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Pregnancy

Is anyone else's DH 'strutting'?!

46 replies

PreScanName · 12/06/2011 12:50

Just found out we are expecting DC2. It is VERY early days but as both our DS and this one were conceived on the first try, DH is practically pinning medals on both his balls

He is SO proud of himself.

We have agreed to keep it a secret 'til after the 12wk scan (hence silly name-change) but after that I won't be able to stop him telling everyone about his turbo sperm

Please tell me it's not just my plonker DH who does this??

OP posts:

Report

scarlettsmummy2 · 12/06/2011 12:53

no my husband is doing this too, he has already told me that he is just going to have to have a vasectomy as he is so potent. This is also our second baby conceived first month of trying. I have told him we are just extremely lucky.

SpannerPants · 12/06/2011 12:57

My DP was exactly the same - he'd just bought a Lotus Elise and told anyone who would listen that it had made him extra virile, as somehow we managed to conceive despite me being on the pill (and taking it properly).

I also had to listen to him congratulating his balls for a couple of weeks.

Took him a few weeks to cotton on that he'd then have to sell said Elise which dampened the excitement slightly

Congratulations by the way!

ShowOfHands · 12/06/2011 12:58

No dh didn't do this. And thank feck for that.

It's fine to be excited and pleased but please for the love of Moses, do NOT let him go round bragging about 'turbo sperm'. The heartbroken men and women out there dealing with infertility, miscarriage, stillbirth and a thousand other things that make the road to parenthood difficult, do not want to hear it. It's insensitive in the extreme.

howzaboutthat · 12/06/2011 13:00

If my DH did that I'd think he was a sad, insensitive neanderthal.

PreScanName · 12/06/2011 13:02

Good and serious point, Show. I've laughed it off but I have had a Conversation with him about shutting his big gob especially when around some of our friends - we have several who are in the midst of IVF etc.

The problem is you never know people's situations.

I'll tell him he has to restrict his bragging to grandparents and the bathroom mirror

OP posts:

scarlettsmummy2 · 12/06/2011 13:06

To stick up for my husband he certainly would not behave like this in front of anyone apart from me. He really isn't a neanderthal and was recently very upset when a colleague had a miscarriage- I was actually surprised he was as upset as he was. I took this to be a light hearted thread and in no way wished to offend anyone experiencing difficulties having a child.

PreScanName · 12/06/2011 13:09

Me too, scarlett. My DH is not a neanderthal either

OP posts:

PreScanName · 12/06/2011 13:10

Thanks for the congrats, Spanner!

OP posts:

VoluptuaGoodshag · 12/06/2011 13:10

Yes. I got pregnant fairly quickly after DD1. My DH's comment was 'shoot, reload'. Nothing to do with the fact that I might actually be fertile, it's all down to him and his supersperm. It still rankles with me.

waitingtobeamummy · 12/06/2011 13:15

Hi Prescanname and Scarlettsmummy2 - as a person in one of the situations that showofhands described I feel sad and jealous of your post. But then I feel sad and jealous lots of times! I understand that it is a light hearted thread that is in the conception segment so don't worry , but I think showofhands is right and that it is a discussion that should be talked about in only the right situations.
And congratulations to the both of you!

waitingtobeamummy · 12/06/2011 13:16

Think I went a bit ott with the bold !

ShowOfHands · 12/06/2011 13:18

My comments were in reference only to the op not being able to stop him talking to people about his turbo sperm. A step too far.

DH wouldn't do this anyway as he's just not that sort of person. He'd feel lucky/happy/tearful/pleased etc but wouldn't strut or brag or anything else. It's just not his style.

Nowt wrong with being ridiculously pleased to have conceived. It's a bloody brilliant thing. It's just good to be mindful of how you express this when in mixed company.

If you now tell me that he banged you on the head with a club before the conception, I might change my opinion but otherwise, please believe I limit my response solely to your fear that at 12 weeks he might be released into public with his chest puffed out and his brain unengaged.

Congratulations op. It's fabulous news.

