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First trimester support group - worry, plan or relax

(14 Posts)
Imo1 Tue 28-Jun-11 11:14:32

Hi all

I'm 5w 4d with DC#2. I had forgotten how scary the first 12 weeks are, constantly racing to the loo to check for blood and monitoring every twinge. I thought I'd see if there are any other newly pregnant ladies out there who want to join me in getting through the first weeks up to the magic 12 week scan!

To add to the drama some idiot smashed into my car on Sunday on the motorway and DS and I had to go to hospital. A&E were very reassuring about the baby being well protected and told me that stress from the accident would be the biggest threat - how do I not stress now???!!!


mummymccar Tue 28-Jun-11 13:21:57

hi Imo1,
In the same boat, 5 + 5 (you're a day behind me!) and keep dashing off to the toilet to check for bleeding every couple of hours, consulting Dr. Google every few hours, and even went to see GP when my shoulder started hurting. I was shaking in the waiting room, convinced that it was an ectopic pregnancy! (all was OK).
The crash sounds awful, hope you and DS are ok. My GP told me that baby is in the perfect place and is very resilient so you don't need to worry too much. Those thoughts have calmed me down a lot in the last week. I think the best way to de-stress is to have a hot bath, watch a film, and try not to think about it. If anything was going to happen then it would've done by now. Have you got a pregnancy diary? It may be a good idea to write in that or start one if you haven't. Everytime I start writing about my fears it always calms me down and often I realise that I was just being anxious over nothing. So, try not to worry. Baby is in a safe place, and if anything was going to happen it would've done by now.

QueenCee Tue 28-Jun-11 14:46:41

I'm 6+1 with DC2 and a terrible knicker checker! I've also had a MC before DD so am super super paranoid.
I hate this part of pregnancy and wish I could relax but really can't.... It's all far too stressful.
Hand holding most definately required!

LoneStarGirl Tue 28-Jun-11 17:29:34

I''ve just posted a thread about early scans as I am thinking of getting one done, as I'm so anxious with my first pregnancy (6 weeks).
Its good to know everyone else is experiencing the same worries!!

hermionejgranger Tue 28-Jun-11 18:30:26

Hi guys...I'm 6+1 first timer and very scared! Also compulsive knicker checker and imagining terrible things every time i get a twinge. IKWYM, LoneStarGirl - and I read your thread (didn't post as have no advice for you!) - I'm almost too scared to have even an early scan in case...
I think though that trying to do all the right things will give some kind of "peace" - and I'm going to try to book something that I really DON'T want to do for the week my 12 week scan is due because then the time will go quicker. Won't it???

Imo1 Tue 28-Jun-11 19:01:46


Thanks for the advice mummymccar - I know you are right.

hermionejgranger and lonestargirl I had an 8 week scan with DS and it really put my mind at ease. I think 12 weeks is so long to wait. I have another one booked with this baby at 8 weeks. It cost me about £100 but for the peace of mind it was worth it. My only advice is to try and wait until about 8 weeks when you should clearly be able to see a heartbeat. You don't want to spend that money only for it to be too early to see the HB and then end up more worried than you were before. They can also give you dates at that scan.

My midwife doesn't want to see me until 10 weeks so as far as I am concerned we're on our own until then and I want some reassurance. It amazes me that you can get 1/4 of the way through the pregnancy before anyone medical even speaks to you. Thank goodness for Mumsnet!


hermionejgranger Tue 28-Jun-11 19:13:57

Thanks Imo1 - might do that. Does the MW listen for a HB at the booking-in appointment? I think that might help me a bit as well!
I'm kind of surprised at the lack of medical stuff in what is the mosk risky time - but I suppose there isn't a huge amount to see or do in the very early days. I'm reading and re-reading the 2 books that I have, and have now almost succeeded in memorising the 5-week and 6-week stages. OTT? Not much...! Encouraging DH to read his manly preg book I've bought him so he gets it when I yell at him, scream at him to eff off and then cry for 20 minutes. And then want yoghurt and chocolate.

babydust27 Tue 28-Jun-11 19:31:30

Im 3+5 and found out on sunday!!

Very excited but very nervous! My tummy feels bloated and like i have pulled a muscle

What have you told about your news? Ive told my best friend and my boyfriend so far as its very early but as its my 1st im not sure what to expect in the firsty three months

Imo1 Tue 28-Jun-11 19:43:52

hermioniejgranger from what I remember the MW can't hear the heartbeat until about 15 weeks. I might be wrong but it wasn't before the 12 week scan I know that. Certainly the instruments my MWs use are pretty rudimentary and not electronic so it wouldn't be possible to pick up a HB at the booking appointment.

Congrats babydust27 great news. My rule of thumb about telling people was only telling the people you feel you could untell if that makes sense. So the people you would turn to if you needed support.

Reallea Tue 28-Jun-11 19:55:42

Hey babydust, me too, 3+5 and found out Sunday. Had to do another test this morning because I slept so badly thinking I'd already lost it... Chemical pregnancy last month so ultra ultra scared for this one! Lots of gusset checking but feel lots more pregnant than last time so fingers crossed.

Hermione my midwife last time wasnt interested in trying to listen for a heartbeat at my first visit even though it was 8 weeks, I felt really let down. Don't know what books you have but I had Lesley regan's 'your pregnancy week by week' which I got out on constant renewal from the library, it's absolutely brilliant, explains so much more than any other book I read during pregnancy and I read every one I could get my hands on! Read the reviews on amazon and see what you think.

Nice to meet you ladies and have someone to be in the same boat with!

hermionejgranger Tue 28-Jun-11 21:36:23

Imo1 thanks for the heads up...I don't want to get my hopes up and be disappointed - the hormones will make me weep for a week and that is incredibly embarrassing and not a good look!! Might book an early scan if I really can't wait any longer...

Reallea thanks too - I've got Anne Deans' "Your Pregnancy Bible" and Kaz Cooke's "Rough Guide to Pregnancy and Birth". Both seem quite good so far - might pop to the library to see if I can find the Lesley Regan one though. I've bought "The Bloke's Guide to Pregnancy" for the DH as he had started to give me funny looks. Bless... wink

Grooveisintheharte Tue 28-Jun-11 22:07:37


I am slightly further on in pregnancy - nearly 10 weeks, can't wait til the scan to hopefully know everything is ok. Easier said than done, but try not to worry about your accident; I had a serious car accident in my last pregnancy, when I was ten weeks pregnant, and luckily my baby was fine. Like your doctor said, they are very well protected as they are so tiny at this stage.

Squiglettsmummy2bx Tue 28-Jun-11 22:21:32

7 weeks tomorrow & serial worrier, knicker checker & Omg please let it be ok person here. I have an 8 year old daughter & 5 year old son. Suffering with terrible nausea which I am taking as a good sign but still panic @ every ache, twinge etc. Congratulations to you all xxx

stuffthenonsense Thu 30-Jun-11 14:16:43

hello, 3+3, found out this morning---gone from wondering 'am i pregnant?' to worrying that i STAY pregnant in just a few minutes.

i was a terrible worrier with my last baby and stressed myself sooo much, i had a little bleed at 9 weeks and another at 12 but was assured by scan. it was very terrifying going in for those scans, but oh the joy when you see that little heartbeat!

when do i see my GP? 5 weeks? 6? i guess its too soon to make a booking appointment? (oh my, and this is my fifth, i really should know)

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