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In your experience, which was harder, the first 20 weeks or the last 20 weeks of pregnancy?

(39 Posts)
BellaBearisWideAwake Wed 15-Dec-10 14:33:20

I have a bit of time on my hands and I was thinking - I found up to 20 weeks I was very anxious of the risk of miscarriage, I had nausea, I couldn't tell people as much as I wanted to, I was exhausted, I had dreadful constipation.
Now I am 24 weeks and can feel the baby moving regularly and I'm not so anxious, I am recalling the aches and pains of later pregnancy, the inability to sit up easily or bend down, and I can't sleep for needing to wee!

On reflection for me, it's the first half because of the uncertainty (4th pg, 2nd baby)

BellaBearisWideAwake Wed 15-Dec-10 14:51:37

well, I thought it was interesting! never mind.

Deliaskis Wed 15-Dec-10 15:37:15

I'm only 31 weeks with my first so I don't know what the next 9 weeks have in store for me, but I do think the earlier part is hard for a number of reasons:

- Symptoms that are invisible to anyone but you, but just as bad if not worse than later ones (.e.g my tiredness in the first 12 weeks was like a sledgehammer)
- Having to keep it a secret some of the time
- Worry about miscarrying etc. early on and until you start feeling lots of movement
- Until there's movement, very little 'interaction' or bonding with baby (i.e. you just see at scans etc. and hope for the best the rest of the time)
- Getting used to the idea of being pg and the dilemmas that involves (money, work, making room etc.)

So far, my last 10 or so weeks have been better because:

- More visibly pg and everybody expects me to be taking it a bit more easy
- Reassurance from regular movements
- Fun of regular movement - baby makes me giggle when s/he's having a good jump around
- Am tired but mainly physically, am better able to cope generally now than I was 2-3 months ago
- More visibly pg means lots of nice 'looks' from people and extra consideration which makes me feel spesh
- Looking
- DH's face when he comes in and sees me and my bump

So in the main, I would agree with you, I found the first half hard, and so far, the second half easier, but I may change my mind in a week or so!


KN1979 Wed 15-Dec-10 15:39:51

Last 20 weeks! The first 20 weeks I felt pretty good, I enjoyed having a secret and I didn't suffer too much. The last 20 weeks were a nightmare.... I'm small (5ft1) and had a big baby (9lb) so even after he dropped down 8 weeks before he was born I still had shocking pain in my ribs all the time. I could hardly waddle from the sofa to the kettle, and then the little blighter was 2 weeks late!

All good now though... three months later, I'm even considering another one.

southeastastra Wed 15-Dec-10 15:42:39

both as bad as each other ime, never experienced tiredness like it since!

BellaBearisWideAwake Wed 15-Dec-10 15:44:15

ha! 3 posts = 3 opinions!

MrsJohnDeere Wed 15-Dec-10 15:48:03

Last 20 weeks for me. Pre-eclampsia, pelvic wotsit syndrome, inability to sleep, and generally felt wretched. I don't bloom at all in pregnancy.

BornToFolk Wed 15-Dec-10 15:49:20

Without question, last 20 weeks. But I've only been pregnant once and it was a relatively straightforward pregnancy so I didn't worry too much about miscarrying. I was also lucky not to suffer from morning sickness. I really had no symptoms at all until the bump started to show and I could feel movement. I quite liked keeping it a secret!

However, I had bad heartburn from about 25 weeks right up until the end as DS never engaged. I was induced at 42 weeks and those last two weeks were the worst by far as I was huge, uncomfortable and starting to get worried about being overdue and what was going to happen etc. I hated the effort that was required to do anything, whether it was putting on my shoes, or walking up the stairs.

KN1979 Wed 15-Dec-10 15:49:25

Bella, that is funny!! Although it does mean that the next person along is due to say that the whole thing was a breeze envy

yama Wed 15-Dec-10 15:58:03

Both times the last 20 weeks were by far worse than the first 20.

bibbitybobbitysantahat Wed 15-Dec-10 16:00:56

First 20, definitely, because of morning sickness.

