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Pregnant? See how your baby develops, your body changes, and what you can expect during each week of your pregnancy with the Mumsnet Pregnancy Calendar.

Can I be honest?

(28 Posts)
SquealyB Mon 17-Sep-12 16:40:58

My name is SquealyB and I HATE being pregnant.

This is DC1 and I am 21+3. I am tired, emotional, fat, sore, spotty, pyschotic and sick to death of not feeling like me any more. How am I going to get through the next 19 weeks??

I am so excited about being a mum, cannot wait to be meet my baby but I suck at being pregnant. Before pregnancy, I was fun, outgoing, sociable, a night owl, a real foodie etc. Now I hate most food (and most people), I am tired all the time, cannot get motivate at work, cannot stay awake and I am acting like a harpy towards my DH.

God I really HATE feel this way sob.

Amnewtoallthis Mon 17-Sep-12 16:51:30

During my first pregnancy I felt the same as you, as excited as I was about the baby I was fed up with feeling fat, tired and sick. I always thought the second trimester was supposed to be when you 'glowed' - did it hell for me!
But, and you have to remind yourself this, you'll have a beautiful human being at the end of all this. It feels like long now but it won't when you look back, honest. It can't have been that bad, as most of the other women on these boards who are now pregnant with their second or even third! I would take some comfort where you can, are there any friends you can have a real moan with - it does help.
I did find a bit of exercise helped me, even a walk can get you going. Have you tried a pregnancy yoga class?

OddFrog Mon 17-Sep-12 16:51:44

Don't be too hard on yourself - I'm 28+6 with DC2 and I am never doing this again!!! I am terrible at being pregnant and with a toddler it's so much more tiring.

I though DS would be an only after a rotten pregnancy with him sad. Still, He is the most wonderful child and I am so glad I persevered through the exhaustion, food issues, heartburn, blood condition, birth problems... and I wouldn't change it for the world. This time around I'm just reminding myself that it is all worth it and baby will be amazing.

You'll be fine too and you might even do it all again someday!
thanks to keep you going for now. Try and have a few treats, hug your DP when you've been truly awful and let him hug you sometimes too.

sammyleh Mon 17-Sep-12 16:56:08

Oh you're not alone hehe... not at all!
It's the 'oh you'll miss your bump when she's here' comment that get me. No I wont, bugger off! I can't wait to be able to eat what I want, bend over without pissing myself or take more than ten steps without having to stop and breathe. And like you, I literally cannot wait to be a mum and cuddle my baby girl, she'll be worth it all x

Dogsmom Mon 17-Sep-12 17:34:06

Me too!!!!

I am not enjoying this pregnancy lark at all and I'm only 16+2 weeks, I feel so guilty admitting it because I'm so excited about being a Mom but the sooner March 9th comes the better and as for the thought of labour I'm terrified........

FruitSaladIsNotPudding Mon 17-Sep-12 17:36:26

Oh god, me too! HATE it.

But, trite as it is to say it, it is worth it. It must be, this is my 2nd!

SquealyB Mon 17-Sep-12 17:39:38

Thanks all - just feel so darn awful most of the time at the moment. It is nice to know I am not alone and that it is worth it!

whatsoever Mon 17-Sep-12 18:17:54

I'm with you. I'm 37 weeks & have hated most of my pregnancy. Various symptoms have left me inactive, fat, slow, mardy, retchy, queasy, and generally miserable.

I feel something approaching hilarity when people tell me how great pregnancy is, how feminine they felt etc. It's crappy. Hang in there - we're all in it for the same reason.

abcde1 Mon 17-Sep-12 19:24:33

Hate it too.

I hated it first time around but told myself it was just because work made it so hard for me to be pregnant, I was commuting and working crazy hours etc etc. But no. I hate it this time around. I am impatient and want it over. I want to eat decent cheese, drink (more than one glass of) wine, and not be expected to coo over every baby I see...

