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Must calm down....

(7 Posts)
Stepawayfromthesweeties Mon 15-Oct-12 13:48:37

I've got my first midwife appointment this afternoon and I am driving myself round the bend. I'm 5+3 and actually feeling quite well (after a nauseas/sicky couple of weeks) so have convinced myself that there's actually something wrong. I have just spent the last hour googling ectopic pregnancies, even though I only have a mild twinge in my right hand side.

I am a natural born worrier, but this is getting stupid now. I think I should ban myself from google as every time my body is feeling something new and different I am researching it to the nth degree.

Is anyone else this paranoid or is it just me?

JennerOSity Mon 15-Oct-12 13:52:36

Step awayyy from the google!

I am sure you are not the first - but try to make a conscious effort to avoid letting yourself dwell on these things or you will go mad before the 40 weeks are up!

Plenty of ladies enjoy few adverse effects of being pregnant - it's a blessing many would give large sums of money for - not a sign of problems. Count yourself lucky and keep reminding yourself of this every time you get tempted to use it as a reason to worry instead.

If your body carries the load of pregnancy lightly - don't dump all the 'hardship' you are expecting to feel on your state of mind instead - or it would be a great waste of some good fortune. grin

Stepawayfromthesweeties Mon 15-Oct-12 13:59:12

Thank you, you're absolutely right. We haven't told anyone else about the pg yet, normally I'd ring my mum and she'd tell me I'm being ridiculous but we're going to try and keep it quiet until 12 weeks. I just needed someone else to tell me to remove myself from google ;0) x

JennerOSity Mon 15-Oct-12 14:06:44

If you find you are tying yourself in knots - maybe go ahead and tell your Mum if she'd get you back on track? Not everyone waits for the 12 week / first scan.

I did with my first, partly cos it was first and it didn't feel real until we had that first scan, partly cos it seemed like the 'right' thing to do and partly because DH's parents live miles away and we couldn't see them sooner for face to face announcement and didn't want the cat out of the bag.

however with 2nd pregnancy (due tomorrow!) we told everyone straight away as we reasoned if it didn't go well, it would be better people knew, otherwise they would just be puzzled why we were so upset and it would be worse telling them then; and if it all went well why bother waiting?

So arguments both ways - if you could use your mum's support - would it be so bad to tell her 'early'?

weeblueberry Mon 15-Oct-12 14:11:16

Yep. I'm with you.

I'm on my first pregnancy but right before I found out I was pregnant, our close friends lost a baby at 14 weeks. They were understandably heartbroken and now I'm finding it difficult to just assume everything will go okay.

We're now at 10+4 and have had a private scan at 9 weeks where everything was found to be totally normal and a strong heartbeat was found. Basically, logically, I have absolutely no reason to think there might be anything wrong. But it doesn't stop me worrying. sad

I'll be a lot happier when we get our 12 week scan (which has frustratingly been organised for when I'm actually 13 weeks...) but I can't get it out of my head that something is going to happen. My mum and partner think I'm being ridiculous but it's hard to ignore it....

Stepawayfromthesweeties Mon 15-Oct-12 17:08:11

well unfortunately the midwife hasn't really helped. I was in there 10 minutes, she gave me loads of paperwork and sent me on my way. She asked me if I had any questions and looked totally deflated when I said yes!! I only asked one, but you could tell she wasn't really bothered and wanted me out of the room. I've got the full appointment in 2 weeks when I shall give her millions of questions :0). The poor woman won't know what's hit her. I'm sure she's just over worked and underpaid, but it felt like a bit of a non event. At least I've got she loads of stuff to read through now though, that should keep me off google for a while :0)

Dogsmom Mon 15-Oct-12 17:16:55

I drove myself mad too on Google, for some reason I'd focus on early miscarriage but conveniently skim over the positive stories, I was making myself miserable so stopped it.

I did still worry about there being no baby there at the 12 week scan even though I'd had no bleeding and 3 missed periods, I then worried there would be no baby at the 16 week gender scan and now I have niggles that there will be no baby next Monday at my 20 week scan despite the fact I can feel her moving every day!

Sorry to hear your midwife wasn't very enthusiastic, you'll probably find her much better at the next one, ours wont even let you book in until after 8 weeks or 2 missed periods, it's a much longer appointment (mine was 45 minutes) and they weigh you, do blood pressure, lots of form filling and explain about the various screenings you can have.

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