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Pregnancy

Shy husband- zero sex!

4 replies

Becks99 · 31/05/2011 22:23

First pregnancy, 6 months in and my husband seems to have completely gone off sex in the last 14 weeks. Granted I did suffer from bad morning sickness and initially wasn't really on form, but he seems terrified of hurting the baby. Well that's what he tells me!

I am a unusual, or have others partners felt like this?

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clairefromsteps · 31/05/2011 22:56

No, you're not the only one! DH isn't keen on sex since my pregnancy has progressed - he is weirded out by the fact that his erect penis will be that close to the baby. Understandable, I guess, and from what I've heard a lot of men feel like this. I've tried explaining about the function of a cervix, but he's still not keen. I'm not going to pressure him because if the boot was on the other foot and for whatever reason I didn't want sex I'd go beserk if he pressured me.

Is there still lots of intimacy, cuddles, kisses etc? There's still, you know, other 'stuff' you can do that doesn't involve penetrative sex and will make sure that neither of you are crawling the walls for the next three months.

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AxyMum · 01/06/2011 09:28

My DH wasn't keen on sex in the early days but although he said he was worried about hurting the baby I think a lot of it was that he was more worried about me than he realised as I was quite poorly for the first 16 weeks. During that time I didn't want sex at all but around 20 weeks I was rampant and after a while he got used to the idea and just went gently.

Until this week he'd been quite happy to have a lot more sex as my hormones and libido had kicked in again, but now my waters have gone we're obviously abstaining.

Have faith - he'll get to a point where he'll want it enough to ignore the pregnancy aspect ;) But in the meantime lots of kissing and cuddling, massages, stroking, perhaps oral or even anal (if you're not squeamish about that stuff), and touching. Just stay intimate.

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lollystix · 01/06/2011 10:02

I am on 4th pregnancy and dh like this each time. The bump freaks him out and it gets worse as I get bigger. He generally obliges around 40 weeks to try and help things start. He's back to normal after the baby's out (must be as this is no.4 in 5 years) but he is still moaning about not having exclusive rights over my boobs.

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candr · 01/06/2011 19:11

My DH says that although he still finds me sexy and attractive and loves me being pregnant it doesn't do anything for him sex wise. We had a chat about it which I was pleased about as I was really sick to start with and then sooo tired that I was worried he would be getting fustrated with lack of sex so was pleased to find his libido seems to have gone on holiday. Neither of us knew how we would feel once pregnant I think I am lucky that it is not stressing either of us out - loving the massages and 'tummy time' he is doing though.

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