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welcome to the new SPD sofa, have a [biscuit] and a [brew]!

(318 Posts)
sillywmama Sat 19-Nov-11 18:26:27

Hello all... just thought I'd start a new SPD support thread for anyone dealing with the whole achy fanjo/painful back/ridiculous inner thigh pain. I'm 9weeks pregnant and am settling in for the long haul. <fluffs up pillows and pops a paracetamol>

I have to confess I'm feeling a tad emotional that the pain is ALREADY here again but at least I'm better prepared this time! Last preg was spent flipping between teeth-gritted stoicism and hysterical wailing tears. No fun for anyone!

Taking enormous doses of codeine and hobbling around on crutches is something I'd like to avoid this time round so I'm going in all guns blazing for a consultant led care plan, pain clinic appointments and physio ASAP.

Anyone is welcome to join me! <puts the kettle on and hands around the jammy dodgers>

PamBeesly Sat 19-Nov-11 18:46:54

Hi Sillywmama thanks for starting this sofa! I was having really awful pains in my pelvis, so difficult to walk, agonising turning in bed at night, inner thighs feel like they'll break away. I told my GP this and she said it was stretching....I told my MW who said SPD and has booked me into see a physio! It really hurts to walk but I'm a first timer so have no other kids to mind. I wonder how everone else does it, it must be torture.
I have only taken paracetamol so far, the symptoms really only started 3 weeks ago (I'm 26 weeks now)
silly do you find anything helps? I really don't, just resting (on the sofa) and not moving much until I have to go to the toilet helps! My job involves helping customers so I'm on my feet a good portion of the day. I'm still doing yoga, I really like it for the relaxation and breathing but I don't know if its doing me damage with the SPD. I have already gained 2 stone too so I'm sure the extra weight isn't helping but my exercise has really done down by 90%.
I hope your pain isn't too awful tonight. You are only 9 weeks gone....I really hope it settles down for you. How many children do you have?

sillywmama Sat 19-Nov-11 19:08:58

hi PamBeesly welcome! Well, I wish you weren't having such a rubbish time, but welcome nonetheless...

I actually did find some things helpful so let me have a think (please add anything to this list fellow SPD survivors!)

- Get an exercise ball, sit on it comfortably so you feel stable; then roll yourself gently forwards so that your feet are flat on the floor, shoulder width apart with your bum slightly forward on the ball (not in the centre). Once in this position you can gently practice pulling in your bump (engaging your pelvic floor) and trying to return your spine to a neutral position (straighten it by rolling on the ball back - as if you are sitting 'deeper' onto the ball, in the middle of it). Return to the start and repeat about 10x morning and night.
- Get up! Don't sit still all the time. It won't help you stay mobile. I had a digital timer and I set it for 45mins when I was seated, at work or at home. When it goes off, get up. Walk around, stretch and think about tucking your bum in as you walk. SPD makes you waddle early and this waddle is usually because your spine is a tad too curved and your bum sticks out. Think about pulling it in because this will engage your glutes, which are one of the main muscles that hold your pelvis together. The more you engage them the more stable your pelvic girdle will be.
- Don't over-do standing up jobs. Set your timer for 15 mins if you are going to wash up/hang out laundry/clean up stuff from the floor/change the sheets on the bed. When it goes off, STOP. Have a ten minute break before you carry on. It's much better to do little and often than push yourself and be in agony for a day.
- Get a sleep pillow (like dream-genie, but there are other cheaper versions if you google). Something that you can put between your knees, under your bump and around your back. Keep your knees a little apart when you sleep if at all possible.
- Keep said knees together when you get out of bed/get out of a car etc. I used to have 'do it like a lady' (with Robin Williams in drag) in my head. Yep, sounds mental but it made me think about it! lol
- Put a plastic bag on your car seat to help you swivel in with your knees closed.
- Get some satin sheets or satin pajamas so that you can slide around in bed more easily and avoid the grinding too much. You only need either/or sheets/pajamas. Both is a bit boudoir!!
- Don't push a shopping trolley or buggy if you can help it.

