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anyone out there got 2 babies with a 13 month gap? please help me feel confident!

(14 Posts)
bluecheesefiend Wed 05-Jan-11 12:49:46

hello,

DD is 5 months old & I've just found out I'm 5 weeks pregnant! I'm very happy about it but could do with a little boost re: how I'm going to cope with a big bump / newborn and a 1 yr old...! Any uplifting stories & anecdotes would be most welcome.

x

flares Wed 05-Jan-11 12:58:46

Yes. I do. 14 months between to be exact. Ds2 was 5 mnths when I fell pg with dd. They are now 3 and coming up 2.

In all honesty it's fine. The double buggy is (or rather was....I did away with it asap) an utter pain in the vadge...as is trying to leave the house in less than an hour.

We have a 9yr old ds as well...so we have three.

Erm....the two little ones adore one another and keep each other company really well. It is deffo twice the cuteness!

When I was very pg with my youngest it was hard going as ds2 wasn't walking yet, and I had the school run to do twice a day....at that point the school was two miles away and I can't drive. That was hard going yeah....but, as with all things that time came to pass. You just get on with it don't you?

Having two under two has made me more organised and active and sharper of mind, if anything. No regrets.

bluecheesefiend Wed 05-Jan-11 13:00:50

perfect response! thank you!!

really good to know about the double buggy too as was thinking about that just today - any other top tips? :-)

FiveFeetTwo Wed 05-Jan-11 13:00:52

I have a 12 month age gap. I won't lie to you - it was very hard at first (zero family support and dh was ill at the time). It got easier and easier and it is a complete breeze now (5 and 4). They play together, have similar interests and friends and are a complete delight.

I wouldn't have it any other way.

Congratulations!

pickyourbattles Wed 05-Jan-11 13:10:08

Slightly larger 16mth gap here, but similar story. V hard being pg when DS1 wasn't walking (he was up and about at 13mths when I was already over 6mths). They are now 2.7 and 14mths and play so brilliantly together - esp since DS2 started to walk. They just love each other's company and are great fun.

Most of my friends are just starting out with DC2 and are all the way back to sleepless nights/feeding/weaning/etc etc whereas all that is now behind us [bittersweet emoticon].

The first year is bloody hard though so my best bit of advice? Do NOT be proud! Accept any help going and grab any sleep at any time that you can!

Good luck smile.

bluecheesefiend Wed 05-Jan-11 20:18:47

thanks chaps x

dirnty Wed 05-Jan-11 20:21:35

I've got 14 months between my boys. Was ok when pg but after csection with ds2 found it hard to get ds1 out of cot etc.

Now they are 4 and 5 and best of friends, best thing I ever could have done (inadvertently!) was to have them this close together

stellamac Wed 05-Jan-11 22:04:54

Slightly different emphasis but there is 13 months between my sister and I and it was great in terms of having a chum to grow up with.

Safiyyah Wed 05-Jan-11 23:52:50

Hi, I am a lurker, never really post, but had to after seeing your post! I have a 12 month old baby (she turned 1 a week ago) and I'm due my next baby (3rd) on the 19th of this month. When I found out I was pregnant, I was devastated and terrified. But now, I'm happy and believe that it's the best thing to happen. It's going to be hard work, but it'll be worth it as I'm not planning to have anymore (DS1 is 4, DD2 is 12 months). My aim is to go with the flow and not try to be a perfect at everything I do. I truly believe that an anxious mother makes an anxious baby.

I'm currently 38 weeks and it can be a real struggle with an active 12 month old, but it really isn't too bad. I cope because I have to and that spurs me on. I also get a lot of support from my DH when he's not at work. School runs are hard, but again, you just cope....I hope this helps in some ways.

cloudydays Thu 06-Jan-11 01:52:17

Like stellamac, I'm one of two with 13 months between. My brother and I were best buddies growing up and still are (in our mid-30s with kids of our own).

We did bicker and compete and all of that, but it was so great having him the year above me all through school and being part of the same group of friends as we got older. As adults, we have so much shared history - having not just grown up in the same house with the same parents, but basically at the same time.

In case any of your worry is about cutting short DD's "baby of the family" time, it might be helpful to hear that you are, in all likelihood, about to give her the greatest gift of her childhood.

babeinthewood Thu 06-Jan-11 02:01:58

I know someone who has 10 months (!) between her two and it hasnt been easy, but she wouldnt change a single thing.

My sister and I have 12 months between us, and for the record, we rarely speak these days as we are totally different people, I got a very cute niece out of it mind. But as children, we always had someone who wanted to play the same type of games as us and as teens we were usually going through simmilar things at the same time, so growing up it was great smile

gardener1 Thu 06-Jan-11 16:28:48

Hi,

I have just found out that I'm pregnant for the second time and my little one is 8 months old.

I'm experiencing a mixed bag of emotions - I'm elated as my first child was conceived through fertility treatment and we didn't think we could have a family naturally. We lived in hope that we could conceive without any medical help (Drs never found anything to suggest that we couldn't but after years of trying we had not been successful) therefore we started trying again a couple of months ago as we never really knew how long it might take us to catch.

I'm also a bit scared how I'm going to cope the further along the road I get.

Also, close relations have had multiple miscarriages in the last two years and since we conceived first time around things have been strained and now I'm concerned that our news will hit them really hard.

We started trying again fully aware of the possibility of us conceiving but think that our track record didn't really allow us to believe that conceiving so soon would be a reality.

As I say, mine and my husband's over riding reaction is of complete joy but I'd really like some reassurance/ advice from anyone who has been in a similar position.

Thanks

tebbles Thu 06-Jan-11 18:28:35

How did you physically find the pregnancy/birth (having had them so close)?

Also did it affect breastfeeding?

I would prefer to have my second as close as I can to the first, but am just concerned about how I would go physically. I know it would be difficult lifting/carrying the older baby while pregnant but were there any other difficulties?

bluecheesefiend Tue 11-Jan-11 20:10:43

Hello Ladies,

I haven't logged on for a couple of days and didn't realise more people had responded - what lovely uplifting stories.

I had a ELCS for DD1 and if the next one is also a CS, I'm a bit nervous about the recovery, as dirnty mentioned. We barely have any family suppport around so it'll be me and DH... but my recovery with DH1 was astonishingly fast so I'm keeping my fingers crossed - there's really not a lot else I can do at this stage anyway.

cloudydays - its probably the new preggo hormones but I had a bit of a moment reading your note - thank you!

gardener1 - I know two people who went through years of IVF for the first and then fell pregnant with the second naturally. They both referred to the second as their "buy one get one free!" baby!
Re your family, misscarriage can't be anything but devastating, but they'll be happy that you're happy and they'll dote on the beautiful new relation that you're providing - who could hold anything against a baby??
Ok, yes, there are a few oddballs out there, but do try to stay positive. The chances are they'd be sad to hear you're worrying so.

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