After many horrible MW appointments, and hassle getting seen at all, I have had an appointment with the specialist (as requested by my therapist, as DTD1 was stillborn).
Previous midwife appts. have been awful, especially with one insisting that PTSD is the same as PND and refusing to write PTSD on my notes, then trying hard to convince me to demand a homebirth. (I wouldn't want one even without the stillbirth and therefore high risk).
This MW explained everything thoroughly, and will make sure that I choose who to be seen by and when. I feel so relieved.