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Lost it and properly sobbed in front of DS

(15 Posts)
Ozziegirly Thu 29-Nov-12 04:09:37

I feel really bad, poor baby.

I'm 37 weeks and am uncomfortable and hugely swollen. I had to manhandle him out of the supermarket earlier when he kept trying to run off (totally out of character) but even though I could feel hot tears of frustration pricking behind my eyes I managed to hold it together.

Got home, and he was making one unreasonable demand after another. Finally had to manhandle him into his pull up for his afternoon nap, when he just reached forward and pulled my hair and then laughed.

I just burst into tears and in an amazing show of maturity hmm refused to read him a story before his sleep.

How am I going to cope when I have two?

SavoyCabbage Thu 29-Nov-12 04:14:34

My three year old hit me when I was pregnant and I burst into tears but she is fine now and is a lovely girl and I am one of the best mothers in the whole world.....wink well no, but the rest is true.

Honestly, it's easier looking after two children than it is looking after one when you are pregnant.

WhatSheSaid Thu 29-Nov-12 04:18:53

If it helps, I found newborn + toddler much easier than being heavily pregnant + toddler. You are just so much LIGHTER physically, it really does make a difference. And you will realise quite how much newborns just sleep and lie around, leaving you to do stuff with the toddler (well, hopefully).

My best pregnant-with-toddler story was at 36 wks we went to soft play so dd1 could wear herself out while I drank coffee/read magazine/ rested my swollen ankles etc. Newly toilet trained dd1 didn't get to the toilet in time, did huge poo in her pants while in a ball pit that could only be reached through a kid-sized tube. She then stood there screaming for me and refusing to move back through the tube, leaving me to, yes, crawl through the tiny tube with my 36-week bump grin. It does make me laugh in retrospect.

You'll be fine with two, it's amazing smile

Ozziegirly Thu 29-Nov-12 04:20:45

I do feel bad, he's only 2 and a bit but he was saying "that's enough now mummy" and when I went in 10 minutes later he said "go away please" which made me feel awful.

I really really hate grabbing at him and manhandling as well, it makes me feel like I am failing, but I can't let him get too far away as I am so slow and he is so fast!

Ozziegirly Thu 29-Nov-12 04:22:31

grin at crawling into soft play - I saw a mum having to do that the other day actually and prayed that I wouldn't have to!

Marmiteisyummy Thu 29-Nov-12 07:03:51

I wouldn't worry. It may not be a bad thing that he now knows that pulling your hair makes you cry!
My DS is 2.5 but I'm only 21 weeks so not as bad yet but it's not been fun so far. At 2 DS would pull and run off a lot. Finally caved and bought reins which were fantastic. Only needed to use them for a few weeks and then the threat of them ("hold mummy's hand or you're reins are going on") was enough to keep him with me. He's now very good and will even tell me "it's a car park mummy, hold my hand"!!!! So a couple more months and things will be much better, and you won't be pregnant anymore, so feel better too.
Having a good sob in front of kids very occasionally will do no harm at all. They need to know we're human too.
Good luck, hope baby comes soon.

HowToChangeThis Thu 29-Nov-12 09:37:47

As Marmite says, gets some reins and use them. Dd is 19mo and I'm 38 weeks and find the, brilliant. Su's always had them so wants to put them on because she knows she is then allowed to walk rather than being in a buggy.

If you DS isn't used to them then try them now and you may well find the threat is enough to get him to behave.

Iggly Thu 29-Nov-12 09:40:04

get your dh to do the shopping. or shop online.

avoid anything which might require manhandling!!!

femmeaufoyer Thu 29-Nov-12 09:44:17

Aah, don't feel bad, you're only human. Same for me yesterday. I'm 38 weeks and huge. DD found me crying on the bathroom floor agony with thrush and piles combined. She started crying too which made me feel awful! All I do is moan and shout at her and DH at the mo. I'm so glad to hear that people have found it easier with a toddler and newborn rather than toddler and pregnant. I thought this would be the case. I feel so physically debilitated at the moment. I'm so ready not to be pregnant!

ilovegarlicbread Thu 29-Nov-12 09:50:44

Similar thing happened to me i picked DD up from school who was in a foul mood normally i can distract and talk her round but she was crying and shouting at me in the middle of the street i felt my eyes going. Managed to get home and i just started sobbing then DD started sobbing how sorry she was! I felt awful but put it down to hormones (I hope). Don't be too hard on yourself good to hear others feel like this.

Mummyof3tobe Thu 29-Nov-12 11:57:45

Don't feel bad. Mummies are humans too and it isn't all bad for them to know you have a breaking point! Just tell him slimy that he hurt you, you cried and have a big cuddle to make up.

Mummyof3tobe Thu 29-Nov-12 12:51:55

slimy = simply

racingheart Thu 29-Nov-12 12:56:53

You didn't do wrong. It's very important that they learn you are human, have limits, have emotions, and most important of all, that the way they treat others can affect how others feel. Good for you for letting him know he'd upset you.

You wouldn't want him to see it too often, or he'd be distressed by the emotional power he had over you, but once in a while, at the end of your tether - no harm done at all.

TinkyPeet Thu 29-Nov-12 16:05:18

Don't feel bad about the manhandling, my daughter is 2 and she's an absolute nightmare, seriously if 'terrible twos' came with a picture it would be of her screeching with a subtitle of 'devil child' she quite often causes a scene anywhere we go and flat refuses to get I. The car so I have to hold her in with my knee whilst tryin to wrestle her seatbelt on, while she's screaming blue murder and braying me over the head with whatever she can get her hands on. Obviously at this point people think I'm beating her or abducting her and stop for a good stare untill I appear from the back seat looking like I've been dragged through a bush, slam the door and kindly tell them to piss off mid their own business.
I'm 6+6 today so god help her me when I'm humongous and have had enough!
So yeah, don't feel too bad xxx

TinkyPeet Thu 29-Nov-12 16:06:44

You should see me trying to get her dressed or get her to eat or change her nappy :/ it's quite comical really, just not at the time haha xx

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