby, its just such a massive thing to take in. And there's so many things that could go wrong. Its really scary! But we have been talking about possible names today and it was really exciting. I almost forgot all my worries.

kimjayne Sun 06-Jan-13 22:58:13

i got upset because I saw a homeless man on the street today. Living in Manchester im pretty used to this. Think this could be the first sign of my changing hormones. I've also been really argumentative tonight with my husband for no real reason.
We haven't told anyone as yet, apart from one very close female friend who has a 2 yr old. She's already been a huge help. I find myself texting her with random panicky questions all the bloody time. We have a big party planned for next weekend. Its been arranged for months and there's already about 15 people coming. So im starting to worry about how the hell im gonna hide my non alch drinks from everyone. I also have a family meal this week! it would be so much easier if people knew. Almost tempted to tell a few people but my mum's tgeh biggest gossip smile so I really can't. Just have to get though to end of Feb. Thats all I keep telling myself.

Daisy299 Sun 06-Jan-13 19:25:00

Oh forgot to mention - as I said before, spent the first 24 hours crying constantly and I think I managed to really annoy my husband in the process. I wouldn't worry about not being totally delighted, sounds like it's taken us all by surprise.

Daisy299 Sun 06-Jan-13 19:04:47

Hi again KimJayne smile

Like you my appetite has really changed. I'm hungry almost all the time, eating loads yet (TMI) constipated. Feel a bit sensitive to gross things on TV but thankfully not nauseous yet. Mood is all over the place.

We decided to tell family since my husband is going away for a couple of weeks. Glad we told some, but some got WAY too excited for my liking. One even said "don't do anything you shouldn't will you?" - not a comment that I appreciated although I'm sure no harm was meant (she says through gritted teeth).

Sugarlugosi, we will be calling the doctors tomorrow, I don't expect much but keep us up to date with your midwife appointment!

sugarlugosi Sun 06-Jan-13 12:30:49

I've been really bloated for a couple of weeks and very tired. The doctor was really unhelpful so I'm just nervous waiting for the midwife. It all seems so crazy to me wink. I hope everyone is well today xx

kimjayne Sun 06-Jan-13 09:17:32

welcome sugarlugosi and daisy299! its lovely and very reassuring to see how many new first time mum's there are on here. I have a feeling this thread and also the sept13 one will come in really useful over the next 8 or so months.
How are you both feeling this week? Any symptoms?
I have been feeling sick most mornings but feel okay during the day. My appetite has been off though. I can't stomach lunch at all at the minute.
Anyway, welcome again.

sugarlugosi Sat 05-Jan-13 23:55:56

Hiya - it's my first pregnancy too! I found out 27th dec and I'm due 6th September. My sister convinced me to join mumsnet - I've not said much yet but it's reassuring to read. Especially after doing all the wrong things before I found out.

Congratulations grin

Daisy299 Sat 05-Jan-13 23:52:10

Loubeebaby, i'm the same. Just found out after 2 months' trying. We thought it would take 6 or more hmm

Kimjayne, i will probably see you on the September thread!

loubeebaby Fri 04-Jan-13 12:49:08

kimjayne - I will look for the Sept 13 thread. Although my due date seems to be 30th Aug. Im sure they wont mind!
Yes we had only been "trying" (half-heartedly!) for 2 months. So like you so no time to be mentally prepared....if thats even possible! Lol!
I think the first scan is around 12 weeks so another 6 weeks approx until I get that. But like you say I think that will make things seem alot more real and connected for us.
Couldn't even watch OBEM when I wasn't pregnant let alone now!!
I decided even before I was pregnant I would be going for ELCS privately. So will hopefully be seeing the consultant there in the next couple of weeks.
Still doesnt make it any less scary!
I love hearing your rantings! Keep em coming! Lol! xxxx

kimjayne Thu 03-Jan-13 21:24:16

Loubeebaby - im on the sept 13 thread. You should definitely join that too!
Did you say you had only just started 'trying'? It certainly sounds like you are feeling very similar emotions to myself. I dont know if its just coinsidence but I got pregnant a lot sooner than I had ever imagined! And because it happened so fast I almost feel like ive been thrown in at the deep end slightly. As though I hadnt really mentally prepared myself. Im sure that sounds pathetic. And i realise that there are plenty of girls who become pregnant unexpectedly and cope brilliantly.
When are you going for a scan? I think the moment I see the scan the reality will really hit me. Until then it still feels a bit unreal.
I think once ive heard my babies heart beating, I will feel much closer and more connected. Im still not quite convinced its really happening.

Apologies about my ranting. Just feels better to get things off my chest.

Thanks for listening. Xxxxx

kimjayne Thu 03-Jan-13 21:03:14

Its amazing to have so many honest lovely ladies on here! Thank you all so much for responding to my thread. I certainly feel less guilty now that I know im not the only person whos worrying.

