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In Bra Agony... every bra I wear is killing me... advice please!

(38 Posts)
lalababy Mon 03-Oct-11 13:03:41

I have gone from a 34 C to a 38DD and am dying here! Bascially just got measured (again!) and it seems that it doesn't matter what bra I choose... mama's & papas, M&S, John Lewis... the bras just keep hurting around the band. Even when the band is loose it somehow cuts and is red/raw it. Given that I am currently a 38DD free hanging isn't really an option. Ideal would be some type of support vest that doesn't have a band under the breasts... anyone know where I can get something like this!


Roseflower Mon 03-Oct-11 13:11:23

Ok they aren't attractive, or even specific maternity bra's.. but these are heavenly as they have no underwire to cut into you. I cannot recommed enough it was such a relief to find them

The Doreen Triumph bra.

Im a G cup, and (normally a E )and these are the very best I have found after going through hundreds of bra's that I would end up in agony in....

ALotToTakeIn Mon 03-Oct-11 13:14:40

I have found bra extenders a life saver as was also in agony with bras cutting in but couldn't get on with buying bigger chest sizes as they then cut in under my arms. Have gone from a 32D to 32F+ 2 inches of extender in nice soft bras from debenhams.

idlevice Mon 03-Oct-11 13:15:10

You could try phoning a specialist online retailer for advice on this - look for bras4mums or on the web & email/phone them. I have used the former for advice & they were great.

BedHog Mon 03-Oct-11 13:21:56

I just go braless - have gone from a 30C to somewhere around 38DD, but they are so 'solid' that they just kind of stay put. Have to make sure I wear a top that doesn't show nipples though, so have raided DP's t-shirt drawer!!

The bands are ridiculously uncomfortable - make me breathless and in pain, even with soft bras. I didn't have this problem with DS - wore normal underwired bras for the whole pregnancy.

Franchini Mon 03-Oct-11 13:27:59


They have a bra measuring tool and are really comfy

KatyN Mon 03-Oct-11 13:49:03

can you get to a bravissimo?? I've found them splendid when getting bras to fit..

it also might be that you've rubbed your skin and now anything is aggrevating it.. can you do a day off (work from home?) and allow the skin to heal before putting anything else on it??

lalababy Mon 03-Oct-11 14:02:16

Hi all... thanks for the links... will try all of them one by one...
Will call bras4mums and try and get to a bravissimo too!!!

bedhog Don't really think I can manage going braless to work... although I am tempted!!!

GetThePartyStarted Mon 03-Oct-11 14:22:52

I would be very surprised if your back size has really changed so much - a lot of bra places increase back size too much when they should be increasing the cup size. agree that you should try a bravissimo, and perhaps an underwire (it is fine to wear an underwire as long as it is fitted properly), I have mahoosive boobs and found that without an underwire everything cut in too much but with one it was fine.

All of the brands you mention are notorious for being terrible at fitting, so definitely worth trying bravissimo, I would guess maybe an underwired 36f would be more like it.

Good luck!

daenerysstormborn Mon 03-Oct-11 14:25:02

i went from a 34d to 34f with dd and ended up wearing sports bras which i found quite comfy compared to normal ones.

LadyWord Mon 03-Oct-11 14:26:59

OP you need this

I discovered them during my last pg and they are AMAZING - unbelievably, totally, amazingly comfortable - so much so that after being pg and breastfeeding I couldn't go back to a normal bra, I'm still wearing them. They are non-wired but carefully shaped, very stretchy yet firm support. There is a band, but it's wide, soft and stretchy and doesn't rub or dig. Large will fit you.

LadyWord Mon 03-Oct-11 14:28:06

Oops just noticed the price on that page - don't pay that! You can get them for £29 in John Lewis or have a google around.

LadyWord Mon 03-Oct-11 14:30:06

here's a better link with some reviews.

Grumpla Mon 03-Oct-11 14:31:09

From a 34 to a 38 back sounds wrong to me unless you have put on a huge amount weight all over. I went from a 34E to a 36J at one point (horrendous!) but still found a couple of decent bras and was fairly comfortable. My back size only went up in the last month or two of pregnancy and returned to normal pretty much instantly, obviously my cup size changed dramatically but that makes sense, it was the actual boobs that got bigger not the ribcage they were sitting on!

I would go and get measured again, preferably Bravissimo or a small independent shop staffed by ancient ladies with massive boobs. You can trust them smile

You definitely want something without underwiring. The most comfortable and supportive one I've found so far is the Vanity Fair style 535. Simply Be do them mail order with free returns so you can order a selection to try. They are very 'granny' style to look at BUT they give you a very nice, round, perky shape under your clothes which is the most important thing!

Grumpla Mon 03-Oct-11 14:32:33

If you can't get measured, by the way, I'd start with a 34F or thereabouts...

Oeisha Mon 03-Oct-11 18:33:53

Somehow I think they're just fitting you wrong (def. complain to John Lewis, they should be doing a better job, and should be accepting a full refund on your bras). John Lewis try and stick me in the next backsize up, but that give me cup sizing issues - the cup I need to get round my breasts is too large for the base of my breast if they do that (very round). And I find the bra wiggles/lifts when I life my arms - implying that it doesn't fit properly. So, I always ask for the 32 (though now I'm on a tight 34 [tightest hook] to give me the choice to let it out if I'm too hot/my previously broken ribs are playing up).

