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BMI of 35... Scared to go to my appointment!

(21 Posts)
hopeful92 Sat 27-Oct-12 17:17:51

So, the title of the thread says it all really guys.. I'm just under 5 ft 8 and I weigh about 16 stone 2lbs. Tomorrow I have my appointment to calculate my BMI and give my bloods and pee sample. I am really scared about my appointment because I am embarrassed of my weight. My boyfriend doesn't know how much I weigh and his parents are "fattist". If they found out I had to have consultant led care or anything because of it I would never hear the end of it. To top it off his mum is a nurse and so is even worse!

What I wanna know is does anyone else have a high BMI and if so, what sort of differences are they? If you have to go to a bigger hospital to give birth, do you still have your appointments with the midwife you saw for your booking appointments etc or do you have to go to the bigger hospital? Are the local appointments only for midwife led care?

It annoys me because I am physically fit, walk my dog twice every day and am a size 16 in clothes (so not that huge!!) but I just feel like all the healthcare people will judge me and be rude. I am also scared about the scan not being clear - will it be clear enough (im size 16). Sorry for the long rant guys, I'm just on the brink of tears here worrying about everything sad

cupcake78 Sat 27-Oct-12 17:22:09

You won't be judged by your midwife! The rest of your family has no need to know any of it! Don't tell them, they don't need to know wink.

I also have a high bmi but its only my business, nobody else's. I am also fit and active, walk run swim etc. If only we were all as perfect as your boyfriends patents wink

Ellypoo Sat 27-Oct-12 17:22:17

I now have a BMI of 33, and have to have a GTT at 28 weeks, but am consultant led anyway, so not sure if this would have swung it.

At my MW appt for booking in, she weighed me but didn't mention the weight or BMI - just wrote it on the notes. You don't have to let your MIL or DH read your notes if you don't want them to, but they wrote my weight in kg which I don't understand anyway!!

I am not as fit as I used to be, but try to swim regularly etc and only wear size 16 too, so I totally am with you on the 'not being huge' no matter what BMI says!!

cupcake78 Sat 27-Oct-12 17:22:41

Parentshmm

Trishstar Sat 27-Oct-12 17:42:59

As everyone else has said they don't need to know! It's your business!

My BMI is 29, I'm 5ft5, and weighed 12st7lb before the pregnancy. I wore 14-16 in clothes and am active too!

It was never even mentioned! Just written in my notes!

I'd say its more of a worry if someone smokes or excessively drinks thru the pregnancy, that would be more of an issue!

hopeful92 Sat 27-Oct-12 17:56:04

What about the consultant led care bit does that mean you dont have "normal" ante natal appointments with a mifwife?

beckslovestimmy Sat 27-Oct-12 17:56:34

I was a size 14-16 in clothes, Bmi of 29, all my scans gave been really clear so don't worry, and don't tell your DH or MIL your weight. At least with consultant led care you will get more appointments, prob an extra scan, and the test for gestational diabetes. You will still have all your normal midwife appointments. Look at it as a positive that you will be even more closely looked after. Good look with your pregnancy xxx

soundevenfruity Sat 27-Oct-12 18:17:17

My midwife was very apologetic when she had to say something about my BMI so I wouldn't worry about that. I went on to develop pre-eclampsia which is one of the risks as far as I remember. So I really regret loosing track of my weight like that. sad They might pay much closer attention to your blood pressure from now on.

MrsEddChina Sat 27-Oct-12 18:26:39

My BMI was around 40 at my booking app. I have seen a healthy lifestyle midwife at my hospital, who was lovely and not judgey at all. I am consultant led, and had my first app with him at 19 + 5 weeks pregnant. He was also nice and never really mentioned my weight. I saw another midwife before the consultant who weighed me but again she was lovely. I have lost a stone since my bookng in app and have put on 2 pounds in the last 2 months at now 20+2.

I will need an extra growth scan at 34 weeks but at the minute will only see the healthy midwife at least once more.

Everyone has been lovely and really supportive. The only thing that upset me a bit was on my 12 week scan notes it said "technically difficult scan due to body habitus"

I will have to have a gtt test but that doesn't really bother me. Everything so far has gone well in my pregnancy and I am looking at the extra apps as more chances of hearing baby's heartbeat and an extra scan is always a bonus!

Don't be scared! My BMI was 36. The only difference for me was that I was automatically booked a gtt. I did have borderline gd so I saw a consultant after my test results. As I managed to keep my blood sugar in check through diet I didn't see a consultant again until I was 37 weeks. Without the gd my care would have been midwife led.

I was offered advice but never lectured at all. The only other time it was mentioned was at the 20 week scan when they asked if I understood why my pictures weren't crystal clear. They had no problem taking the measurements at the scan and the pictured were good but not brilliant. I was size 18 at 5'5".

Relax, it will be ok smile

iliketea Sat 27-Oct-12 18:32:10

I had 'consultant led care' as my bmi was 36. All routine appointments were with my midwife. She said that she would have supported me if I wanted a home birth as I was fit and healthy otherwise. I had more frequent scans plus an appointment in hospital clinic with each scan. It also means that if you are having a hospital birth, it would be in a consultant led deliverh unit (as opposed.to a midwifery led unit). I guess one difference is that they tried to force me to see a dietician, which I refused because my weight had been stable for about 10 yeara and.no.dietician had ever managed to do.anything about that. Also had a glucose tolerance test as standard.

