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I'm really crap at being pregnant and I don't care who knows it: Thread II!

(68 Posts)
Rocklover Tue 23-Nov-10 12:29:58

Having just posted on the wmmc thread from Jan I thought it would be carthartic for all those who detest being preggers to post on here.

Please feel free to whinge, moan, wail, shout, cry or whatever. Get it all off your chest, I'll start with my little rant:

I too am crap at pregnancy. I feel sick almost constantly, I have high levels of anxiety about everything you could imagine. I have very low iron and have icky side effects from the iron tablets which makes me feel worse.

I am getting fat (this meaning that the flab ON TOP of my bump is growing) because I eat crap and I just cannot make myself eat healthy stuff. My hair is frizzy and I can no longer be arsed to blow dry it, so it looks hideous. I have awful heartburn, dry and flakey nipples, I am pissed of all the time and I have ZERO patience with anyone.

My poor DP has felt so rejected by me that he burst into tears the other day because he felt that he disgusted me (I have since tried hard to adjust my appalling mood swing related behaviour).

This is my 2nd DC and I will never be pregnant again, in fact my mum has told me she will kill me if I ever dare consider another child. grin

GretnaGirl Tue 23-Nov-10 13:06:46

LOL I just posted on my facebook status that I'm rubbish at being pregnant! My Mam asked if I could get my tubes tied when I have a section for this baby and I think it might be a very good idea, as well as sending hubby for the snip and using every other form of contraceptive available!
My body just does not like growing babies, they suck the life out of me! I feel a complete failure amongst other Mum's who seem to have sailed through pregnancy with another 3 toddlers hanging off their skirts. I feel sick, tired, dizzy and my hips are killing me. Rant over.

BreastmilkDoesAFabLatte Tue 23-Nov-10 13:27:51

Can I join in? But please, don't tell anyone from work that I'm pregnant.

I'm feeling just utterly dreadful. I have all sorts of additional medical problems which meant that I was unable to do anything much other than sleep throughout my last pregnancy (though I completed a degree whilst recumbent) and it's looking as though this pregnancy is heading the same way. I have seemingly intractable issssssshooooos with anyone male coming near me anywhere downstairs and yet am so off-to-top-of-the-risk-scale that it may again be impossible to avoid well-intentioned Y-chromasomed obstetricians poking about. I'm really struggling against the medicalisation of what feels to me should be a normal life event, and yet at the same time feel so, so ill.

And I can't even feel sorry for myself because the conception was entirely concensual and much desired, despite DD being well short of a year old.

How am I going to get through another 28 weeks of it? My lovely midwife commented that I'm likely to deliver at 38-39 rather than 40+ weeks, and she has no idea what a wonderfully uplifting thing that was to hear...

GretnaGirl Tue 23-Nov-10 13:43:16

Don't feel bad, I chose to get pregnant too and feel horrendous and useless! We can make up for it by being fab Mm's when LO's arrive!

GretnaGirl Tue 23-Nov-10 13:43:43

Mum's that should have said!

Rocklover Tue 23-Nov-10 13:45:40

Aww Breastmilk, sounds like you have very good reasons to moan. I hope things go as well as they can for you.

mrsbabookaloo Tue 23-Nov-10 13:47:28

I'm not pregnant THANK GOD! but just want to add my support. Pregnancy is terrible: I'd rather go thru birth again than be pregnant again, but I won't be doing either now I've got 2 lovely dds. This is the time of year that I was pregnant and feeling at my worst with both of mine and I have flashbacks to how dreadful - physically and mentally - I felt.
Just get thru it, one day at a time!

BreastmilkDoesAFabLatte Tue 23-Nov-10 16:42:40

Thanks for all your support.

I'm sorry of course that others are crap at being pregnant too and honestly I wouldn't wish how I felt on anyone... but I'm glad I'm not alone.

One day at a time, yes. Deeep breath...