Have a look at the information on the Bravissimo perfect fit guide as it has lots of information on how to 'diagnose' issues with bras. I'd start by popping on you OLD bra and going form there. If you can still fit it round you that is. If you can, you def. haven't gone up 2 back sizes.

For a long time, I've purchased some bra extenders so make my bras last a bit longer. Not needed them yet - Bravissimo did an excellent job fitting me, though I'm beginning to find the pattern of the cups on my boobs when I take my bra off.

You don't need to go into non-wired if you've got the right bra and right fitting. Bravissimo fitted me into Alana and Daisy Chain as I'm very round. Both comfy and practical and no so ugly on you can't ever imagine having sex again. I def. won't be going out of underwires...

Def. visit bravissimo and get fitted. Tell them what you want and they'll cater for you...

katherine2008 Wed 05-Oct-11 08:25:25

I have some elle mcpherson & Royce feeding bras from last time which are comfy and also amazed to find that mothercare feeding bras in the 'Correct' size are comfy too. I can't wear M&S, John Lewis at all. good luck.

ArmageddonOuttahere Wed 05-Oct-11 08:34:42

I am in your shoes cups, OP. Every single bra is torture and the skin is maddeningly itchy as my norks are expanding so fast. 34F from 32C

I'm wearing yoga bras night and day now - Primark were doing them for tuppence a while back, although they had none in when I went in to stock up at the w/e. Very have similar

They're stretchy, soft and supportive. Bras can bugger off until I need nursing ones.

Oeisha Wed 05-Oct-11 08:43:15

aarmageddon Either your figures are the wrong way round, or you've lost weight and cuppage! confused

ArmageddonOuttahere Wed 05-Oct-11 09:08:58

I do get numbers muddled up (discalculia apparently blush )so it's probably that! Definite trifle-and-pregnancy induced growth here grin

Oeisha Wed 05-Oct-11 09:24:15

Yup. my sympathies. Dyslexia and dyscalculia here so I often get things backwards.
No sympathies over the trifle, just jealousy. All my LO will let me eat without feeling shite is fruit.

notcitrus Wed 05-Oct-11 10:05:54

I went from 34/36DD/E to 40G when I was last pregnant, and I only put on a stone and a half!
So it's possible to go up that much in the back.

OP - can you put aqueous cream or something where it hurts and maybe go braless for a day or two if you're just pottering round the house?

I spent an hour trying on various of M&S non-wired bras this time and have ones that fit pretty well.

kiki22 Wed 05-Oct-11 11:18:22

the maternity physio told me not to bother with maternity bras and get a good sports bra with adj straps. not attractive but feels great and you don't need to worry about knocking yourself out running up stairs.

i am a 36GG pre pg was 34F so know a thing or 3 about bras for bigger boobs!

Grumpla Wed 05-Oct-11 11:41:45

I am still a bit sceptical that you would put on that much on your back measurement notcitrus - eight inches around your ribcage is an awful lot bigger and a stone and a half is not a lot heavier at all - Unless you were carrying incredibly high up and this forced your ribs apart / put on pounds and pounds of 'back fat' it just seems unlikely especially as you "only" went up two cup sizes at the same time.

if you have larger boobs, you will find that loads and loads of bra places fit WAY too big on the back and too small in the cup - this has happened countless times to me. I got "fitted" in M&S as a 38 back not that long ago - twas ridiculous, the back was somewhere up round my neck in about 30 seconds, the underwires were cutting right into my boobs at the sides and underneath, boobs spilling out of the top. Daft woman didn't even notice this when I asked her to check the fit for me so I stormed out and went back to trusty old Bravissimo.

You only have to look at how many women you see out and about with that hunched-over four-boob thing going on to realise how endemic this problem is! Size wise there is not much difference between a 36DD and a 34E, in my non-pg state I could easily wear either of the two but the fit would be quite noticeably different.

If the waist band is digging in at the front that suggests to me that the cups are too small, boobs being pushed forwards and to the middle and the weight of them is kind of 'folding over' the band (iyswim - quite tricky to describe this without groping you making hand gestures) so instead of it being a thick band of elastic supporting the weight of your boobs evenly around the rib cage you end up with the back riding up, a lot of pressure on the front and a very thin rolled elastic band cutting into you. Underwires do this too - when early on in my pg my boobs suddenly got bigger I noticed because started getting red "U" marks under them from the underwires being pushed out at the top and the bases tilted in against my ribcage.

OP if you are already sore then a new bra will probably still irritate the same sore bits (ouch!) but once you are healed up a bit (have you tried some Kamillosan or similar?) then please do persevere and find something that fits - if you are not used to big boobs you will also be a stranger to the backache that they can give you if not properly supported and that is NOT something you want to be dealing with on top of all the other aches and pains!

Grumpla Wed 05-Oct-11 11:43:51

YY as kiki22 says don't feel you need "proper" maternity bras, a decent sports bra or non-wired bra will often give you much much better support. Although not as pretty <sigh>

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