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Anyone else really scared about money?

(7 Posts)
SoBroken Wed 24-Aug-11 10:09:03

I'm due in 8 days and my husband is self employed so if he takes paternity leave, we basically go down the toilet. I thought I had prepared for this by saving and paying this month's rent in advance, but of course something has gone wrong.

He hadn't set up a direct debit properly when we moved, so unbeknownst to us, the car insurance got cancelled. This meant we had to restart it (with a big payment) and pay off money we thought we had already paid. It's screwed us so much that we literally haven't been able to go to the supermarket for food this week and are living on scraps from the freezer.

Added to which the main place he works for (where we get the majority of our money) have a work experience boy in, and have been letting him do the jobs my husband would normally do for extra cash, because of course they don't have to pay for the work experience boy. I am so angry about this, they know we have a baby on the way and are deliberately letting my husband miss out on extra money.

If baby came today, I just don't know what we'd do. We have several big bills to pay next week so even if baby holds off til then I'm not sure how we're going to eat. I have an older DS who will need to be looked after if I'm in hospital and ... this just isn't what I wanted.

We have scrimped and saved so much over the past few months so that DH could have some time off to spend with the new baby, and it's just gone. My mum has said she will take some time off, but she can't have much as she's on a temp contract and won't get paid either.

Sorry, I know there's no answer to this, but I can't really discuss it with anyone here as DH is under enough pressure and there's nothing I can do to change it. Just wanted to put it down really. Thanks for reading.

KatyN Wed 24-Aug-11 12:09:17

Money worries kept me awake for a LONG time when we first found out I was pregnant.
We have a really strict budget at home where every penny of our salaries is accounted for. I had to go through it again with a fine toothed comb and see how we would cope without my salary while I was on mat leave and what levels of scrimping would need to be done.

Have you tried talking to the council/benefits agency/citizen's advice to see if they can offer any advice.. They might be able to help you negotiate paying your bills in installments, or just checking you are getting everything you are entitled to?


MrsHuxtable Wed 24-Aug-11 12:28:25

I'm really sorry to hear you're so worried. It's extra stress you really don't need when your baby is due any day but I guess just talking about it can sometimes help.

Is this just a temporary situation for the next couple of weeks or will this be an ongoing issue when you are on ML?

If it's temporary, is there anyone you can ask for help? If it's a more permanent problem, you'll have to be super strict about budgeting. I know it sounds so silly but I don't have an idea what else you could do. Just keep posting here. Things tend to work themselves out.

My boss has really been disadvantaging me financially ever since he found out I'm pregnant but after a trip to the CAB I'm not worried anymore. I know now exactly (well, kind of) where we're standing. It really helps to make a plan in writing...

vickibee Wed 24-Aug-11 12:32:59

You will receive extra benefits (CB and tax Credit) once the baby comes.
My DH is self employed and I know how difficult it is to budget when there is fluctuations in income. We can go weeks with no £ from Dh as he is on 30 or 60 day payment terms.
Are you getting SMP or maternity allowance?

melliebobs Wed 24-Aug-11 12:35:05

im 14 weeks and allready money has been the biggest headache in our household and the cause of several arguements and tears (mainly mine)

pruney1977 Wed 24-Aug-11 14:54:48

Gosh, you must be so stressed out. Are there no family members around that could do you a food shop, possibly instead of a baby gift?

Changing2011 Wed 24-Aug-11 14:57:35

We are the same, last night my DP was nearly in tears trying to work out how we will manage - I earn more than him and his employer is crap with money (small business). I bet he wont be able to take any time off either when the baby comes. To top it all, I havent been with my current employer long enough to qualify for maternity pay so I will have to claim SMP off the government, just another headache for us to sort out! If only I could have fallen pregnant before I left old job (10 years service) I would not have had to worry. But this baby is unexpected so we will just have to get on with it and try not to let it ruin our second pregnancy and the joy it should bring. Hugs to you.

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