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Has anyone ever actually enjoyed their labour?(22 Posts)
Perhaps "enjoyed" is too strong a word. However I'm going through "the fear" at the moment regarding giving birth. I know most people will have heard this all before but I'm really terrified about the pain. I happened to catch a programme called Desperate Midwives yesterday, and even though I usually can't stick reality TV, this show actually put my mind slightly more at ease. There were quite a few births on it and most of the women just looked bloody knackered as opposed to writhing about in abject agony.
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Well all of mine (4) have been OK actually - I know it is not a popular thing to say but there it is, it just wasn't that bad at all. The first was a bit of a shock because she was a bit early (36 weeks) and it was a bit of a shock but I don't labour for long and have only used tens and gas and air for the last couple of bits - in all cases the pushing bit has been very quick and I have been active all the time I was in labour. For me this has been the key - I haven't even been relaly knackered and always been very in control of it all - they have all been home births apart from the first.
That said, each time, I have had 'the fear' a couple of weeks before I think, shit, this baby has to come out of me! - even though I have done this so many times it still happens to me so I think the fear is normal.
Keep on your feet, that is the key and stay positive - if it were that bad why would people do it more than once! You will be fine.
I had an epidural with both my DSs and especially with the first one (as they seemed to top it up more) the pain I can honestly say was not so bad. I remember at the time giving it a 5/10 for pain.
All I can say is be open to drugs. Some people are able to take the pain and give birth naturally - great if they can - and others need some help. Its not a bad thing to take them.
Don't worry gegs73, I am absolutely open to pain relief of any description! I actually overheard a women recently on the bus talking about when she gave birth. She said that she didn't feel "validated as a woman" because she had accepted pain relief. I have no such qualms. And considering that I am already a woman, I feel completely validated in being one.
I was induced with a synto drip and it's meant to be extra-painful. It was really painful and I had gas and air and diamorphine but it was the best experience of my life. I'd do it again tomorrow. I felt great for week afterwards and although undeniably sore it was totally fab. Like that light energised feeling you get after a big poo only x100 and it lasted for weeks. Brilliant.
LoL. It's good to hear positive stories rather than all the horror ones.
''Like that light energised feeling you get after a big poo''
I was only saying to dp last night I bet it feels like having a really good poo.
Bloody knackered rather than agony sounds about right to me!
I rather enjoyed my first 6 hours of labour at home - like period pains only less bad (probably only applies if your periods were seriously disabling...), and then the next 10 hours in the MLU were great, comfy bean bags to kneel on followed by the pool which was wonderful. When else can you get your partner to massage your neck for 6 hours straight??? And feed you grapes?
It then went less well as other medical issues meant I had an epidural and then it was simply long and tedious until the magical 'pop' moment!
Can't wait to do it again - mostly as this pregnancy is being very hard work.
I was induced with a drip and hated the process and all the sodding rigmarole that went with it, but what kept me sane was knowing this was 'it', and that in a few hours I would eventually get to meet my baby.
Honestly, no. But not because labour itself was something to fear but because I went into it with unrealistic expectations of myself. I thought having drugs was 'giving in' and know now I was an utter idiot. When I finally ended up with an emcs (both times round), I'd reached the point of complete exhaustion/fear. And it would have been avoidable had I been less stubborn.
Mostly, your body is designed to do this. There are things you can do to encourage your body in this process. If for whatever reason you find that you are struggling or in unnecessary amounts of pain, there are plenty of highly qualified people who are there to help. Denying your body relief is foolhardy as I learnt the hard way.
You sound like you have a fabulous attitude to it all and while I can't guarantee that you'll 'enjoy' it, the baby you produce will shock you to the very core in terms of how much you absolutely fall in love with him/her.
I enjoyed the first part of my labour before i was put on the drip because i wasn't progressing fast enough. Despite initially hoping for a homebirth (i changed my mind because DD was predicted to be a whopper!) I was actually quite frightened at home while i laboured overnight and found that really painful. Got to hospital the following morning and in the care of a fantastic student midwife i felt safe and relaxed. My fondest memory was of laying in a warm bath with the gas and air having stonking contractions (which i was very noisy about without at all meaning to it was more a kind of release i think) and the most amazing adrenalin rush after each one. A truly empowering experience to feel my body doing this amazing thing! Unfortunately as i got tired and was then put on the drip i felt more out of control and didn't enjoy the rest of it.
