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awful meltdown and how do you cope with 2

(8 Posts)
Neverme Thu 08-Nov-12 11:47:50

am 20 weeks with dc2, and just had the most awful meltdown with DS who is 2.7 years old. Feeling like the most awful parent in the world. fortunately it happened at home and DH was there to take him out to give me some space. He was just really being a monkeyish 2 yr old which usually i ignore and can cope with, but it escalated into me yelling at him and giving him a smack on the bum (lightly), but then a harder one. Just feel like I can't cope at all but I can't go ask for help with the gp or midwife because then they would inform social services or something. Oh god, just can't do it, don't know why i'm even writing this, nothing I have done is excusable in any way.

looloo13 Thu 08-Nov-12 11:57:46

Hi hun, Im expecting baby number 4 and a couple of days ago I had meltdown with mine ( they're 17,16 and 11). its expected to feel like its too much some days, just walk out of the room, shut the door and breath. do this before it leads to a smack it will make you feel much better. I sit in my room and cry alot of the time then feel guilty cos I should be greatful for what I have. Dont beat yourself up it happens to all of us xx

Katydive Thu 08-Nov-12 12:09:36

Same here, pregnant with my third (did I really say that... dawns on me!) and I have a very spirited nearly 5 year old and a angelic 2 1/2 yr old. I said some horrible things to my eldest the other day and regret it terribly ( told him I would sent him away) I feel awful just thinking about it. We feel such a deep love for our children, but they are sent to drive you nuts, I have a book called 'Toddler Taming' it's really very good... (goes to get it out!)

Neverme Thu 08-Nov-12 12:17:25

thanks. I think my hormones are all over the place. Just feel like a crap mother right now. Most of the time everything is very calm and ambient in our house, but when it goes wrong it goes really wrong.

amazingmumof6 Thu 08-Nov-12 12:43:48

let's have a worst mum competition! smile
yesterday I screamed at my 9 year old that I hated him and that I hope he'll have a shit day,coz now I will thanks to him! I never ever done that before! what a horrible thing to say, just so ugly and quite childish actually! just awful. I regretted even as the words were pouring out of my mouth. then I cried for the rest of the day, wishing I had never said that or even had thought that. coz of course I don't hate him! I love him so much, he's my blondie, my sweet cuddle monkey - but boy does he behave like a vile nutcase sometimes! they can be so annoying, arguing back, stomping, fussing and fighting, pushing me to breaking point, dancing on my nerves never mind the throbbing headache I have already and I keep looking at the clock, it's ticking, hurry, hurry, can not be late for school!! explosion....
we have 6 kids oldest 11 youngest 6 months. stress should be my middle name. I love them all so much, I hate shouting and screaming at them! I'd love to be just calm and fun and sweet mommy all the time, don't know where the monster mum comes from! and then we say our sorries and kiss & make up and they look me in the eye and say they still love me, even if I get cross with them...

NAR4 Thu 08-Nov-12 14:30:12

We all loose our temper sometimes. We wouldn't be human otherwise. Pregnancy hormones make most people cranky at some point. Lack of sleep when we have little ones doesn't help either.

Chunkychicken Thu 08-Nov-12 17:24:41

I'm 38+3 with #2 and have a nearly 2.7yo. She is a little angel 98% of the time - sleeps well, eats well, happy to sit & entertain herself, but as the pg has progressed, as we both get towards nap time, she can become a handful & I become less & less tolerant. I haven't had to smack her, but have lost my temper at times and shouted at her to be quiet/get in her damn car seat etc etc. Totally over-reacting, but at the time, I physically hurt with the exertion of it all & just can't take it. It's fine if we're indoors & I can just put her to bed for her nap before we get to that place, but if we're out, its hard to do that. Plus, now I feel guilty because our outings this wk have been the food shop & the chiropractor for me, & 1 toddler group. I feel like I'm hibernating & cbeebies is getting a bit of a hit...

I'm trying to say that its normal to over-react at times, we're all human and actually the ~9mths of pg is a short time, your DS won't remember the details of this time and it'll be 'business as usual' soon enough, even if that includes another little bundle of joy too!! All the best.

Neverme Thu 08-Nov-12 19:31:58

Thanks all. At least I'm not the only one.

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