I managed to watch one born every min from behind a cushion last night. God only knows how these women give birth with no drugs at all! I was almost in tears last time I stubbed my bloomin toe. Im doomed!

loubeebaby Thu 03-Jan-13 20:24:21

kimjayne - EXACTLY what you are saying is exactly how I feel.....its like your me! Lolol!
My other half is exactly the same and of course all friends and family are over the moon. I feel like I am the killjoy really. Sigh!
I also have at least one friend who has breezed 2 kids under very difficult circumstances and feel like I am worrying over nothing and making a mountain out of a molehill. Which I probably am....but cant control my feelings and emotions.
I am feeling slightly more excited now.....but still keep having panic's now and again.
I am SO SO SO glad I have someone else who understands the way I feel and is experiencing the same thing.
I am technically due on 30th Aug so dunno which group to join! So might have a poke around in both! Lol!
Thanks so much too @ Fooffighter and AR34.
Looking forward to staying in touch with all of you ladies xx

kimjayne Thu 03-Jan-13 15:15:48

loubeebaby - I feel exactly the same as you by the sound of things and can totally relate to all of your worries. I have friends with kids who have made it look so easy and I wish I was them. My husband is over the moon and it's sometimes hard to tell him exactly how I feel as I don't want to bring him down from cloud 9. It has all happened very, very suddenly and I am still finding it all quite overwhelming.

Don't get me wrong. I can't wait to hold my child in my arms! I have always wanted kids and I know I will be a good mum! But I feel like I need to climb a mountain with my eyes shut before I get there.

Thanks for listening. So glad I have somewhere to talk.

FoofFighter Wed 02-Jan-13 19:53:26

don't be worrying about alcohol consumption prior to bfps, for one, nothing you can do to change it - for two, the placenta hasn't been formed/kicked in till around 8 weeks I believe it takes over, so there's no way for it to cross over to the baby, it was living off it's "yolk sac" till then smile

Congratulations all smile

here are links to Due August and Due Sept ante-natal club threads...

AR34 Wed 02-Jan-13 16:33:21

I'm brand new to this site as well and newly pregnant with my first. I'm also terrified and now eating incredibly healthy after eating and drinking all the wrong things over the Christmas period. I think this may be a common thing, thankfully, as I couldn't help feeling guilty. I'm so grateful that I've found this site, so I have people to "chat" to having only childless friends in London.

loubeebaby Wed 02-Jan-13 14:22:37

Hello Ladies,

I am so glad I have finally found some other lovely ladies feeling the same way as me.
I was so relived to read your posts kinjayne and amiready. I feel exactly the same way!!
Only found out I was approx 2-3 weeks pregnant on 23rd Dec. After little "trying"!! So like you say feel a bit of a fraud and like things could go wrong.

Also was worried to death about effects of office party excessive drinking etc. But obviously have stopped all drinking now except for 1 glass of champers on Christmas Day and NYE.
We told the family Christmas Day and ended up telling all our friends.... it was pretty obvious as I am normally the heaviest drinker out of our group! Plus everyone has been hinting for years about a baby (we have been married 5 years)
I am sick with worry about lots of stupid things. It still has not really sunk in that I am actually pregnant. Even joining Mumsnet and posting this is very surreal and took alot!
I am so worried that I cant sleep and feel like im not enjoying being pregnant as I should. Sigh Just totally shitting myself really.
Just worried about stupid things like not being able to cope with a baby....not feeling that instant love for our baby when they are born.....hubby going off my when i look like a heifer (boobs are already huge and awful)....
Have booked the Dr's appointment for Thursday....worried I am going burst out crying like I am the first woman in the world to be pregnant!!! God I sound so pathetic...just wish I could stop worrying and be happy instead.
Thanks for listening to my ramblings.. xxxxx

jemimahpuddleduck Wed 02-Jan-13 13:04:34

Congratulations to all of you!

We got our BFP yesterday so excited! Although it feels a bit too good to be true as it was our first cycle and AF is not even due until the weekend (tested on the first response early tests)

I may be being blind but where do I find the antenatal threads I'm due 15 September smile

cwtchontoast Wed 02-Jan-13 09:51:04

Hey everyone, I'm new here and this seemed like an appropriate thread to introduce myself in smile I've recently found out I'm pregnant with my first (just over 6 weeks) and am terrified but excited too, anyway, its too early to go shouting it to the world, so I thought is join up to have some lovely people to chat all things pregnancy with. thanks for reading smile xx

Somersetlady Wed 02-Jan-13 08:23:12

Hello Kinjayne and all mumsnetters

I found out I was pregnant yesterday and the due date calculator says September 9th. I have woken up this morning almost over the shock but starting to panic like you ladies about the vino (and a couple of vodkas) over Christmas. We decided to stop using contraception December 16th after ten years together and I thought it would take a few months. How wrong can you be as that's the date the calculator thingy has me conceived at.

I will be going on a folic acid and vitamin d shopping trip today also!

We got married 2 years ago and I must have been asked about 100 times since then when we plan on having little ones and every time I abstained from drink people assuming I must already be pregnant (we live in ireland where drinking is compulsory, even if you are driving the host will still try and force you to have just one or two!) so hopefully they are bored of that line of enquiry by now!

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