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how long after the birth will you be discharged?

(12 Posts)
pantspantspants Sun 07-Aug-11 14:09:36

Hi, I'm currently 33weeks pregnant with DC3.
With DD1 I had a normal birth, went home 8 hours after the birth (minimum stay, in line with hospital guidelines) and was very happy to, even though midwife did advise a longer stay.
With DD2 I had a longer more painful birth @ 37+1 weeks but requested to go home asap, midwife was keen for me to stay but discharged me after 6 hours (again minimum). I didn't bond well with her and only wanted to go home so I could be with DD1, couldn't get over the fact had only just started mat leave and couldn't spend the time with DD1 I had planned before the birth with DD1. Eventually got over this and love her very much now but at the time could see past the negative. I think had I listened and stayed in I might of bonded with her more.
With this pregnancy I planned to stay in for the night to bond. since the last births the hospital guidelines have changed so there is no minimum stay ad midwives are keen to let you go ASAP. We had a tour yesterday and was told in no uncertain terms that if i had a normal birth I would be discharged as soon as paperwork was done and would return the following day for hearing test. This included births in the middle of the night. I explained to the midwife why I would want to stay and was told I still wouldn't be able to stay because I would be blocking a bed.
So now I don't know what to do, is this normal with all trusts? What are the reasons why you would have a longer stay? Apart from a complicated birth or epidural.

Thumbwitch Sun 07-Aug-11 14:11:41

Depends as well if you wish to breastfeed - I did, and therefore wasn't allowed to leave until I had established reasonable latch and they knew DS was feeding ok. So - he was born early hours of Tuesday morning, I had to stay in Tuesday night and Wednesday night, was allowed home on the Thursday. I had no other complications (apart from having been induced, so I'd actually been in since Sunday evening).

Sandra2011 Sun 07-Aug-11 14:23:54

Even my son was born 3 weeks early we got home 24 hours later.

I could have stayed longer if I wanted but I cannot sleep in the hospital due to all the traffic and noise all through the night (even we had a private room).

tigana Sun 07-Aug-11 14:30:11

low birth weight
delay establishing latch for bf (although ime hmm)
post-partum haemorrhage
C section

none you'd really wish for.....

Birth #3 won't be same as birth #2 ( or #1) and who knows, this time you may sail through and be gagging to get home within the hour

EdwardorEricCantDecide Sun 07-Aug-11 14:38:07

Why don't you arrange for older kids to stay with a relative for a night to allow u to bond with baby so even if you do get sent home right away you'll still have an empty house to concentrate on new baby for a while.

nannyl Sun 07-Aug-11 14:42:38

do you have a midwife unit you could use instead?

ours doesnt make you go home if you are not ready!

catsareevil Sun 07-Aug-11 14:46:37

There is never any real minimum stay, as a competant, mentally well adult can leave hospital any time they like. There isnt any real way for you to insist on staying in hospital if there is no clinical need.

pantspantspants Sun 07-Aug-11 15:09:09

We don't have family close or anyone willing or able to have DDs overnight, neighbour is coming here when I'm in labour.
I'm not sure if I want to breastfeed, with DD2 I fed her to try to bond but have horrid memories of forcing myself to do it. feeding her made me feel worse towards her but, because I have fed both babies I was told yesterday that as long as they saw a feed then we would be leaving.
The midwife unit is connected to the hospital so no real option to go else where unless, we travel 40mins plus on crash/traffic prone roads.
Feeling like this ones going to be as difficult to bond with as well as I cant change the situation, just felt like if we started off differently then bonding would be different.

allthefires Sun 07-Aug-11 15:14:58

I think you need to talk to your midwife. Explain how you are feeling.

Just because you didn't bond last time doesn't mean you won't this time. Its good you are aware of it though.

I'm expecting dc2. I'm hoping baby arrives when dc1 is at his dads. If not yes I will be wanting to rush home. I don't quite know who will look after him yet and also don't want him feeling pushed out.

hollyw Sun 07-Aug-11 15:24:11

How old are your first two children? I would get a couple of DVDs, maybe a few new toys, colouring books, a new baby doll and some nappies maybe, and keep them for when you come home. Maybe get some grown up DVDs for you to chill out and watch when DC1 and 2 are in bed.

Make sure you have some ready meals/precooked meals in the freezer that your husband can just stick in the microwave/oven. Get lots of snacks in for you and the children. Make sandwiches in advance and freeze them too. Then you can come home and plonk yourself somewhere with baby and your husband can muddle through with cooking and looking after everyone. If you feel you need one on one time with baby hopefully the other two will be entertained for a bit with Dad/activities, equally you might find that the other two children want to fuss over you and the baby and you can all snuggle up and watch a DVD together.

It might not work out perfectly - there might be frustration and tears muddled up in amongst it all but it could be worth it as a back up option if you don't get to spend a night in hospital.

xx

Fresh01 Sun 07-Aug-11 19:47:15

I stayed 5 nights with dc1 as had a PPH, 24 hrs with dc2, 12hrs with dc3 by my choice as it was very noisy. But in the 18 months since dc3 was born both the hospitals near me have changed to a 7hrs discharge policy if a natural delivery with no complications no matter if it is your 1st or 6th child. I am having 4th in dec. You get a bath after delivery but once you and baby are checked over you are sent home from the delivery suite not even a ward. Breastfeeding makes no difference here, a midwife comes out to you once a day for the first days to help with that. I have had 2 friends have no.3 and asked to stay but got told no and sent home. It does vary in different areas as I know friends in other parts of uk who get to stay longer.

Hope you have a different experience this time round.

Poweredbypepsi Sun 07-Aug-11 20:25:34

I have been really worried about this. I have had blood pressure problems with my previous pregnancies and 2/3 days after birth my blood pressure has skyrocketed so high that with dc4 my heart started beating irregularly etc, I was fine with some tweaks to medication but since I was already at home it was scary and it meant gogin through the gp which was hard esp as i dont drive so it meant various taxi rides whilst feeling like crap.

I am really hoping this time that they will keep me in 2/3 days it has happened each time I have given birth so it is really pretty likely to happen again but I have heard the same as above that they send home quickly now if you have a normal birth - all of my labours so far have been quick so im really worrying now as i had hoped that they would be able to keep me in to control my blood pressure there rather than try to do it at home.

I will have to see what consultant says obviously but i was h oping that since last time i did end up unwell they may agree.

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