MOST important of all:
- Get a proper pain clinic referral. DO NOT accept your GPs advice re pain control in pregnancy, they are not experts and cannot give you the best advice. I couldn't walk at 20weeks last time and didn't get a proper pain management program until 35weeks, by which time I was mental with pain. The maternity hospital should have a pain specialist you can see - badger your midwife/GP for a referral asap.
- The Red Cross gives free mobility aids. I know it's rubbish and scary but actually if you have crutches/a wheelchair/a stick for a day out you will help yourself to avoid the spectacularly ignorant comments such as 'you're only pregnant love'.
- Physiotherapy is very helpful for some people. My NHS physios were well meaning but crap (no offence any NHS bods reading this, but they were!) and sent me packing with a list of useless exercises, a belt that didn't fit, and the untrue statement that it would 'resolve entirely with the birth'. I saw a private physio for 7 months after the birth and definitely did need to. But I found someone who specialised in SPD and did manipulate my joints, which was very useful for me.
- TALK to the people who support you. I adopted a bit of a 'grit your teeth and bear it' attitude which was very unhelpful. My poor DH didn't have the foggiest idea what I needed and was appalled to discover I was in so much pain, when he could have been helping.
- Get informed about your condition:
or have helplines and are staffed by lovely people.

I am sure there is more, but that's it off the top of my head!

I hope it helps smile

sillywmama Sat 19-Nov-11 19:13:53

oh and if you want a decent support belt that doesn't look ugly under clothes, I recommend the Serola belt

Go for large/extra large unless you are a twig, so you can fit it under your bump.

PS don't panic about 2st. I gained 5st last time due to the sudden end to all exercise (I used to run/cycle etc 3-4 times a week before I got pg). The massive weight gain was also partly due to depression, caused by pain, which I treated with MnM's. Again, see the point above about getting to a pain clinic!! Codeine is more effective and you won't get fat smile

PamBeesly Sat 19-Nov-11 19:19:24

silly thats excellent advice thanks so much, I really don't have it as bad as you have or as bad as it was for you last time. I don't want it to get that bad either, sounds awful. I'm getting a gym ball from Argos on Monday so I'll do those exercises, sounds a bit like yoga, when the teacher tells you to tuck your spine in. I find myself walking with a waddle so I'm going to try tucking my bum in.
I lay on the couch when I get in from work because I'm so sore from go go go all day but now I'll know better, thank you.
Excellent tip with the satin pyjamas, I have to wake my husband sometimes and ask him to come around to my side of the bed and help me up because its too painful, other times I use my elbows.
If anyone said 'you are only pregnant love' I'd have strong words with them! Some people are so ignorant.
I actually live in Ireland silly so instead of NHS I have the HSE which is really slow, however the midwife I saw at the hospital yesterday (I had to go in for steroid injections to mature babys lungs) told me she'd make an appointment on Monday for me. She also said try keeping your legs together when dressing, not to over stretch your groin (like I could!) she also said GP's have little awareness of it. Thanks for all the advice, I hope yours isn't too bad now

PamBeesly Sat 19-Nov-11 19:22:32

Pain is very depressive and really underrated as a cause of depression (at least here it is) I still have 14 weeks to go (hopefully he doesn't come early) so I hope I'm not going to get to 5stone! I used to walk everywhere, walk the dog three times a day but now thats gone. I had a 30 minute walk today and I can really feel it in my pelvis, its just searing. Thanks again for all the advice smile

sillywmama Sat 19-Nov-11 19:32:48

you are most welcome PamBeesly it's hard bloody graft having this problem no matter how mild/severe. I agree about pain being depressing.

I don't know how you feel at the moment in yourself, but I know that with the pain, I felt a little cheated. It probably sounds funny to anyone experiencing a 'normal' pregnancy, but really it was such hard work, and I was so fed up. As it was my first pg I didn't know what to expect and I too was told that it was normal to experience 'stretching' pain (it's not normal to be unable to lift your foot up to put on your trousers, or to not be able to walk! I know this now).

I had several colleagues and friends who were pg at the same time who seemed to breeze through. I'm sure they had their own ups and downs, but I don't think I allowed myself permission to feel sad until recently. It is sad when something so wanted, and anticipated, turns out to be so hard. I don't think that makes me ungrateful or a bad mum - but I sure did think that at the time.

This time round I'm going to be positive, and take charge. And I am glad that at least I do know this time round that it WILL end eventually, and the wee baby will be so worth it smile

GOOD LUCK! I really hope that you get some relief. Please do get a referral for pain relief support, it is so important. Your little angel needs you to be as resilient and rested as possible when they arrive, and if that means you have a little help to feel comfortable then you are absolutely looking after both your interests!

mediawhore Sat 19-Nov-11 19:38:30

Oh I'll join.

34 weeks, 3rd child, huge amounts of pain.

Lower back/hips and a bruised feeling down below. Can't stand or walk for very long. Have to get my eldest and husband to put my boots and socks on for me.

On codeine and crutches and signed off work until maternity leave kicks in.