Thanks NationalTruss. I think I'm extra worried because I'm of "advanced maternal age", i.e., 40, and this is my first.
It was just boring more than anything. I stopped dilating at 6cm so on to the drip and epidural put in after 18 hours. Up until then I was coping fine with gas and air but getting very tired. Once the epidural kicked in I had a little nap, read some of the Alan Carr book (he now reminds me of labour), sent DH to tesco for snacks, watched a bit of Telly, chatted. It was quite positive as I was so aware of everything but rather it have been shorter.
Bloody loved it!! Had 2 babies vaginally so far (3rd booked for a c-section in 3wks - boo!).
1st baby ended up with episiotomy & forceps & 3rd degree tear
2nd baby totally fine, just gas & air, but another 3rd degree tear (hence c-section this 3rd time).
But I thoroughly enjoyed both labours....yes the contractions 'hurt', although hurt is the wrong word....but my god that high that you get when you've pushed your baby out is amazing. People think I'm mad when I tell them to enjoy labour, its the best experience you'll ever have, but I really felt like that after both births.
Defo don't be too 'brave' to accept pain relief help - i.e. epidural. I really should have had one with my 1st baby but was enjoying the gas & air too much, got so knackered trying to push him out, I ended up having last minute spinal block & forceps. I really should have just had an epidural way sooner & I might not have got so tired.
And as my mum always says - you wouldnt have a tooth extracted without some sort of pain relief if it was hurting, so why go through having a baby totally naturally if you're in pain? GOod luck, you'll love it I'm sure!!!
I can honestly say I didn't enjoy!
I was left standing in delivery room and I had to send my husband to get someone because I felt baby is poking out.
Then nurse comes and asks are you sure? I almost said her something nasty... but fortunately MW came, checked me and I was 10cm open.
So I had no pain relief of what so ever.
I wanted to have an epidural but MW said doctor wouldn't be able to come for another 20 minutes because he was in the operation room... so I had no choice than to start pushing baby for the next 80 minutes.
At this point I had gas and air.
After episiotomy we finally managed to get him out.
I can tell you that I would have probably enjoyed more if I had more drugs
I was induced with ds1 and spent most of the labour wallowing in a lovely big, warm bath. I got to 9cms that way then transferred to the delivery room for him to be born. The only bit that I remember really not liking was when he was crowning. I remember telling the midwife that it was really stinging and she replied that that was the most polite way anybody had described it to her in a long time!
DS2 - waters broke in the middle of the night, started having a few twinges about lunchtime. I took ds1 to softplay (DH came too) with some friends who we used to meet with weekly. I had my TENS on. I laboured on the sofa there with hot chocolate and chocolate cake until things suddenly ramped up a gear, so we left pretty quickly, took DS1 to PIL and went to the hospital where DS2 arived 5 minute later!
Not too bad really!
Lovely thread, thanks ladies, am 38 weeks today and feeling rubbish, can't stop crying and I don't know why and I am so worried about the birth. I also moved house on Saturday and there is stuff everywhere and the toilet is blocked, none of which is helping! But I've enjoyed reading this thread and it has made me feel a little bit better :-)
I'm glad it's made you feel better MrsCLH. Me too!
I had my first baby 2 months before my 40th birthday.
You'll be fine
Mine wasn't as half as bad as I had imagined it would be.
I was induced due to having OC, I spent the first half of my contractions walking up and down the unit, managed to get to 5cm when I asked for an epidural. It wasn't as bad as I thought, mine felt just like a sharp pain (like when you need a poo!)
Spent the rest of the birth in a nice, toasty delivery room with DH watching the snow fall outside. Laughing and joking with my lovely midwifes, then 5 hours later DS was born with an assisted delivery due to having a mahooooosive head and being slightly the wrong way.
Am currently 21 weeks and am rather looking forward to it.
I also had the fear for my first, not really good with pain and was terrified of not coping but surprisingly I can honestly say I found most of the actual labouring quite exhilerating. You just don't know how you'll be but your open attitude already puts you in a good position. It is not competitive and I feel sorry for the slightly deluded first time mums who want or expect a particular type of experience, they are sadly setting themselves up for regret.
My second was in the birthing pool. The water really did help with pain relief. my third (pending in two weeks) will be a c-section so a new experience for me.
Good luck. Be open. Try to relax and not think about what you are doing. Oh and staying off your back is pretty helpful if thats an option
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