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Feeling quite panicked about c section

(15 Posts)
Boosaphena Fri 15-Jul-11 20:10:18

Am due to have dc3 in October by elcs. It's the right thing to do as I had nasty complications last time, but I'm beginning to get really worried at how I'll cope after dh goes back to work. I'll have dc1 who's 3.5, dc2, who'll be 19months and then a newborn. I'm not a shirker so I'm not worried about having 3 children - I'm really excited about that-buti don't heal well and I have no local family support.
My mum came to stay this Wk as I've been bleeding and having contractions and been in and out of hosp. I assumed she'd take over while I was at home, do dinner etc... But I was still cooking every eve, doing everything for the children and instead of feeling rested I feel even worse with terrible cramps. My poor dh looks like his job is going to be put at risk so bless him he is trying to comfort me and say he'll be here but in the real world if he's starting a new job (please god) it's just not going to be all that possible.
I don't know what I expect from this post, I just need to get it out of my head.
Did anyone recover super quick from an elcs and feel v capable?
Thanks, boo.

Rootatoot Fri 15-Jul-11 20:17:04

Boo - I don't have any CS experience (yet! might be on the cards soon but seeing how it goes) but I wanted to respond just to say I'm sorry you're feeling panicked. It's natural, especially with your DH's job stress. We have been through that too but you just have to take things step by step. He hasn't lost his job as yet. Just cross each bridge as it comes. What i would say though is that maybe you need to talk to your Mum. Great that she came to help but is she the type where you have to be more direct and ask her to do xyz? My Mum is lovely but she waits for me to ask for help, which I'm not good at.

There are those on MN who have mentioned quick recovery from CS. I have read a few threads of late, as I am curious too in case I have to have one.

apple99 Fri 15-Jul-11 20:21:20

I have heard many times how women seem to heal quicker and are more calm with elcs than emcs as you haven't had to labour exhaustively first.

I think you will cope because you have to. In the run upto your elcs you could stock up your freezer with meals that your family enjoy so you don't have to worry about preparing meals in the first couple of weeks. Do you shopping online and see if you have any friends who can pop by and entertain the 2 older dc's even if it's only for 30 min's at a time (on way home from work etc). It makes all the difference.

It is so easy to worry about things we have no control over, I am currently 35 weeks and am already worrying about going overdue or having to be induced as my dd1 is starting school first week of Sep and I want to be 100% there for her and not in the hospital waiting to give birth!

Wormshuffler Fri 15-Jul-11 20:22:30

After 10 days I was pretty much self sufficient, except for not being able to pick up toddlers. Will DH have a couple of weeks off paternity leave?

pushmepullyou Fri 15-Jul-11 20:23:26

I had an elcs in March and recovered very easily and quickly. I had some (fairly minor) pain for the first 48 hrs but this was quite easily controlled by painkillers. I was slow and a bit uncomfortable walking for the first couple of weeks, but by the time my DH went back to work I was basically fine. I also had a 2 year old to look after so not much chance for daytime rest etc.

pushmepullyou Fri 15-Jul-11 20:23:28

I had an elcs in March and recovered very easily and quickly. I had some (fairly minor) pain for the first 48 hrs but this was quite easily controlled by painkillers. I was slow and a bit uncomfortable walking for the first couple of weeks, but by the time my DH went back to work I was basically fine. I also had a 2 year old to look after so not much chance for daytime rest etc.

pushmepullyou Fri 15-Jul-11 20:24:41

Sorry, not sure why that posted twice. Bloody phone!

pushmepullyou Fri 15-Jul-11 20:24:44

Sorry, not sure why that posted twice. Bloody phone!

ShowOfHands Fri 15-Jul-11 20:26:27

I had an emcs after a very long labour and a lot of intervention so quite a long way from elcs BUT I was discharged after 12hrs, had no pain and no need for pain relief and was physically very well indeed straight away. I think this is probably one end of a spectrum but it's perfectly possible that it's not the traumatic recovery you'd imagine. An elcs in particular is a calm event without the preceding labour.

I'd put in place as many things as you possibly can. So meals frozen, nappies and wipes etc in each room, piles of book ready for story time while bf/ff. Lots of things you can eat one handed left out ready for when you feel hungry/the older children demand. Accept all offers of help, ask for more help and don't do anymore than you feel ready to. It might not be as terrible as you imagine. DC1 should be able to understand the basic concept of you needing help and can probably help you out more than you realise with fetching/carrying.

Listen to your body and let it heal in its own time. Take the painkillers if you need them. Please don't imagine the worst though, merely prepare for it. grin

bibbitybobbityhat Fri 15-Jul-11 20:29:16

I was coping fine for my dh to go back to work 2 weeks after my second c/s.

Is your mil around? Is she less useless than your mum? Could she come and help you out a bit perhaps?

Boosaphena Fri 15-Jul-11 23:07:47

Thanks for all your replies, as soon as I posted I re read what I wrote and gave myself a talking to, I can prep food in advance, I can do a list of favourites on ocado/tesco and I'm sure my friend will collect stuff from butchers for me if I ask. I've already booked a cleaner for the day before I go in and will book her weekly so at least I know the hoovering is happening weekly!
My mil is worse then my mum, but I think I do need to be more direct with my mum-I just feel uncomfy about it as she can be a prickly character. Dh will take at least the 2 weeks if he can, it's all so job dependent.
Thanks again for the replies

Bohica Fri 15-Jul-11 23:18:33

I've had 3 elcs due to health reasons & recovered really well, definatly up & moving about by the time DH went back to work (1 week).
We had no family help & like you & others have said you have time to plan & freeze meals, meal plan for jacket pots & simple meals.

My sections were peacefull & dare I say it enjoyable. I had dates & childcare in place & it wasn't scary like emcs as in I knew what was happening & the staff were not rushed.

I healed well & got back on track with my 3 very quickly & I'm sure you will do to!

MummyAbroad Sat 16-Jul-11 14:55:33

boo I am glad you started this thread, I have been worrying about the same thing myself. I have no family near and no DH either, and a 3 year old to look after. I am paying for a full time cleaner/cook/nanny though, and am hoping that by knowing the date in advance will be able to make enough preparations to make it all work. I am also hoping that it turns out to be like a lot of things in life where the anticipation and worry before hand is actually worse than the reality itself. I suspect that when it happens and we are left to get on with it we will be fine, but the worrying before hand is quite hard to cope with!

Its good to hear all the stories of ladies who have been through it and were up and about quickly afterwards.

otchayaniye Sat 16-Jul-11 16:59:12

very quickly, and very best of luck but wanted to chime in that I had a elcs for my first (was great) and healed amazingly quickly. I was shocked, really shocked, as the doom mongers had prepared me for a terrible time. I lifted (nothing stupidly heavy) and walked fine after 24 hours. And this was overseas and I had no help (ok, I did have a housekeeper)

I thought the experience was good and am requesting another for 4 weeks time for this one. Again, no family help (although husband is taking time off work, but not specifically to help me lift shit)

Very best of luck.

Squiglettsmummy2bx Sat 16-Jul-11 17:19:24

I have had 2 cs, emcs & elcs & recovered quickly & well with both. 1 night stay in hospital with the emcs & 2 nights with the elcs. The best advice I was given was by a lovely midwife who made me get up & start walking about as soon as I was able & she told me to stand up straight no hunching over. Avoid stairs & lifting & rest when you can, go with how you feel. I felt pretty good all things considered & also healed very quickly with regards to my scar etc.
Hope all goes well for you x

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