So bored as been off for 2 weeks now and can't do anything. Just want baby here so pain can start to go and I can sleep/walk/move/function better.

And I know the feeling about colleagues breezing through. A woman at work is 6 weeks behind me and breezing through (her first) which makes me feel even more pathetic/a let down.

Just so so so so so fed up of the pain now.

PamBeesly Sat 19-Nov-11 19:40:26

silly completely agree with you with regard others experiencing 'normal pregnancy' I was almost embarrased to have yet another pregnancy complaint. I had awful itching from week 8-16 that caused me to pull the skin off my legs and arms, I was diagnosed with Polymorphic Eruption of Pregnancy, it was so difficult to do anything because I was getting maybe 2-3 hours sleep a night max, my body was ravaged by tiredness. I was prescribed piriton and that helped somewhat. Luckily I can sleep now.
Then I had a bad fall at 20 weeks and was bruised and battered for a while. Then just yesterday I had a really bad reaction to the flu vaccine. I became tachycardic and couldn't breathe. I had to go to the hopsital for monitoring and got the steroid injections there to help babys lungs along in case he arrived early. I'm back on piriton 3 x a day. Sometimes I feel, no one else has said anything, that I'm coming across as a hypocondriac in pregnancy, thats why I wasn't surprised when the doctor said the pain was stretching. It really isn't though. When I tell anyone I feel I get an eyeroll. My mother just says, her grandmother had 25 children, not one of them in a hospital...I feel like I'm being self indulgent but I know realistically I'm not.
Thats why mumsnet is great! A textbook easy pregnancy the next time? I wish!

sillywmama Sat 19-Nov-11 19:54:55

Hi mediawhore <waves and passes a nice hot brew> put your feet up my lovely. I remember it so well - I had crutches/codeine last time too, not exactly something to look forward to! Do you find the codeine helps? It took the edge off, but didn't 'fix' it. If it makes you feel any better, I did find I could manage without the crutches within 4 weeks of the birth. And with the arrival of diclofenic (post birth) the inflammation went down considerably. Although it's boring, it's good that you've been signed off for the time being, struggling on through is so miserable, is there anything you like doing to keep yourself busy? Or could you visit someone who would pamper you lots (your mum maybe?)

pam gosh what a hectic time you've had! You poor thing! Pregnancy is as mad as a bag of frogs. I was having the worst time of my life while my best friend barely even knew the baby was in there til she got a unbelievably tiny beautifully neat little bump around 7mo. Take heart - it really will be over before you know it. And in the meantime, moan away! It helps to talk x

mediawhore Sat 19-Nov-11 20:12:15

Teas for every one else too.

I am keeping busy by sleeping a lot (kids at school/childminder), hobbling round Tesco for junk food (which is painful but I'm a pig), Doing jigsaw whilst bouncing on my ball (which has been a godsend!) and watching crap TV whilst surfing the net.

Am glad of here as think everyone else in the world is sick of my moaning now - at least here we are all in the same moany boat!

sillywmama Sat 19-Nov-11 20:37:46

lol - I thank god for mumsnet. I'm only 9 weeks and rubbing my poorly sacro-illiac joints as we speak. YAY. Can you imagine how bored my RL friends would be if I chewed off their ears for the next 7months??

<sets sail in the good ship moany - destination, babyland!>

notcitrus Sat 19-Nov-11 20:43:02

Hello again! 27 weeks tomorrow with dc2. SPD-wise I'm a lot better than last time when I was in a wheelchair to go any further than local bus stop, as I can walk what used to be a 10-min walk to nursery, and back, twice a day - as long as I don't do anything else that day!

Physio was very complimentary about my pelvic floor and tummy muscles yesterday, but we're trying to relax thigh muscles and strengthen glutes without hurting anything - she's convinced it's my better muscles holding me together better this time.

On the minus side, I've become intolerant of codiene. sad
Taken a full 60mg dose four times in the last month and twice been really sick, and last night only 30mg made me sick this morning.
Given I have buggered shoulders which the NHS osteopath doesn't seem to be helping (need to see if my private guy can be used instead), I could really do with some painkillers!
And still light-headed and exhausted etc, with what has been diagnosed as 'unpleasant pregnancy' - a highly technical term! Supposed to be working from home after being signed off for most of 3 months but it's not going well - 1 day of 4 busy puking, one just fell asleep mostly. Can't wait for maternity leave.