17inmyhead Tue 23-Nov-10 17:25:55

Really? There are other people struggling with this too? I'd say thank god, but I don't mean I'm happy that anyone feels as utterly sh*t as I do. I loved being pregnant first time round, but this time I feel permanently sick (I'm 33 weeks now) and exhausted and generally ill. I just started another thread hoping for some reassurance about feeling better when the baby comes out. I can't actually remember feeling well - it's been 8 months of feeling miserable. So other mums, please remind me that we only(!) have to deal with sleep deprivation when the baby comes, and I'll get back my usual cheery, healthy self from Jan next year!

PaigeTurner Tue 23-Nov-10 17:46:23

This pregnancy (unplanned) has basically ruined my life. I'm single, lost my business due to being sick and housebound for 20 weeks, have such a phobia about being sick my obs is talking to me about c section, was nearly admitted to the psych ward last week due to increasing depression, my friends have all fucked off, no family nearby, found out I'm not entitled to any help with housing costs while I'm "on maternity" so will have to go back to work 2 weeks after baby is born or lose my house to the bank.

I hope it's all worth it.

ng1412 Tue 23-Nov-10 17:50:23

I'd like to join this thread, I went back to work yesterday having been off sick for the first 4 months of my pregnancy, as I had hideous migraines and sickness. Today I woke up after one day back with a migraine and feeling sick again. I am shattered and I only did one day's work, I am pathetic!!

Roll on mat.leave in March, that's all I say.

lia66 Tue 23-Nov-10 18:54:04

I hate hate hate being pregnant and this is our 6th so you think i'd be ok by now? Nope

I don't bloom, feel sick and ill for 6 mths, then after that breathless and huge.

Really really don't like the feeling of it moving about inside, just feels a wierd and alien

Heartburn, blocked nose, constipation and thats without the bad moods and heightened sense of smell that even poor dh can't come near me cos his smell is all wrong.

AHHH thats a bit better.

pipoca Tue 23-Nov-10 19:54:55

I hate being pregnant, especially the first few months. I'm 14 weeks now and still feel permanently exhausted, need to sleep all the time and queasy all day. Some days are better than others, I was sick 4 times yesterday including losing my dinner last night.
I felt OK once this stage stopped last time but that wasn't til about 16 wks. Can't remember how many times I've wished I'd never got pregnant and how guilty I feel about that since I've now come back high risk for Downs and have to have an amnio...another thing to fret about.
But mostly it's the nausea I can't take.

pipoca Tue 23-Nov-10 19:55:44

And I am never ever ever having another baby ever even if that means no sex ever again in my life.

luckykitty Tue 23-Nov-10 20:26:23

I spent today hobbling round 2 different hospitals with suspected pre-eclampsia as my blood pressure indicated that I might actually explode, I have killer SPD and have to use crutches all the time wth velcro belt thing round pelvis, double that with enormous elastic corset thing for my back, the carpal tunnel in my hands which means that actually using the crutches hurts like fook, havent slept for 4 nights as I cant get comfy due to the fact that im sure my back is about to break and im in constant agony, I cant eat anything except cocopops as I get awful awful heartburn - like im dying-, only to be told by diabetic nurse - as they thought i might have that too this morning when every thing under the sun was present in my wee- told me that cocopops are not really appropriate at 34 weeks....hmm

The point I was going to make was that I cant beleive Ive made it this far, I had no idea I would be in constant pain for months and so sleep deprived that im going nuts, and look like a ghost, resulting to washing my hair over the sink as I cant actually get in the bath etc etc BUT we had a scan today to measure her and it was the most awesome thing ever. She has a small face and tiny hands, and no matter how utterly shit I feel its all totally worth it grin

Hang in there x x

lexxity Tue 23-Nov-10 21:01:47

Joining in. 40 weeks today and want it over NOW! Have had bloody horrendous SPD and not slept properly since I don't know when, I jst want my baby now. Am so grumpy and sick of people checking if i've gone into labour, obviously not! The only thing keeping me sane is the black humour of the mums on the school run, bless them.