And those smug pregnant women who stroke their bellies in a mother-earth sort of way make me want to heave. smile

Sazzel Mon 17-Sep-12 19:38:15

Oh me too, I'm 25 weeks tomorrow. Grumpy, needy and pathetic! Can't wait for it to be over but freaking out at the idea of being a parent.

Nearly cried the other day when I discovered that DH and I now weigh exactly the same. shock Plus I've got another 15 weeks of weight gain to go whilst his is on that fasting 5:2 diet, which also means that 2 nights a week I have to cook my own dinner and not moan about it because I'm trying to be supportive and not sound like a horrible lazy wife grin

exiledmancityfan Mon 17-Sep-12 19:40:00

I hate being pregnant too. I am having an ELCS on Thursday and cannot wait smile I am fed up of feeling like a beached whale who cannot get comfortable and getting up to go to the loo at least 1,000,000 times a night. This is DS2 and will most definatley be my last. I have even told DH that he is not getting any until he has had the snip (not that he has had it in awhile)

milk Mon 17-Sep-12 19:44:37

Me too!!!! I feel so blessed to be pregnant and love this baby so much (DC2) but I truly despise pregnancy!!!

I'm now at 38 weeks and every 5 minutes I'm moaning at someone that I want it out sad With my 2 pregnancies, I found weeks 20-30 were the best, as I had more energy and wasn't too big yet.

How is the baby shopping going? Have you chosen a pram/stroller yet?

IWantToGoToThere Mon 17-Sep-12 20:01:36

I found it much worse the first time around. This time around I know what's waiting at the other end (both good and bad!) and this is our last one so I'm actually enjoying being pregnant much more this time. Still looking forward to being able to drink as much as I want and not having to pee every 45 minutes though.

MJP1 Mon 17-Sep-12 20:26:58

Me too Im 20 weeks with 1st so excited about meeting my gorgeous bub but have hated and hate being pregnant, the nausuea, the tiredness, backache, moods, migranes, veiny boobs, not being able to sleep, stressing about anything and everything, nice to see im not the only one, we'll get through this lovelies xxx good luck

MB34 Mon 17-Sep-12 20:38:53

Me too, I've not been as ill as some people but certainly haven't had the 'glowing' stage - been constantly tired throughout it all and it's killing me!

This is my first and have seriously thought of saying, just after the birth - while you're down there, tie me up so I never have to go through this again!

jennybluetree Mon 17-Sep-12 21:30:34

Yep - I'm 39 weeks and I can totally agree with all the above! I'm also sick of everyone only talking to me about babies, birth and horrific childbirth stories - a little goes a long way and its getting boring now!

Most of my childless friends stopped inviting me out about a month ago too sad

JugglingWithPossibilities Mon 17-Sep-12 21:39:09

God, I loved being pregnant !

I think I have some attention deficit traits and those pregnancy hormones did wonders for my ability to focus, feel like me, and feel positive smile

Just be glad that you feel so good the rest of the time !
I only got to feel that good for two lots of 9 months - ( and first 3 months not so great with pregnancy sickness)

Hope things start looking up for you soon though OP smile

Leftwingharpie Mon 17-Sep-12 21:44:01

Yep it's rubbish, nothing to be said for it I've already had quite enough - and I'll be the first to admit I'm having a relatively easy time of it and with no other DC or responsibilities. Tbf it does make you realise how lucky you are to be well and fit the rest of the time. Always assuming I'll ever get back to my old self afterwards... which I'm starting to doubt.

VegemiteSandwich Mon 17-Sep-12 22:33:43

Oh, I HATE it too. The most depressing thing was realising that I'd hit third trimester, and with that lost any chance of the whole second-trimester blooming thing.

Work is being awful, too, so pretty much my whole second trimester has been spent dealing with that.

Sometimes spending time with pregnant women can help, sometimes not (especially if they are the sort that are actually enjoying themselves envy ). Luckily, though, every single friend who already has children has been sympathetic to my plight which has been very kind of them (especially since they know what is in store!!)

RecklessRat Tue 18-Sep-12 05:09:09

It's pants.