MrNC is being fab, keeps pointing out that I'm growing a baby and he can't, but I still feel crap that I can't do anything at the same time as gestating. sad

sillywmama Sat 19-Nov-11 20:49:53

Hi notcitrus! please accept a brew with a side order of sympathy. And congrats on your improved muscles, I'm impressed! I am harbouring no secret hopes that mine are in better nick lol. The fact that I've pooched out immediately now suggests they are practically non-existant in my stomach smile hey ho! And may I say, YAY for no wheelchair! If I could happy dance I would!

on the codeine front though... that sucks enormously. Have you been given any further advice? I hope they find you an effective alternative asap.

notcitrus Sat 19-Nov-11 21:11:40

Will book a GP appt next week, but suspect I'll have to see a consultant for anything other than low-dose codiene. Might see if the pharmacist has any tips.

It may be a pain in the arse (literally!) but given I had really bad pain in early pregnancy I was hugely worried about how I'd cope if I was rationed to 300 yards or less of walking a day (mainly, how to get ds off to nursery 4x weekly - one day a week of mainly being in the house is fine for him!). Being allowed about 2 miles now makes life feasible.

Will see how I am after Christmas, but I'll be on mat leave then and another folding wheelchair (ie can get on the bus with it) will be OK if needed - I know where to order it from and also how to fend off patronising comments (wear maternity-size Iron Maiden t-shirt...) I live 100 yards from a bus stop with buses every couple minutes, so it could be much much worse!

Let's just say the exercises I'm diligent about doing are the ones that can be done lying down in bed. smile

sillywmama Sat 19-Nov-11 21:43:56

haha smile me too.

Did you know if your GP signs confirmation that your SPD is likely to be significant for 6+months you may be able to apply for a disabled blue badge for that time? As I had it from 16 weeks to 9mo post delivery last time I'm going to bring that up with my GP at my appt on Weds. Def recognise the hot pain in my pubic bone area and the back pain has never really resolved, so its worth a shot. If I can't drive to work I'll have to stop much earlier than I'd like, as it's a 20min walk with no direct bus sad

harassedandherbug Sat 19-Nov-11 21:57:19

I'm in a v similar situation to mediawhore. I'm 35wks with dc4. Been on crutches and cocodamol for months now. Signed off work 10days ago, its such a relief! Physio was pants, so have been seeing a chiro which is good but temporary and at £25 a go I can't afford it constantly.

Still hoping for a home birth but consultant said I could be induced on due date if I want. That's 22 Dec.....

notcitrus Sat 19-Nov-11 22:05:52

silly - I did (not in time to get one last time though, but as I couldn't drive it wouldn't help much - I got the bus everywhere anyway!). I have a disabled railcard anyway and if I can get round to it will be sending off a DLA application form soon, again for other reasons. Though given how many people are being rejected for DLA atm, I keep thinking I shouldn't bother but I've been told to apply so many times over the last 10 years...

Last time I was fine by 3 months after - they said to come for physio if not better in 2 weeks, and a bit after 2 weeks i went in saying the pubic bone is OK now but there's this other pain all over my pelvic area etc.
Chap gently explained I'd not used any of my bum or thigh muscles for 6 months and needed to build them up again - that was all! 30 min walking a day, 5x weekly, then postnatal exercise class from 6 to 11 weeks, and got the all-clear.

Hoping to get my nice MLU birth this time - it was lovely last time until I had to get out of the pool after 8 hours. But as long as we can avoid the postnatal ward I'll be happy.

sillywmama Sun 20-Nov-11 11:08:38

notcitrus I couldn't drive last time either, I passed my test when DS was 5mo and I am so glad I have it now. Not driving + toddler + poorly hips sounds not fun sad good on you for braving the bus! How do you get on with pushing a buggy? Does your DC need one still?

I had a traumatic forceps emergency delivery last time, in lithotomy position in theatre, which def didn't help my pelvis to recover. DS was early and though I had a very detailed birth plan, with how far I could abduct my legs etc written in, I don't think anyone had time to read it in the event! This time I'm weighing up the options with a birth trauma midwife to see whether I opt for an ELC or try again for a natural delivery. I have some other damage from the last time (sorry if TMI guys) which is a factor. I hear you on avoiding the postnatal ward. I was in 5 days last time, which seemed very long.

welcome harrassedandherbug nice to meet you smile hang in there! December will come round super fast. And you never know, baby may arrive bang on time and save you the trouble!

notcitrus Sun 20-Nov-11 11:59:21

Ds is 3.2 and can walk long distances fine - just if he stages a sit-down protest I can't get him up or carry him, so after a couple months hardly using the pushchair, I'm back using it again after a few nightmares getting him home from nursery - he's now exhausted in the evenings as Preschool is clearly running him ragged in a way Toddler Room didn't.

