I need some advice! I Iam 12 weeks pregnant but I have had 3 missed miscarriages in the last year so havent felt too hopeful. I have had 3 scans already, the last at 9+4 and all were good. I am meant to have my scan next Wednesday when I would be 13 weeks but due to complications that is likely to be changed but wont find out when to until Monday. It could still be next week or the week after.
I am thinking of booking a private reassurance scan for tomorrow but it would cost £100!! I do have a dd aged 6 years and I feel the stress of not knowing what they will find is terrifying me. I am so sick of going to scans to find the heartbeat has stopped and not sure I can wait much longer before collapsing in a quivering heap! It might be a complete waste of money if all is fine but I know I will feel better.
We are not well off so the money will be hard to cover. DH is away so cant ask him what he thinks although I know if I said the wait was driving me insane he would support my decision.
Waste of money. You can't set a precedent for yourself that will cost 100 quid a time. If your NHS scan goes well will you stop worrying or will you always have in the back of your mind that you could just go for another private one? It coud turn into a very expensive habit. I totally get what you mean about being a wreck, I've had my 12 week scan, have anothe rmonth til my 20 week one and I still worry. But you need to relax.
I wouldnt worry so much after 12 week scan as you can then feel baby moving etc so you know if something has gone wrong. Its this horrible feeling of putting life on hold for a week and the horrific waiting in the waiting room (as scan will be at end of day on nhs) not knowing what they will find.
The thought of that is whats worrying me. I am just so fed up of waiting to then be told bad news.
As you have already had an early scan I would advise you to hang on until your routine NHS scan. As someone who is pregnant after 2 mcs, I can understand how you are feeling, but if you have had a good scan at 91/2 weeks your chances are hopefully better this time. If you were only 8 weeks I would say go for it if you have the money, but as you have reached 12 weeks now, I think you should wait. Good luck!
You'd think that karenb, but this is my third, I'm 16 weeks and I still haven't felt definate movements yet, which adds to my worry, so it won't stop after the 12 week scan ime. I do sympathise, but I think you should hang on. If money is no object of course then go ahead.
Just out of interest...why is it you say wait? Is it the money? Or risk of too many scans? If I was rich I would def have it just to stop my mind going crazy and can enjoy being pregnant for a change. I might have to wait another 10 days for NHS scan whihc is a long time off.
It is the money, but also the fact thta based on what you've said I think you may find yourself having more than one private scan, so it becomes a crutch, and an expensive one at that. I don't think it'd truly reassure you.
I agree I would have to seriously curb myself not to become addicted but quitre frankly we couldnt afford it. I just hate this waiting thing especially now they have messing with my scan date. I could have held on until Wednesday but now they dont know when it will be it has turned my emotions upside down! It could be the week after for all I know.
Yes I spent ages looking into that today but given I am so early that may actually cause more anxiety if I can not find a heartbeat. I am a little overweight so heard thats harder to find then. I will get one for later but just need to reduce the anxiety now.
Hi, I know how hard it is not knowing what the outcome is, especially when you've suffered from recurrent mc's.
As you've had 3 mc's in a row are you being seen by a consultant at your EPU or miscarriage clinic? If you are, then I would call them first, and ask for an extra reassurance scan as you're worried. My EPU were very understanding about all the mc's I'd suffered and agreed to give me scans every week after week 9.
If I hadn't been offered scans at the EPU, then I would have definitely paid for scans, but really that is a decision you need to make based on your circumstances. After my 10 week scan, I bought a doppler and would listen in to the baby from week 11 a few times a day for reassurance. If it hadn't been for the doppler, I could see myself paying for extra scans.
When I was preg, I had a scan at 7 weeks and then again at 11 weeks and then my '12 week' scan at 13 weeks. I was terrified of going to my 12 week scan and there being nothing there. This I know stems from having a miscarriage previously and it helped for me.
I do think £100 is expensive (can you find anywhere cheaper?) but if it is an okay scan and makes you feel reassured then money well spent. And if it turns out to be bad news, then £100 will be the least of your worries. Sorry, don't mean to sound crass!
Best of luck, here's to a healthy and happy pregnancy. (and mine worked out too, my DD is nearly 2!)
I am being seen by consultant at some point but not at miscarriage clinic anymore but becuase had pre eclampsia first time round. I dont think they will give me one at EPU as no bleeding or seirous pain. But I will def speak to them about getting extra reassurance scan between 13 and 20 weeks.
Think I will invest in doppler too.
Wish I could be more relaxed but had pretty tough pregnancy with dd and then the 3 mcs finished me off, plus sibling death in the middle.
So no real emotional reserves left..hence I think I am going to have the scan tomorrow.
Oh, and re Doppler, I considered that too but heard horror stories about woman getting freaked out because they couldn't find heartbeat because they were looking in the wrong place etc. Too much added stress if you ask me!
i had 4 rmc and had to wait for my normal dating scan on the nhs. epu would only see me if I was bleeding, even though all my mc were missed and i didn't bleed with any of them.
I paid for a scan at 6 weeks so that i could start a treatment programme and then again at 13 weeks. It was a stretch financially but it really helped to ease my concerns.
in your position I would just wait for the nhs scan, you have had 3 good scans and although I know that is not a guarantee, it does look like you have a very good chance of a successful pg this time. I would save the money and buy some nice baby things later on in the pg