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Pregnancy

2nd (+) time round - nobody gives a monkeys?

7 replies

redpickle · 01/12/2010 14:00

I'm 28wks (and BIG) with no 2. DD is 2.9 and I've really noticed the difference in other people this time. Whereas in my first pg I was (occasionally) offered a seat, allowed to put my feet up and generally 'looked after' this time I can be struggling with a pushchair and toddler and no-one bats an eyelid. The other day really struggling to lift daughter into a trolley in Sains and not only got no help BUT got asked to move!!

My in-laws have expressed no interest and keep 'forgetting' I'm pregnant. My SIL is pg with first and when discussing who might pick them up from airport said "Well we cant ask SIL because she's pregnant, any chance you're around?". This was a flight landing at 7pm when I have my DD to bath get to bed AND I'm pregnant too!! Grrr!

It aint a football up my jumper!

It's as if people assume its somehow easier when you have bump and toddler than just bump. Actually I'm knackered, thanks for asking!

Anyone else found this? it's most odd.

OP posts:
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Preggersplayspop · 01/12/2010 14:04

I think people do spread the joy a bit more for the first one. When I left work the first time I was showered with gifts, cards, flowers a presentation etc. Second time around, nada. I still hold a grudge about that actually!

I didn't really notice it with strangers though, I would still be offered a seat generally if I was heavily pg. Mind you, some people tend to steer clear if you have a toddler with you anyway so this may have an effect.

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juliec26 · 01/12/2010 14:23

Perfect am going to vent... I am currently snowed in with my dd who is 4 and bored.. I'm 34 weeks and all dd wants to do is make a snowman and be pulled in her sleigh obviously I'm in not state to do either...My mum and sisters live 10 min walk away has anyone even bothered to ring me...no!!! Actually upset by that and the fact that 2nd time round no one cares about u.. Thank god for a neighbour who got me food today so I could eat!!...dp has been forced to go to work they sent a cab for him and is working till midnight!! Grrrrllll rant over before I burst into tears.

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anonMum2 · 01/12/2010 15:09

It's strange, isn't it?! My family and friends are all acting like nothing is going on with us too (second pg). I think the worse thing for me is my DH forgets that I'm pregnant most the time.

I don't get offered any help when out and about with my toddler too, another strange one.. as though "this pregnant woman must be fine because she's already got one child".

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Violet5 · 01/12/2010 17:14

I'm having my 6th and can identify totally, i'm due in 14 days and nervous about the labour and all i get is snorted laughter that 'you've done it before you'll be fine' Angry ...rant over Smile

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gysela · 01/12/2010 23:16

Oh I cried about this today! This is my third and DH doesn't give a shit. My DDs are more interested in the baby than he is! Makes me really emotional.....

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pinkyp · 02/12/2010 00:41

I agree, people dont seem as bothered. Dh does look after me more but doesnt treat me like i might break like he did 1st time. I'm currently 1 week overdue with ds1 who's 3.4,were snowed in too but i found myself making a snowman on tuesday Blush

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chloeb2002 · 02/12/2010 01:10

This is so funny as i thought it was just me.. Im currenty 30 weeks with dc #3 with an 8 year old and a 2 1/2 year old at home... yet at work another girl is pg with her first and is treated like royalty... we are ICU nurses so work can be very stressfull and demanding at time but hey.. the other irl cannot have her morning tea late.. or lunch.. cannot be part of the medical emeregncy team.. cannot take infectious patients... cannot do bugger all... yet muggins nope... ive had to battle gestational labile blood pressure.. had to argue with the boss about the apporpriatey of sending me into a swine flu patient and so the story ges on!!!! rant completed

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