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Pregnancy misery (feel so selfish) but it is how I feel...

(7 Posts)
Lotsoftears Mon 12-Nov-12 20:55:45

Name changed.

Can I vent? I am v sorry if this is read by ladies who are facing challenging situs re their pregnancy but I need to get this out. I am sitting here crying, DH is out.

Am only 9 weeks into 2nd preg but feeling so ill and so sorry for myself. Didn't have any sickness whatsoever with DS, so feeling this ill is a bit of a shock.

I am trying to look at the positives of being pregnant and also not actually being sick but feeling ropey all day is really taking its toll.

I run my own business (which is basically just me) and I feel like I am letting everybody down as I am struggling to find the energy/inclination to do anything outside of the essential bits.

In addition I keep getting an itchy bottom at night, and I am torturing myself with someting I read online about female thread worms coming "out at night" to lay eggs and it is an image I cannot get out of my head - this giant worm thing (think something from Alien) coming out of my bottom and laying horrible eggs. I know I need to do to the Doc's, not that I can take anything for it, but can get stuff for DS and DH to protect them.

And I just feel so rubbish as DH is having to do a bigger % of stuff that normal. He is a great Dad, but I know he is finding having v little respite at the weekend (we normally ensure each other has some free time at the weekend, something which might not be able to continue post DC2 obv). I am torturing myself with posts on the relationship boards, so many of the women on there seemed to have been pregnant with DC2 when their DPs left them. Rationally I have no worries about DH, but just thinking ahead to 7 more months of feeling like this and how rubbish it will be for him too. Not that excuses men for having affairs etc.

Please don't flame me, I feel really fed up.

I know I just have to pull myself together but I just want to feel better.

Thanks for reading if you got this far.

Ellie092 Mon 12-Nov-12 21:00:43

Please enjoy your pregnancy my baby girl is 12 weeks old now and everyday I regret not enjoying my pregnancy because now I hate no being pregnant I hate that I have to share my daughter and I hate that it's not just me and my baby anymore, I hug her but I don't feel close to her because I miss her being in my tummy then she was the closest to me and that's the only time I will have that closeness with my baby alone don't get me wrong i love my daughter to bits and have an amazing bond with her but please enjoy it because if you don't you may just regret it! It will get easier!!

Good luck and congrats smile xx

fanjobiscuits Mon 12-Nov-12 21:08:10

I think it is really hard to think positively when you aren't feeling well and hormones are playing their roller coaster games. Give yourself a break in whatever way you can. Remind yourself of what you are doing well, have something nice to look forward to each day, build in breaks and mini treats, remember the good things you've got. You will get through this and it will all be fine.

BlingLoving Mon 12-Nov-12 21:14:37

Being pregnant is crap for lots of us. Some people love it. But lots of people don't because it is bloody hard work and it makes you feel awful.

Hopefully you will start feeling better at end of this trimester. And yes, dh will struggle as he will have to do more. As will you. It's the main reason dh and I are not rushing for a second. That's hard, but as long as you remind yourselves and each other of why , you will get through it.

As for your bum- do you have piles? Makes your bum itchy. Quick application or two of anusol could help!

Good luck. Try to rest. Eat well and cut yourself some slack. It WILL get better.

Lotsoftears Mon 12-Nov-12 21:23:09

Thanks all for replying. It is good to be reminded that it will get better, and I am trying to focus on being thankful I have people in my life (as I am sure we all do) that are having real pregnancy problems/challenges.

We were having a look at all the pfb baby videos we took of DS last night and it reminded me how lovely it is to have a baby in the house, just need to focus on the end game!

Will look at piles - thanks.

Thanks again, it is so nice to have some soothing and supportive words and a place to share my silly thoughts.

ReindeerBollocks Mon 12-Nov-12 21:28:25

First trimester is always the worst. The sickness, exhaustion and secrecy, so maintaining a normal image can be a right effort. Once the sickness passes you might feel a bit more positive about the pregnancy.

Also you might have worms or piles. But I doubt you have tape worm (the really long alien like worms). Generally tape worms come from dodgy beef or poor sanitary conditions, and it's actually rare in the UK, you might have threadworms, which are very common but also extremely small and easily treatable if you go to the GP (normally you can buy overe the counter stuff, but not when pregnant).

Get to the GP and also try and see if your DH can let you rest more when he is around. Hopefully the sickness will pass and you can then enjoy your pregnancy and growing baby smile

cherrypiew3 Mon 12-Nov-12 22:14:14

Hi I know how you are feeling I was sick everyday all day for the first 25 weeks to the point where getting up became a mission in its self. I depended on dh a lot we have 3 more dc and I felt really guilty not doing much. I wished the days away once the sickness stopped all the other pregnancy crap started.

I am 36 weeks now so nearly at the end but I have moaned my whole way through it, all of sudden it has hit me that I will never do this again and I feel a little sad that I have not enjoyed it more.

Hang in there it will get better and hopefully then you can start to enjoy your pregnancy.

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