Buggy is not bad as long as I go slowly and hold myself upright - our 10min walk home is now over 20. Telling ds he could get home quicker and have a biscuit if he walked hasn't convinced him so far! Only problem is when people decide to be 'helpful' and pick up the other end when I get off a train and knock me off balance - strained the pelvis the other day and it's taken a week to recover.

I ended up in theatre expecting a cs but they agreed to try a ventouse just to convince me we'd tried everything. They had my bed 45 degrees sideways and three blokes holding me on it, said on the count of 3, you push, we pull, and then everyone went OH MY GOD THERE'S A HEAD! Two more pushes and there he was - not turned round or anything, just couldn't be arsed to move during the previous 29 hours... But he did then need anitbiotics and so we had to stay in for 3 days. First night horrible, but then I was off the catheter and drip and epidural and could pick up ds and hide in the breastfeeding room watching Bollywood movies all night, which wasn't so bad.
They were very good about keeping my knees together - also helped that I had MrNC and another birth partner or two to help haul me about. Plus probably the whole hospital's supply of pillows got involved!

So hopefully I can go to the MLU again and dc2 will condescend to descend a bit more rapidly. If it weren't for the needing resusitating and the enormous amount of mess, I'd go for homebirth, but the MLU is great - like a spa hotel only decorated on NHS budget! Also means my parents can be at my house with ds if I start labour in the night and don't have to go to theirs immediately or try to keep him out of the way.

mediawhore Sun 20-Nov-11 13:08:54

I am so glad that I can still drive, but it helps that my car is an automatic so little actual movements and quite a high car so getting in and out not too bad.

If I had my old car I would be stuck as need to take my youngest to the childminder still and wouldn't be able to walk it.

I am hoping to go into the MLU too - but I also want as many drugs as they can force into me, though not had epidural before so may be able to stay in the MLU (if it is open).

I just want b aby to come 2 weeks early - that way the pain will be over sooner AND I can enjoy Xmas without the worry about having to go off to hospital.

Coppernoddle Sun 20-Nov-11 16:06:10

Hello all, just thought I would donate my experience of spd! I hate it! And still hate it now my baby is 3 1/2 months old!!!!

All I can say is, if they give you TWO crutches, USE THEM!!!!!!!!

I was extremely bad and the use of a wheelchair quite often, this was my third, never had it before, extremely fit, and now my pelvis has rotated and struggling to get it to realine. When ever I walked, I only used the one crutch due to carrying bags ect, and think that was a contributing factor! Also couldn't exercise at all due to grade 4 pp, so excersise is definitely important!!!

Good luck everyone! It won't be long!!

notcitrus Sun 20-Nov-11 16:43:38

I only drive about once a month anyway (we debate selling the car every time the insurance/MOT/tax payment comes round), but the one movement I really can't do as soon as SPD kicks in is pushing down a pedal. So if you wonder who in the antenatal loos is leaving paper towels on the side rather than putting them in the pedal bin, that's me. Sorry.

I can't use crutches because of my crap wrists and shoulders, so apart from a walking stick (more useful as a magic talisman to get a seat on the bus/train than actually moving!) it was straight to a wheelchair for me when I needed to go a long distance.
If your hospital or Red Cross aren't obliging or don't have any self-propelling ones, I can recommend - they will deliver to your door if needed but are incredibly helpful!

SlightlyScrambled Mon 21-Nov-11 13:19:35

Hello everybody. I'm pulling up the newly inflated birthing ball and having a seat here beside the sofa! 32 weeks with baby no.2.

I have to agree wholeheartedly with PamBeesley about SPD and depression. It took me a few weeks to come to terms with doing nothing for the rest of the pregnancy.

I've found the exercises to help enormously but still have the really bad days. I slipped on black ice last week and although I luckily didn't fall, it did take me 2 days to get walking somewhat normally again.

I just got my birthing ball today and am not sure what exercises, if any, to do on it. Some of the videos on youtube were saying to spread your feet apart but that's not much of an option for me. How do you use yours?

kiki22 Mon 21-Nov-11 13:37:11

Can i just say i feel like my fanjo is going to pop apart! so good to be able to say that!

I'm on my 9th week of sick leave with 10 weeks to go and i feel like i'm going mad in this house also feel really guilty for not doing enough even though i know i can't do things without being in pain i still feel bad i can't.

DP pointed out that people are tortured by inflicting pain on them and depriving them of sleep which is exactly what happens with SPD it hurts and stops you sleeping.

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