BionicEmu Sat 27-Oct-12 18:33:03

I have a bmi of 35 too. The only thing about it that was mentioned was that I'd have to have a glucose tolerance test at about 28 weeks to check for gestational diabetes. Was also referred to the research midwives as my hospital are part of a clinical trial involving raised bmi in pregnancy, which I am now enrolled on, but I by no means had to. I'm now 26 weeks and have so far had no problems at all with scans.

I'm consultant-led anyway due to pre-existing spinal problems, and my last pregnancy I had pre-eclampsia and spontaneously delivered at 34 weeks.

However, a friend of mine with a similar bmi was originally consultant-led. She went to her first appt with the obstetrician, who basically said "there's no problem here" and referred her back to midwife-led care.

cupcake78 Sat 27-Oct-12 18:41:15

Bionic, you've reminded me of my second from last pregnancy I was told by my consultant their was no need for him to keep seeing me as I was healthy although overweight. Pregnancy didn't end as hoped but that had nothing to do with the consultant or my BMI.

I'm expecting to be consultant led this time due to my BMI and it actually makes very little difference except I get more appointments which for me is a benefitgrin

Notmyidea Sat 27-Oct-12 23:13:44

I've declined the consultant-referal based on the fact that I was the same weight when I last had a baby before all the bmi fuss was introduced and had a healthy and straightforward pregnancy and birth. If routine antenatal care detects an actual problem I'll reconsider!
You don't have to share details of your antenatal care with your mil if you don't want to.

Worley Sat 27-Oct-12 23:28:06

speaking from a sonographers point of view a BMI of 35 is Normal BMI of patients in my area. yes it's technically harder to visualise and measurements are approx but some patients have BMI of 60...that is hard scanning! (and a killer on our arms) we have to report why it was a difficult scan to justify ourselves. this may sound strange but some people have different types of "fat" the soft squishy type is better than people who are rock solid.. and little but extra covering is easier than those with a low BMI.
there are many reasons to be consultant led care; both low and high BMI are reasons where I am as well as lots of other reasons. it is nobody else's business but yours. you dont have to tell people your consultant led care so you?

LadyofWinterfell Sat 27-Oct-12 23:39:10

BMI of 35 here too.

I had to have regular growth scans in my last pregnancy, and a GTT. Was technically under consultant care too. Other than that nothing differed from my previous two pregnancies!

The growth scans were because i didn't gain any weight till the last 10 weeks, and then it was only 12lb. They were worried DS would be small. He was 9lb 1oz!

Secondsop Sun 28-Oct-12 01:12:43

I have a much higher BMI than you. The medical staff have never been judgey about it - the closest anyone got was when a doctor said I could have a referral to a dietician if I wanted but that she was sure I knew what healthy eating was and that it was only an offer. Everyone else has treated me as the patient in front of them, not as someone who should be lectured. So try not to worry! As for what consultant led care means, I still have antenatal appointments at the antenatal clinic but they are with a doctor although each appointment starts with a midwife checking my blood pressure and urine. As it happens I've had a lot of complications so have also seen the midwife at my surgery in addition to the antenatal ones, mainly for her to check my blood pressure. When it comes to the birth, my BMI is too high for me to be in the midwife led unit so I'll be in the hospital itself, but that's fine by me - I want the whole panoply of the medical profession present if I can! I also have to see an anaesthetist in advance, just so that they can pre-assess me rather than having to do it in an emergency situation. I was also offered a glucose tolerance test (which was good as it turned out I do have gestational diabetes).

There was no problem with getting a clear scan. My scan report does say something about "maternal habitus" but that was all.

As for your family, well it's absolutely none of their business how you are being treated. None of them have any right to know any of it, and if you don't want your partner at your booking appointment when you're weighed then you don't have to have him there for it or for any of it.

As an aside, I've only been weighed twice this pregnancy - at booking, and at the diabetic clinic. And that's with me having a way higher BMI than you.

Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy x

Adviceinscotland Sun 28-Oct-12 07:37:41

My bmi was 34.6 at booking so maybe I just missed the "magic" 35 cutoff. Am 18 weeks now and half a stone less than booking (only plus side to morning sickness) ideally now I feel half human again I am going to try and watch my diet and hopefully only put on a stone in the next 22 weeks which should make me lighter after the birth than before.

hopeful92 Sun 28-Oct-12 11:43:42

Well guys, today is D-Day, lets see how traumatic it is eh!! 8.45 tonight is my appointment (quarter to 9 on a Sunday is a VERY strange appointment but she forgot about me and it's her only free slot before her night shift!). So, I will let you all know how I get on. I HATE needles so giving blood is going to be more traumatic than the weighing, and I have asked my boyfriend not to come in (told him it was because of the needle bit, not the weighing bit). I know I should trust him as I have been with him for 4 years, however it is my personal issue because I am embarrassed by it. Hey ho, let's see what happens. Whatever will be will be.

Notmyidea Sun 28-Oct-12 12:20:16

good luck!

hopeful92 Sun 28-Oct-12 21:35:42

Midwife was lovely, bmi was 35.6 ad suspected, she said they will consider me there if my weight remains steady however I think I would rather go to the bigger hospital where they have doctors working through the night (no.emergency care at the smaller hospital). No mention of consultant yet she said I can have all my appointments with the midwives still i just have to give birth elsewhere! Don't know what I was worried about. Thanks so mucb for your support ladies x

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