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Ectopic pregnancy - surgery on Thursday

(13 Posts)
McBobby Sat 22-Dec-12 22:58:47

As some of you know, I am recovering from surgery to remove an ectopic pregnancy and a fallopian tube (it had ruptured).

I am doing well physically and am healing. I do feel emotionally quite fragile. I wanted the pregnancy to work really badly. I know it didn't for a reason but it doesn't make the loss any easier.

I am 39 and now only have one tube. I know it's possible but I do feel like I have less chances and my time is running out.

I don't know what I want to read from you. I just need to share I think. I feel hormonal today and I have thought more about what could've been. Above all I feel so very grateful I have my son. I can't imagine the heartache some women go through of doing this with no children to help the healing process.

It all feels a bit surreal. I went to work on Thursday morning and by 3pm I was in theatre being what feels like rescued from a rupturng fallopian tube! I was also pregnant and planning an August birth and now I'm doing neither.

shock

MrsMuddyPuddles Sat 22-Dec-12 23:06:35

Hugs. I am very sorry to hear of your loss.

orangeone Sat 22-Dec-12 23:53:43

McBobby so sorry for your loss.

I too had an ectopic pregnancy (my 2nd MC after a MMC at 12 weeks). Mine ruptured and I collapsed at 10 weeks pregnant. I was rushed to theatre and lost my right tube. I honestly thought my world was ending and I would never have children. I grieved for my lost baby and felt guilt at the relief I survived. It was a dark time in my life (and my DH).

Fast forward 4 years. I now have a DD conceived via IVF (aged 2.5) and I am 17+2 with a natural conception on one tube. Something at my age (late 30s), I never ever thought would be possible.

I just wanted to post and say there is hope at the end of this horrid mess. It's such a scary shitty thing to happen especially at Xmas, I hope you have lots of support and wine to get through the next few weeks....

Hang in there. One tube doesn't mean you won't be able to conceive again should you want to......
<unmumsnetty hugs>
Orange x

joby21 Sun 23-Dec-12 01:23:39

Sorry to hear about your loss. I had surgery for what they thought was a rupturing ectopic a year ago. Actually, it was ectopic bit i was also miscarrying out of the tube. I too had a tube removed and am now 41 weeks pregnant.

It is still really early days for you. It is an emotional rollercoaster and there is no right or wrong way to get through this. There is quite a long thread in the miscarriage section on here. Am sorry i can't link direct as am on my phone. There are lots of people on there at different stages in their ectopic journey and it may be helpful for you.

Look after yourself physically and emotionally x

McBobby Sun 23-Dec-12 09:30:11

Thank you everyone. I feel much better today. Glad it's Christmas to distract and I can focus on DS. Hopefully next year I will be in a very different place.

I will seek out the other thread.

Have a lovely Christmas all.
Xxx

HaveToWearHeels Sun 23-Dec-12 09:44:32

McBobby so sorry for your loss, but please don't loose heart. This time 4 years ago I was a week on from an ectopic in which I lost a tube. I was 38 and had been trying for a baby for a year. To cut a long story short at the beginning of February 2009 I started feeling sick and had a BFP, a trip to the hospital confirmed I was pregnant. DD was born Sept 2009, 2 months after my first due date. I still call her my little miracle.

moodymonster Sun 23-Dec-12 12:15:54

I lost my right tube in June 2011, due to ruptured ectopic. Those first few weeks and even months after surgery were very emotional and dark, but you do get through them, even when you think you won't. I thought my chances of ever conceiving were very low and I would need IVF. I didn't believe the doctors who told me it would be possible!

But...I'm now 36 weeks with DS1. Had an early scan at 6 weeks, they told be he had been conceived totally naturally from an egg released from the right ovary and 'caught' by the left tube...miracles do happen!

Hope you recover quickly, but the emotional wounds take much longer. Take care of yourself and take each day at a time.

HaveToWearHeels Sun 23-Dec-12 20:33:17

Moody It is amazing to think the tube that is left moves between the two ovaries, I just didn't believe it when thy told me my fertility would only drop by 20% I thought it would be 50%.

McBobby Sun 23-Dec-12 23:10:29

Your stories are helping me tremendously, thank you. Feeling good today and looking forward to Christmas and a new year filled with possibilities!

Consultant said my chances were 65%. I don't understand how the right ovary will function with no tube though! The body is an amazing thing.

Xxx

joby21 Mon 24-Dec-12 00:07:29

It is amazing, i actually conceived this pregnancy from my right side, despite gaving had my right tube removed!

HaveToWearHeels Mon 24-Dec-12 10:46:31

McBobby nice to hear you sounding positive, it will happen for you x
Apparently the ovaries are floating (I though they were joined to the end of the tube, knew I should have paid attention in biology) and the tube thats left moves between the ovaries, it may not always be in the right place but it sometimes will which is the reason your chances aren't halved only reduced.
My tube obviously got right on it, I think being blown up with air made it jump into action. Have a lovely Christmas smile

piprabbit Mon 24-Dec-12 11:02:04

I had an ectopic (tube removed) and was signed off work for six weeks. As you say, the physical recovery was quite quick and simple (it took about two weeks) but emotionally I needed every moment of those six weeks to start coping. Lots of unexpected tears and really feeling down and bereft.
At the same time as the ectopic, I was diagnosed with endometriosis as well and a few weeks later I had tests which revealed my remaining tube was completely blocked so I wouldn't be able to have more children.

Over the next few months we thought long and hard and decided to go for IVF. my DS was born 18 months after the ectopic.

I'm so sorry that you are having to go through all this - there are so many hormones and emotions involved that it is bound to be hard to deal with. Take care of yourself, be kind to yourself and give yourself lots of time.
Good luck.

learnermummy Tue 08-Jan-13 15:26:35

Am a little late to this thread, but wanted to add that I lost a tube to a ruptured ectopic in 2008 and the doctors told me then that the egg from either ovary could find its way to the working tube. I couldn't understand how that could work but have been pregnant three times since then very easily. Good luck.

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