Never doing this again, 2 will be enough.

perpetuallypregnant Tue 23-Nov-10 21:36:14

Lia.. this is my 5th and I feel the same.
I hate it so much.
I'm almost 17 weeks now. This pregnancy was totally unplanned as my baby is only 6 months old. I feel sick, have diarrhoea or constipation constantly. I am exhausted and my anxiety levels are through the roof.

I adore being a Mum and having the babies but absolutely detest being pregnant.

I keep telling myself it will be worth it.

Oh and I get SPD too.

lia66 Tue 23-Nov-10 22:24:11

oh yes, god I forgot about the spd I have to look forward to in the next few weeks, then of course there's the insecant itching of Oc for the last 8 wks and my tummy being painfully stretched due to polyhydranios, (excess fluid)

ANd I am NEVER doing this again.

On the serious side, It really does make you feel completely miserable and I will be glad when it's over

Eyes on the prize as they say, pg is merely a means to an end, I adore my children but I just do not DO pregnancy

I feel for all of us.

bumperella Wed 24-Nov-10 13:33:04

Does anyone else get morbid convictions? You know, being absolutely SURE that they/the baby is seriously ill?
I keep thinking I am developing a certain horrific, fatal illness (pulmonary hypertension: it's obscure but vaguely hereditary, my mother had it, as did a cousin (both died) and the pregnancy breathlessness makes me convinced that I am developing it. I KNOW I'm not but I can't believe that I'm not.
Obviously have been convinced that had missed miscarraige (before 12 wk scan) baby has terrible anomaly (before 20 week scan).... etc etc.
I'm really not a hypochindriac or a worrier normally. But I feel like am becoming a total fruit-loop now.

BreastmilkDoesAFabLatte Wed 24-Nov-10 14:30:29

Oh dear. So many sad, sad stories...

PaigeTurner Sorry you're in such a nightmare position... have you looked into trying to negotiate a break on your mortgage payments? The CAB may be able to help you, as might one the mental health chirties such as Mind.

bumperella Mobid convictions? Yes, totally. The heart problems I already have (fortunately not pulmonary hypertension) make it impossible to distinguish between normal pregnancy symptoms and the potentially dangerous. Today I nearly collapsed in Boots whilst out alone with DD.

Bute yes, it will all be worth it. It will...

mynameis Wed 24-Nov-10 14:37:07

Ah a thread to warm my heart. So good to hear that its not just me hating a very much wanted pregnancy.

How anyone says that it brings you and your partner closer together is talking utter crap.

I think he is slowly learing to dislike this cranky, sickly person I have become. Ah only another 29 weeks to go sad

bumperella Wed 24-Nov-10 17:34:53

It's such a relief to know that other people have the loony hypochondria/dwelling on every negative possible/pesimism: not that I would wish it on anyone!

BreastmilkDoesAFabLatte Thu 25-Nov-10 11:22:28

How's everyone this morning?

My achievement so far today has been to wash my hair. Feeling really down...

GretnaGirl Thu 25-Nov-10 11:39:14

Not bad today, got few house jobs done but had harrowing ten minutes convincing DS to go with childminder. Tears tantrums and finally bribery with chocolate. Thing is, he'll refuse to come home later when I collect him and tell me he's having too much fun!
I'm watchin TV and trying not to think abut work, should I go back, should I not? I'm signed off but nearly out of sick pay.
How are you managing with DD Breastmilk? I'm taking the plunge and am in charge of DS all day tomorrow, I just hope he has a nap!

BreastmilkDoesAFabLatte Thu 25-Nov-10 12:10:09

How old's your DS? He sounds full of energy and determination, just like DD. I'm not really doing much with her at the moment, just letting her unload cupboards and chase the cat. It seems to satisfy her but I don't think I'm a very interesting parent. What are your plans with DS tomorrow?

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