I didn't start to get really uncomfortable and tired until about 38 or 39 weeks but even that was better than feeling nauseous all the bloody time.

sh77 Wed 15-Dec-10 16:14:11

I second everything delia said. V anxious in the first 20 weeks and felt physically awful in 1st tri. I am 26 weeks now and feel energetic, loving the movements, excuse to get out everything.

lucielooo Wed 15-Dec-10 16:25:12

I'm 24 weeks and agree with sh77.. does that mean we're in for a shock over the next few weeks!

Bobby99 Wed 15-Dec-10 16:32:24

I'd say the second trimester was the best, firt and last weren't so good.

MrsCratchit Wed 15-Dec-10 16:34:28

Am 30 weeks and for me the last week has been by far the hardest. Doesn't bode well for the final 10...

HouseOfBambooootiful Wed 15-Dec-10 16:34:37

Yes agree, the first few weeks and the last few weeks were the worst.

BaronessBomburst Wed 15-Dec-10 16:48:32

Yet another opinion - it was all hell apart from the last 7 or 8 weeks which were bearable. DS was fully engaged at this stage (oooh, said everyone, you'll be having him soon - WRONG!), and the fact that he sat so low meant that I could eat, move, and even painted my own toenails.

BreastmilkDoesAFabLatte Wed 15-Dec-10 16:49:24

First time around, the first 20 weeks were definately worse. Undoubtedly. Entirely.

I'm now just past 15weeks with DC2 and hoping the same will be true this time...

Francagoestohollywood Wed 15-Dec-10 16:51:43

My anxiety levels were at their highest when I was between about 22 to 32 weeks.

Physically the worst weeks have been the first 12/15 both times.

Basically, I really enjoyed only the last weeks of pg grin

Deliaskis Wed 15-Dec-10 17:04:52

You see, I think this question depends on whether or not you 'bloom' and when this starts/finishes. I didn't (or at least haven't so far), and was still being sick up to about 24 weeks, so felt cheated to have reached halfway and still have to spend mornings with my head down the loo. Everybody had said the middle trimester would be fine, and it just wasn't, it was just more of the same.

And now I'm really looking forward to getting to know my baby, whereas early on it was all a bit abstract.

I think I just feel like now, the pressure is off, in that nobody expects me to be perfect - busy at work, volunteer job, singing in choir, domestic goddess, etc. I was really intent on not seeming 'weak' early on and taking it all in my stride, even though I felt dreadful. Now I'm learning to say no, and people don't think it odd or anti-social or needy if I would rather put my feet up on the sofa than go out somewhere or whatever. I feel relieved that I have a reprise from some of the things I do, and am being allowed to just do what I feel up to doing, rather than giving the appearance of being able to do everything.

I appreciate this is pressure I put myself under though, so others may be different.


stainesmassif Wed 15-Dec-10 17:07:28

definitely split pregnancy into three trimesters and only enjoy the second one. currently 40 + 9 and utterly miserable!

FillMyXmasSprocking Wed 15-Dec-10 17:08:43

The first 20 weeks, no contest!

The last half was so easy for me. I felt better in the last month that i did the whole rest of my pregnancy.

The first half was a worry and i was so bloddy knackered!

mammyshere Wed 15-Dec-10 17:14:24

The last ten are the hardest imo. Fed up, exhausted, uncomfortable , impatient, terrified of labour. Before 32 weeks and after 20 are the most enjoyable.

zinnia Thu 16-Dec-10 15:42:15

I'm 20 weeks tomorrow, and so far it's been a real struggle so am hoping things are set to improve for the second half (or at least for the next 10 weeks or so)

This is pg2, last time was pretty easy all round compared with this, but the 2nd trimester in particular was a joy.

God I didn't know how lucky I was!

systemsaddict Thu 16-Dec-10 15:51:15

First 20 weeks: anxiety, nausea, pregnancy insomnia, exhaustion.
Next 20 weeks: SPD, swelling, heartburn, bump insomnia, immobility, slowness, exhaustion.

There were about 3 weeks of 'glowing' in the middle though, that bit was nice!

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