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Pregnant with 3rd- older mum. Huge panic.

(6 Posts)
JackyJax Wed 19-Oct-11 06:29:51

My husband and I dithered around for 2 years trying to decide on whether to have third bub or not. I found out yesterday I'm pregnant and I am literally terrified.

My head keeps saying 'what have you done'? We're due to move back to England in June and both our children (age 5 and 7 in June) would be at school. I was planning on working a couple of days a week then having a couple of days to do some uni courses.

Now I'm panicing that I've done the wrong thing. What was I thinking? I will be 42 (nearly 43) when bub is born and husband will be 50. He never wanted a third but did it for me- he's a great guy.

Please, please don't judge me. I feel really weepy and scared. A part of my wants to smile and think of my 'little bean' but another part of me is so scared.

A big part of moving back to UK was to have family support. Can imagine someone in our family looking after our 5 and 7 year old but not also a baby.

Any supportive advice really really appreciated. Thank you so much for listening.

tadjennyp Wed 19-Oct-11 06:52:14

I don't know whether to congratulate you or to give you a virtual hug! I had my 3rd recently (have just turned 39) and also live abroad so I know what it is like to have no family support. You can still do your uni courses a couple of days a week. Campuses often have great nurseries. I am sure you will adapt to a third marvellously. My third is a wonderful addition to our family. Good luck with everything JackyJax.

localcrackpot Wed 19-Oct-11 09:40:50

Don't panic! I have friends who had children a good few years after you. You already know you can do this smile all will be fine. Your DH loves you and if he really didn't want another he would have made it clear; people don't hold back about children.

Think about your little bean! You can do this and you will love it! Think of having another little snuffly newborn in your arms and enjoy smile

JackyJax Wed 19-Oct-11 12:04:33

Thanks so much for your messsages of support and thanks for not judging me. It all feels so huge at the moment. I really appreciate you taking the time to reply.

tadjennyp Wed 19-Oct-11 17:37:15

Localcrackpot said it much better than me! (I was a little tipsy at the time blush ) Think of that snuffly newborn and what a gorgeous addition to your family he/she will be! You can do it!

notlettingthefearshow Wed 19-Oct-11 19:39:22

It's so normal to feel a bit panicky and hormonal. But it all sounds fantastic. I know several new mums in their early-mid forties and they are fantastically happy and wonderful parents. You have a loving family all waiting to greet your little baby. How lovely for baby!

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