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Do you think some babies would NEVER come out themselves?

(29 Posts)
Spice17 Fri 12-Oct-12 10:12:50

Hi all

I'm 40+6 today and am losing the plot. Sweep yesterday but nothing happening, 2 nights ago had what I think was contractions every 25-30 mins between 2.00-4.00am, then just stopped. Lots of shooting twinges/dull period type pain but nowt else.

Whilst laying awake at 5 this morning I was wondering if some babies would never come without assistance and is there any evidence for this? I honestly can't see this one making a move herself! I was also wondering what happened before the days of induction, scary thought eh?

I've never had a feeling like this in my life, just so frustrated!

ThunderboltKid Fri 12-Oct-12 10:23:45

I feel like this too. Only 40+2, but a sweep yesterday showed my cervix was firmly closed and high. Baby back to back and not engaged at all (despite being my first).

My bishop score is currently -3!

milkand2sugars Fri 12-Oct-12 10:27:03

My sister had 4 sweeps then finally got induced at 42 weeks with both her dc's. the midwife told her some women never naturally go into labour.

Spice17 Fri 12-Oct-12 10:32:04

Thunder - I didn't even know what the Bishop score was until I just googled it - did MW tell you? I've had a pretty crappy experience with mine tbh, so not suprised it hasn't been mentioned to me!

I just cannot see me simultaneously going into labour at any point, am gutted sad

I know it's very hard but try to plan things in, I haven't really this week and I'm just hanging around the house like I'm on death row! smile

Spice17 Fri 12-Oct-12 10:34:23

Ahhhh Milk no! <puts fingers in ears and shouts la la la, I can't hear you>

Kind of what I thought though, god knows what happened in the past to these poor women confused

SheelaNeGig Fri 12-Oct-12 10:38:23

Normal pregnancy is up to 42 weeks. So don't stress at 40+6. Loads of time left.

ThunderboltKid Fri 12-Oct-12 10:41:12

NCT taught us about bishop scores, so I calculated mine (using an iPhone app wink) based on info given by my MW.

I'm making sure I'm fully informed about options because I don't intend to be induced if bishop score stays that though; have heard far too many horror stories about failed inductions with an unfavorable cervix.

In the meantime I have 10 days to bounce on my ball etc and try and get things moving smile

QuietNinjaTardis Fri 12-Oct-12 10:43:51

Ds came 3 days early of his own accord never mind that I was constantly saying to bump, get out get out GET OUT hth

BedHog Fri 12-Oct-12 10:45:57

Yes some women don't go into labour, that's why we have induction now.

Whatever you do, don't google what happened to them in the past, not while you're due to give birth yourself anyway.

I'm sure you'll be fine, DD showed no signs of shifting at 40+6. By 40+8 she was out and snuggled in my arms.

PinkPepper Fri 12-Oct-12 10:47:11

I felt the same at 40+6 then had my little boy the next day, completely spontaneous lovely waterbirth. Don't give up hope yet! He wasn't even engaged till about 5cm!!

sweetkitty Fri 12-Oct-12 10:50:01

Going overdue is horrid you have my sympathies, Ido however think due dates are not greats women expect to have a baby close to that magic date when in reality some babies justness an extra 2-3 weeks.

Inducing babies that are not ready can be harmful ie instrumental delivers, csections etc.

When I was overdue I just used to think better an overdue one than a premmie in NICU.

DD2 was 12 days overdue, DD1 was 15 days early so assumed I would at least be on time. Did everything to get her to budge, have up in the end and accepted I would be in induced, when she did arrive it wads lovely 2 hour homebirth.

Hang on in there!

JenAT Fri 12-Oct-12 11:05:11

I wonder this too Spice as I went to 42 weeks and 41+6 respectively with mine and gave in and was induced. My bishops score both times with good but labour just never started. The midwife had a right old time trying to break my waters to induce me the second time. Apparently my membranes were v tough! Ds arrived less than 2 hrs later though.

Now pregnant with number 3 and not sure if I want to be induced again but perhaps I just naturally gestate longer than most women, or I cannot go into labour naturally! There is still time for your baby to get a move on though before you have to worry about induction! good luck.x

Northernexile Fri 12-Oct-12 11:08:06

I believe this. I didn't go into labour even after being induced. No contractions, cervix totally closed. I had a CS in the end, and felt a bit cheated tbh- I actually was really looking forward to labour!

Orenishii Fri 12-Oct-12 11:18:02

I think it's also the not knowing - not knowing if you might go into labour spontaneously overnight, or not knowing if another day will pass...it's like a slow torture.

Last week I was so excited about giving birth. This week I am dreading it and feel very depressed. I'm still 4 days away from my due date but this rollercoaster is a killer!

Someone is supposed to be coming to put in a new shower/bath for us - they were supposed to come today, but now it will be tomorrow or Monday. It means turning off the water for the day, and from the moment of the BFP we'd planned on a home birth! Now I'm in a situation of hoping baby holds off instead of wishing it to come, and I think it's done something to me mentally...making me feel worried about going into labour which is exactly WHAT I DIDN'T WANT. I keep trying to tell myself, it doesn't matter - we'll switch the water back on but it's hard to stay rational.