I had no idea of the world of wonders that awaited me..... The constipation, the insomnia, the heartburn, the constant need to eat, the aches, pains and niggles and just how bloody uncomfortable you feel. And all that after getting through 3 months in the first trimester that felt like a crap hangover EVERY DAY.

And I count myself lucky that I've had a pretty easy pregnancy (so far) no major problems or worries, some have it much worse.

And why does it have to go on for SO BLOODY LONG?!

Ah well, rant over, back to the toaster (my 5am friend).

Thumbwitch Tue 18-Sep-12 05:27:36

Same here. Am 36w with no.2 and hated this pg even more than the 1st one, because it's been worse. I'm 5y older, I've had more nausea, worse acid reflux and been soooo much tireder. I don't "bloom" in pregnancy, I don't enjoy being kicked in various sensitive areas and I'll be very happy when the baby is safely out!
I've had to inject myself daily with Clexane (anti-coagulant) since being 4w pg, I have to keep on top of the SPD, I can't sleep properly or comfortably at night due to intense hip pain after not too long - it's not exactly a barrel of laughs.

And the moods!! Homicidal at times, really down at others, depending.

Yes it's all worth it but bloody hell it can be hard going getting there!
Still. Had 3 MCs between no.1 and this one, so it must be worth it or I wouldn't have kept trying smile

stowsettler Tue 18-Sep-12 09:14:27

Pregnancy is shit. 18+6 here and the end can't come too soon - although I haven't had a particularly hard time, I think, it's just a shit condition to be in. No booze (I mean what's the point of just one?!), no runny / smelly cheese, worries about the slightest niggle. I hate it too.

ValiumQueen Tue 18-Sep-12 09:53:27

Pregnancy 1 was ok as work was great, and I was fairly well, with just me to look after. Traumatic birth so swore I would never do it again.

Pregnancy 2 was harder. New work, 3yo DD, not so well with SPD and dreadful heartburn. Worry about birth, greatly eased by promise of ELCS, but with that came an element of guilt. Birth fab! Swore I would never do it again.

Pregnancy 3 not that bed to be honest. Having a 2yo and breaking my leg did not help, but I finished work much earlier and SPD has barely affected me. I am 34 weeks now, and do not enjoy pregnancy, but it is so very worth it.

I was told at 26 I would not be able to have children, but had my first at 37. I am now 43, and I am sure being older makes it harder.

Whenever I feel fed up I allow myself to think, just for a moment, what it would be like to lose the bellydweller, and that is more unbearable than any symptom or restriction could possibly be.

This too will pass!

dontcarehow Tue 18-Sep-12 11:36:00

I think a lot of you have had it worse than me (either that or I've got a hell of a load of crap to come) but I hate it too. Obviously not the baby part, I love him/her already and would not change it for the world. but how the hell did our species manage to survive for so long when it feels this awful to add to it?! It really is just one discomfort after another. This is my first and I've already decided I'm not doing it again!

ratbagcatbag Tue 18-Sep-12 12:55:13

Thank god for me finding this, I was about to post something similar.

I'm 12+1 with DC1, and I've got my scan on Thurs which I am excited and nervous about (first scan I've had).

I'm fed up already, not with the thought of a much wanted baby, but I don't do ill well and all I've done is feel crap, not much being sick (well until today and my boss sent me home) but feeling sick every waking moment, I am off all food apart from weetabix of which I am having two bowls a day, I've even lost a couple of pounds, although not too worrying as have a high BMI anyway.I am constantly knackered and in bed and when I get up it's back to feeling sick, I did think I was nuts feeling like this.

I'm a busy person with Uni to do, athletics teams to manage, full time job and I feel that I am doing nothing because I have no energy.

And (whilst I'm ranting away) if one more person says "oh I didn't even have so much of a hiccup, it was lovely, how can you not be enjoying it" I will kill them in a slow lingering way (if I can obviously stay awake to complete the task).

So happy (if that's the right term) that I'm not mad and there are others like it!!

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