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how and when to tell dc we're having a baby?

(33 Posts)
littlepiggie Sat 22-Sep-12 21:18:22

When and how do you tell children? Their 5+6 and I'm only 6 weeks smile

MrsJohnDeere Sat 22-Sep-12 21:28:46

Mine are 4 and 6, and I'm 8+3. I'm going to wait until after the 12 week scan.

numptymark1 Sat 22-Sep-12 21:30:16

leave it as long as possible other wise you will spend the next 7 1/2 months saying 'no the baby won't be here today'

I would seriously try and leave it until around 16 weeks

littlepiggie Sat 22-Sep-12 21:37:29

We were going to try and wait until after 12 weeks at least.

cherrypiew3 Sat 22-Sep-12 21:41:02

Hi mine are 5,8 and 10 I waited until I had my 12 week scan. I am now nearly 29 weeks and ds2(5) asks me almost every day if the baby is coming out now.

AbbyRue Sat 22-Sep-12 21:42:08

Leave it until you're at least showing! We told DS 9 and DD 5 when I was 12 weeks - big mistake!!! Now week 35 and "when will baby come?" is still question of the day

littlepiggie Sat 22-Sep-12 21:44:46

Don't think I can cope with the asking every day lol, their quite good though, they understand order and the baby will be due the month after ds 7th birthday.

monsterchild Sat 22-Sep-12 21:47:06

We waited until I was 12 weeks to tell my 6 yo Dsd. She hasn't asked that much about kidlet, but as I'm getting bigger (due in December) she remembers more and asks. I've just told her not until Christmas, which seems to be fine with her!

jkklpu Sat 22-Sep-12 21:51:58

We did it after the 12-week scan (dcs were 6 and 4). We showed them the scan photos of the baby and also the photos of them at their equivalent scans to show them that they had been the same a long time ago. We said it would be ages before the baby was born (told them in the autumn, the baby was due in spring) and that I would grow a big belly gradually and be more tired, that it was going to be exciting but loads of time away. And that was it. After a few days of mentioning it, they didn't really bother until I was too big to catch them when they ran.

There are some children's books around. My ds2 had one from the library by coincidence shortly before we told them - a wee girl is being bolshy and sad because there's a new baby in the house and it's about how she and her parents work it out. Can't remember its name, I'm afraid.

us4downhere Sat 22-Sep-12 21:52:23

I was thinking this too - my DS's are 8 and 6 and I am 11 weeks...got a scan appt in 3 weeks time so am going to wait until then I think, as I know they will tell everyone as soon as they know!

I'm going to show them the scan photo and see if they know what it is not holding out much hope and then wait for all the "How did it get in there?" questions!

littlepiggie Sat 22-Sep-12 21:53:02

Lol just wait, Christmas stuffs coming into shops

littlepiggie Sat 22-Sep-12 21:56:32

Dreading the how it got there question. My sisters 37weeks, their beside themselves about the thought of a new baby in the family.

CollieEye Sat 22-Sep-12 21:58:39

I left it until I was 6 months. DS had lots of questions, as I predicted, so 3 months was enough. I'd have left it later but the bump was obvious.

He never once accepted that he might get a brother. I was corrected every time. He was positive it was a sister. He was right.

CollieEye Sat 22-Sep-12 22:01:34

Should say, my DS wasn't quite 3 yrs when DD was born. If he'd been older I'd have told him earlier.

Poledra Sat 22-Sep-12 22:06:57

DDs 1 and 2 were 4 and 2 respectively when I was pg with DD3. WE told them at about 15 weeks, when I saw one of the other dads at the childminder's looking specutlatively at me, then my CM told me later he'd quietly asked if I was pg! I didn't want them finding out from other people so we told them at that point. (CM already knew as we had made sure to get the baby's name down for a place with her - she's fab, and much in demand grin).

floatyjosmum Sun 23-Sep-12 08:53:33

mine are 7 and 11 and was going to leave it as long as possible as i had visions of little one being way too excited and oldest one hating it.
But the mornign sickness has been all day sickness and awful and they both thought i was really ill. I had an early scan and told them at 7 weeks.
Luckily due to their age they understand that its going to be a long time - due just after oldest ones bday so not being nagged at!

xx

DinosaursOnASpaceship Sun 23-Sep-12 08:57:52

I am 21 weeks and haven't told my 10 and 8 year olds that I'm pregnant yet. It's not obvious to look at me, and I want yo try and hold off as much as possible before telling them.

Badgerina Sun 23-Sep-12 09:48:35

DS1 is 7 and we left it til after the 12 week scan. He cried initially and was very cross that we hasn't "asked his permission!!!" (Haha!) he soon calmed down though and said "I know how that baby got in there you know, you two!" It was very funny grin

dueatxmas Sun 23-Sep-12 10:12:20

DD is 4 and a half we told her at 16 weeks she cried she was so happy as had been asking for a sibling for ages smile. She's been amazing all the way singing and talking to baby and we've loved involving her. I'd definitely wait till after 12 weeks.

GoldPedanticPanda Sun 23-Sep-12 10:18:55

My DS is 5, we were really excited and DS had seen a lot of our friends babies and had started to ask if he'd have a brother or sister, so we were going to tell him after our 8 week scan. Sadly we mc a day after the scan so now with this pregnancy we're going to hold off until the 20 week scan.

FrustratedSycamorePants Sun 23-Sep-12 11:04:40

I think the younger the child the later you tell them. Children are into instant gratification. So maybe after the 2nd scan, then theres not too long to wait, you have a clear bump, and bubs should be starting to kick.
Also found out that older DCs will tell everyone, especially of sown to secrecy, so this time im only telling dc once everyone important has been told.

kidcrayola Sun 23-Sep-12 11:05:04

My son is 13 so quite a bit older than most of the children in this thread. He was the first person we told 2 days after we found out as we wanted him to feel included in the pregnancy as much as possible and for it not to be about just my husband and myself (I had my son at 18, split with his dad shortly afterwards. Been with my husband for 5 years.....) but about our family growing as a whole.
Thankfully he's been brilliant and is super excited. He's also been along to scans with us.

whatsonyourplate Sun 23-Sep-12 19:32:10

We made the mistake of telling our two dcs (4 and 8) just before going round to my parents to tell them. So as soon as my mum opened the door 4 year old DS blurted out 'mummy's having a baby!'. This was at about 15 weeks, and DD (8) had already asked me if I was pregnant a few weeks before as she spotted my bloated tummy, I fibbed and said it was too much cake!

SlightlySuperiorPeasant Sun 23-Sep-12 19:57:14

We took 2yo DS to a private gender scan at 19 weeks. When we got home he started sorting out his toys into two piles: ones the baby could play with and ones that were just for him smile He's been fine with waiting and is very chilled about a baby coming to live at his house.

ilovecolinfirth Sun 23-Sep-12 21:25:25

We never had the chance to tell our 2 and a half yr old son. He announced it to visitors when I was 7 weeks pregnant and informed me when I was 8 weeks pregnant. at this point I decided to agree with him. To this day, I don't know if he picked it up from conversation or if it was wishful thinking. Either way, hes been very relaxed, tells me all the things he will do with the baby, and is always putting stickers on my belly, or holding baby toys to my belly. Have just turned 32 weeks and he likes to pretend he's cuddling baby. V exciting times...hope he cooed for real tho. X

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