Try and tell yourself - due dates are estimates and if you go into labour spontaneously, awesome. But you also have the benefit of modern medicine to help things along if needed. Either way - you will be seeing your baby soon. i think the thing I take from most womens' birth stories is that in the end, the how really doesn't matter smile

Goldrill Fri 12-Oct-12 13:37:06

DD was 40+13 and narrowly avoided induction. I am now 40+1 with DD2 and my attitude is that she will be here at some point in the next 13 days - and I have taken this approach since 37 weeks. I see every day as equally likely (or unlikely!) for her to arrive and I am planning my time each day on th basis that nothing will happen. So it will be a bonus on the day it does!

Just a small way of trying to stop myself from going quite as mad as last time! In many ways I would prefer her to hang on in there for a few days as I got the whooping cough jab late and the more time she gets to receive antibodies the better - so it's even a positive thing!

sarahpip Fri 12-Oct-12 14:19:25

I am 39+6. I don't feel ready for all of this, despite this being planned! This might not be relevant for those who already have kids but rather than get fed up why not go for a meal or to the cinema. My theory is that being relaxed and happy might br better as i hear stress hormones slow things down ( that could be total baloney?!). As long as everyone is happy that our babies are well, my theory is that we should enjoy what me and dp time we have left!!! Xx

CailinDana Fri 12-Oct-12 14:27:16

Ooh I don't want to get your hopes up but that sense of despair is a good sign! My fellow overdue fed-uppers and I all got to that "Oh for fuck's sake, I'm just going to get the plunger out and do it myself" point just before we went into labour smile I was 40+4 and I remember being in floods of tears to DH thinking it was never going to happen, got home, had dinner, puked dinner up, went to bed and went into labour the next day. Whereas my cousin, who had to be induced at 40+15 and never went into labour despite all the drugs on the planet (had an EMCS in the end), was a picture of serenity right to the end, even though she was so overdue. That antsy almost angry feeling is part of the hormone surge you get just before everything kicks off IMO. Fingers crossed for you!

Orenishii Fri 12-Oct-12 14:35:41

sad

I'm in the hoping-labour-doesn't-start, am a hormonal, irrational mess of not feeling ready/I've made a mistake despite wanting this very, very, very much for about 4 years!

WTF!

CailinDana Fri 12-Oct-12 14:42:50

Totally normal Orenishii. Everyone feels like that to a certain extent I think. It is scary facing into labour, it's a total unknown and there's a lot to worry about, but when it all happens your focus suddenly narrows and you just plough on, because there's not much else you can do really! Once the baby is here you will just do what needs to be done, there's no such thing as "being ready" - you can have all your bits and bobs lined up, all the clothes washed etc but until that gorgeous little person is in your arms you just don't know how it's going to be. You will be fine. Honestly. Late pregnancy is the pits, but you'll soon forgive the world when you see your little son or daughter for the first time smile

Orenishii Fri 12-Oct-12 14:54:53

Thanks Cailin, that is really so helpful smile I keep trying to rationalise these feelings, then realise I can't and just trust what everyone says - in that moment, when our baby is coming, my body will take over and when they are here, it will like nothing else I could experience smile

sarahpip Fri 12-Oct-12 14:59:43

Orenishii I am with you, I am sure that once labour starts our bodies will take over and give us the right hormones that we need. Am positive it will be amazing! smile

Spice17 Fri 12-Oct-12 15:43:14

Thanks for the advice Cailin I'm driving myself absolutely bonkers at the moment, so hoping this frustration be helping in some way smile

I actually feel like my own body is letting me down and almost feel a bit embarrassed about it, silly eh?

I have the same feelings Orenishii, I'm always saying 'come on baby, hurry up!' and then when I get a twinge I think could be it, I say an immediate 'Oh shit!'to myself.

bagofholly Fri 12-Oct-12 17:10:00

Re the op question, yes, some babies will never come out without a bit of help. My lower twin was massive and resolutely transverse (horizontal) and there was no room to move him because of how cramped things were. So no amount of "our bodies are amazing" would have helped. My surgeon was amazing, and out they came via the sunroof. It was only after I'd had them that I looked up what happened before CS was available, and we would all be dead. Thank goodness for modern interventions in childbirth.

whatsoever Sat 13-Oct-12 00:35:58

Am starting to feel my baby is unwilling to shift of his/her own accord. I'm 41+1 and no signs anything is imminent. Even a pretty aggressive sweep on Monday caused nothing more than a bit of pelvic pain - no show or anything.

Had a trip to triage yesterday for reduced movement (all fine and after a scan, 20 minutes on a monitor and movements returning was sent home) and have come to the conclusion I'm carrying a lazy bugger and I will end up being induced.

I suppose this is fairly unsurprising given I was an EMCS at 42+1 after an unsuccessful induction for my mum, but I had just hoped for something a bit more natural. I know it's still possible - induction likely to be Tuesday/Wednesday next week so 4 days left - but I've lost all hope sad.

Orenishii Sat 13-Oct-12 09:04:49

sad whatsoever hang in there for as long as you're comfortable. I don't know how you feel about post dates but YompingJo has posted some very good information over in the due in October thread in ante-natal. And you know, an induction doesn't mean inactive, flat on your back birth either smile

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