PreScanName · 12/06/2011 13:23

Hi waiting, what a nice post. I'm sorry you're in your situation and hope things happen for you very soon. There's a fine line to be walked between being happy to be pregnant and being allowed to talk/get excited about it, and being sensitive in the presence of those who might not be so lucky.

After all, there but for the grace of God etc

OP posts:

VoluptuaGoodshag · 12/06/2011 13:24

In addition, when I was still in hospital after giving birth, he and his brother were more interested in when they could go out and wet the baby's head, turned out to be the following weekend after I got out. That still rankles with me too. I probably need counselling :)

howzaboutthat · 12/06/2011 13:25

Being happy about a new baby has nothing to do with wanting to "tell the world" about your "turbo sperm".

It's a totally different thing. In fact I'd go so far as to say it almost takes something away from the joy of the pregnancy - that boasting about how fast your swimmers go is the main event.

howzaboutthat · 12/06/2011 13:26

No fertilitly issues here by the way, just utterly baffled about what on EARTH he is actually boasting ABOUT.

scarlettsmummy2 · 12/06/2011 13:26

waiting- everyday I count my blessings. I am sure you will get there in the end too. x

eurochick · 12/06/2011 13:29

Congrats!

I would try to calm him down about the turbosperm thing tho.... We are TTC and have been for a while. My initial tests came back fine. We are now waiting for his SA. In the meantime, loads of friends have managed to get pg first month of trying. Even without anyone bragging about "turbosperm" we are both a bit sensitive about it all.

PreScanName · 12/06/2011 13:29

Thanks Show. I've done DH a disservice in my attempt at a 'funny' thread. He's not really a twat, honest.

howzaboutthat - he's over the moon, excited, and just being silly. He doesn't REALLY believe it's about his turbo-sperm.

OP posts:

Spuddybean · 12/06/2011 13:41

Hi OP. I found your post funny and charming and could tell it was an endearing josh at your justifiably proud DH (congrats by the way).
I understand the pain that people describe, tho not 1st hand - my sister had 12 years of ivf. and i'm sure your DH wouldn't be insensitive.
My DP only started trying last month and only managed it once as he works away and i know if i am already preggers he will be insufferable!

Best wishes

MsChanandlerBong · 12/06/2011 17:44

Hi PreScanName - and congratulations!!
Your OP really made me smile! I can imagine how annoying it could be ("hey, I might have had something to do with it too!!") but it is lovely that he is so pleased. There have been a few discussions on here recently where the DP wasn't particularly happy with becoming a father, so really good to hear about a perhaps over enthusiastic DH!!!

Re the sensitivity issue... that is a tricky one. Whenever someone has good news of any kind, there is the risk of telling someone who is currently not having a good time (personally thinking about the time a friend told me in great detail about their proposal, just after I had been dumped by my DP of 10 years...) but I don't think that means people should have to hide their happiness in general (obviously general moral guidelines about sensitivity should always apply).

Life is full of ups and downs for everyone. And I think genuine happiness is always lovely to see. Gloating however, is not acceptable. It sounds to me that your DH is just happy and proud at your joint good fortune.

Fluter · 12/06/2011 18:09

grins
Yup, DH did it as well, bless him. And this was after being told that his swimmers weren't up to scratch, and the IVF we'd need to have would have to be ICSI.... on the day - well, they were apparently so ok, they cancelled the ICSI bit.
I'd let them have their um... 'head' on this one, myself!

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MsChanandlerBong · 12/06/2011 18:10

Anyway, in response to the OP my DH hasn't been strutting, he has been walking around with a bewildered look on his face as if to say "what have I done?!"

LynetteScavo · 12/06/2011 18:31

DH was like this when I was pg with DS1 (unplanned) .Funnily enough a good school freind of his was also expecting a baby (unplanned) at the same time. They would get to gether in the pub and do funny arm gestures and say "whosamaan" A third school freind who was desperately, and unsuccesfully, trying to concieve with his wife was refered to as a "jaffa", followed by childish sniggers. This was from intelligent, well brought up men in their late 20's

LynetteScavo · 12/06/2011 18:32

In thier defense, I think they were actually shit scared.

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